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Original poster

The secret things you do that no-one else knows....

596 replies

Frt · 16/02/2023 11:07

Every day that DP is out of the house at work, I buy an early-afternoon energy drink. They are rancid, sugary, unhealthy and downright common as muck but I absolutely love the buzz I get for the rest of the day. DP would be appalled with me if he found out 😅

My MN habit is a secret too. I don't have children, and I'm meant to have a professional, busy job which doesn't allow time for fucking about online. But here I am. I'm friends with a lot of women with young children who regularly talk about things being discussed on MN. I feign surprise or interest but I'm really thinking "Yeah, I saw that".

When I'm stressed and home alone, I talk to myself. I talk myself through what's getting me down, why, and what I need to do. I also reassure myself saying things like "Pull yourself together, it's fine, make a list and let's start at the top". I have no shame about this, I think its a perfectly normal thing to do. Except that I talk to myself in random accents. Today I went inexplicably scouse. My temporary foreign accent syndrome is the reason I keep this particularly activity a secret.

Tell me your secrets....

BTW, long-timer but NC just in case!

OP posts:
GoChasingWaterfalls · 16/02/2023 13:56

When I'm out running on the back roads away from people I drum along to the music with my hands in front of me as though I've got drum sticks in my hands.

Elderflower14 · 16/02/2023 13:58

Whichwhatnow · 16/02/2023 13:49

I cheat at Pointless (we have it as a kind of competition). My husband is so impressed with my amazing knowledge I can't bear to tell him the truth which is that I'm surreptitiously Googling on my phone

Love this!! 🤣 🤣

larchforest · 16/02/2023 14:02

Botw1 · 16/02/2023 11:33

@larchforest

Thats hilarious!

Is it deliberate? How do you keep it up?

It just comes naturally I suppose - one is a gardening-type forum where I have a name similar to this one and other posters assume I'm a man, one is a hobby forum where people know me IRL, and one is to do with another interest I have, and on which topic I am very forthright. So they are different areas of my life.

orangelotus · 16/02/2023 14:05

Mars27 · 16/02/2023 11:28

I have a cleaner that comes every two weeks on Thursdays which is the only day of the week that my husband works at the office. He has zero idea.

Suits me just fine ;)

Oh I might steal this idea!,,

Ursuladevinia82 · 16/02/2023 14:06

orangelotus · 16/02/2023 14:05

Oh I might steal this idea!,,

Show quote history

Why? Are you also not comfortable enough in your marriage to be open about a cleaner once a fortnight?

Babyfever93 · 16/02/2023 14:08

Watching Rug cleaning videos on Facebook before bed - 15 mins of very satisfying cleaning 🙈😆

tillylula · 16/02/2023 14:09

BobbinThreadbare123 · 16/02/2023 11:36

@CharlieSays13 I like those videos as well. The relief the person must feel!
I still run upstairs on all fours. I have to stop myself doing it at work.

I run upstairs on all 4s too 🤣

MollyMack · 16/02/2023 14:10

@BloggersBlog Firstly no I wasn't married (still not married) and I'm gay but slept with a guy.

Aquael · 16/02/2023 14:12

I tell him I'm going into the office when I've actually called in sick and take a day out to myself and go for a spa day or just a massage and then out to a nice independent cafe with a book and just relax until it's time to go back home.

I don't do it often, but when I do it's for a much needed rest and recoup from life at home and work. It's bliss. This has made me realise I think I need to do it again 😆

minimadgirl · 16/02/2023 14:14

I run upstairs on all fours as well.

I always talk to my house and the deceased former owner. It was owned by only 1 person before us and I feel like she 'chose' us for this house and gave her blessing to live here. So I always talk her through what we are doing and say that we will always look after the place.

I always leave tea or coffee at the bottom of my cups for the faeries.

paulaparticles · 16/02/2023 14:15

I never dry myself after the bath. Just sit there in towel on my fone til I dry naturally 🤣

MaverickGooseGoose · 16/02/2023 14:15

TikTok

Daffodilseverywhere · 16/02/2023 14:15

IsItBedtimeYetNope · 16/02/2023 11:34

I snap my spaghetti in half instead of fannying around getting it in the pan whole like I used to. No one has noticed yet.

Brilliant idea!

Aquael · 16/02/2023 14:17

I also buy a case of Coke Zero and keep it for my use only because he rations the cans we have at home to weekends only because he says the chemicals inside are bad for us. I know they're not great. It I love the fizz so I buy my own and hide the cans I drink under the other recycling (or in the bin...🫣)

Mars27 · 16/02/2023 14:20

DartholomewSpaceInvader · 16/02/2023 13:07

I have alter egos for doing things I don't want to do. One of them is a bearded Scandinavian adventurer called Sven Jurgen, who has a trusty sidekick (and cameraman) Pål. Sometimes I send Sven in to do a boring job like clean the toilet instead of me. He narrates the whole process to Pål and when he returns he presents his mission report to the Royal Society and gets hearty slaps on the back for his accomplishments as though he'd just come back from a year long expedition up the Amazon. He is lauded wherever he goes. 😆

This will out me to a couple of people if they happen to read it but, oh well!

I love this! Lmao

idonotmind · 16/02/2023 14:22

I I lose something I ask for it back.

And 9/10 it reappears very quickly

CatnaryReturns · 16/02/2023 14:26

Biffatcrafts · 16/02/2023 11:35

When I'm alone I do the most crazy over the top make up (like I would never wear out or in front of DH) - think Glow Up but not that level of expertise - false eyelashes, outrageous lips, weird designs - then take selfies to see if I can take just one that looks good - then I delete them all and wash it all off. It's marvellously therapeutic for me transforming into someone totally different just for myself. But when DH comes home I'm back to being me.

I'd never tell my girlfriends, they'd think I was mad! 😜😁

Love this!

I once painted an elaborate skull-face in myself with my son's face paints and lay in wait for my husband in the dark. It wasn't Halloween.

Onefootinthegroove · 16/02/2023 14:28

I have a full fantasy of living alone in a motorhome, travelling around the country as I wish. I endlessly look at van living videos and auto trader .

CheeseDreamsTonight · 16/02/2023 14:28

I stand by the fridge and put together random foods to see what they taste like together.

girlmeetsboy · 16/02/2023 14:28

I secretly google the end of a film and then tell my husband I've worked it out, he's always so impressed when I'm (obviously) right!

Biffatcrafts · 16/02/2023 14:28

@CatnaryReturns oh yes! Sugar skulls are such fun to do 🤩

RudsyFarmer · 16/02/2023 14:29

God I’m struggling to even think of one.

Zola1 · 16/02/2023 14:29

I play roblox on my 8 year olds behalf while he is at school to level up his games so he's all excited when he sees.. he thinks it's magic 😂😂😐

Cuppasoupmonster · 16/02/2023 14:30

Posting on here!

SinnerBoy · 16/02/2023 14:32

I sometimes voice my dog, too. She's an ageing Labrador, who hunts out rotten shite to eat:

Aww! Sinner, you bastard! That was MY three week old chicken carcass, I was going to eat it and give myself diarrhoea for a week! Get it out of the bin and give it back!