The secret things you do that no-one else knows....

[Frt]

Every day that DP is out of the house at work, I buy an early-afternoon energy drink. They are rancid, sugary, unhealthy and downright common as muck but I absolutely love the buzz I get for the rest of the day. DP would be appalled with me if he found out 😅

My MN habit is a secret too. I don't have children, and I'm meant to have a professional, busy job which doesn't allow time for fucking about online. But here I am. I'm friends with a lot of women with young children who regularly talk about things being discussed on MN. I feign surprise or interest but I'm really thinking "Yeah, I saw that".

When I'm stressed and home alone, I talk to myself. I talk myself through what's getting me down, why, and what I need to do. I also reassure myself saying things like "Pull yourself together, it's fine, make a list and let's start at the top". I have no shame about this, I think its a perfectly normal thing to do. Except that I talk to myself in random accents. Today I went inexplicably scouse. My temporary foreign accent syndrome is the reason I keep this particularly activity a secret.

Tell me your secrets....

BTW, long-timer but NC just in case!

[Kennykenkencat]

I always thought journalism was about reporting facts, not what could essentially be fiction.

I think they are leaving themselves open to some sort of court case or scam by not labelling their “news stories” as fiction when they don’t know what is the truth or stories made up by a poster.

[Kennykenkencat]

I make up stories and post them on Mumsnet hoping they get picked up by a newspaper and are printed for all the world to see and to show off my writing skills🤣

As potential works of fiction would them using these stories to sell their newspaper entitle the posters to royalties?

[Kennykenkencat]

Dc and I secretly went on holiday when Dh was in hospital having cancer treatment and was going to be completely out of it from the effects of the surgery.

He had been in hospital for so long that it was getting very boring visiting every single day.

[CuriousMama]

@Kennykenkencat

Dc and I secretly went on holiday when Dh was in hospital having cancer treatment and was going to be completely out of it from the effects of the surgery.

He had been in hospital for so long that it was getting very boring visiting every single day.

Aww glad you enjoyed your break hun

[whoopwhoopthesoundofthepolice]

@Frt Okay, we'll let you off 😉
Must have been gold dust for the DM sharks though!

[Walterwhiteswifey]

@whoopwhoopthesoundofthepolice

@Hawkins003:

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-11763637/What-secret-no-ones-watching.html

Ffs they screenshot my answer, which was by far the most boring. I wish I'd written something super cool now 😎

[ItchySnoof]

Imagine going through your education and ending up as a completely unimaginative, failed "journalist" like Ellen Cough

[Daffodilseverywhere]

@Kennykenkencat

I always thought journalism was about reporting facts, not what could essentially be fiction.

I think they are leaving themselves open to some sort of court case or scam by not labelling their “news stories” as fiction when they don’t know what is the truth or stories made up by a poster.

Why does copyright not apply? Surely they can’t just lift content off internet forums and present it as journalism. I know they are all as thick as mince and can hardly write coherent English, but there are limits.
In general they seem to have a vocabulary of about twenty words which they shuffle regularly like a pack of cards. No critical thinking, no gathering of facts or actual reporting. It’s sickening.

[Polly291869]

Coruscating wit in the Fail's "best rated" comments thread, though:

"Mumsnet like Loose Women online"

Bagsy I be Janet Street-Porter, then. We share the same world-weary cynicism.

#teammumsnet

[wednesdaynamesep]

@quietnightmare

The worst bit about the article is have they have quoted some people who have stated no one knows they are mumsnet and the person who has a cleaner behind her husbands back. Can you imagine if those people are identified in their real lives. We don't know what kind of husband the secret cleaner person has he could fly off the handle and god knows what would happen to the posters life. Dramatic I know but we just don't know poeples situations. Daily mail are a disgrace

Oh crap. The Daily Fail printed my post. My cat is going to be so cross. Our dances were supposed to be our little secret.

[Polly291869]

Oh crap. The Daily Fail printed my post. My cat is going to be so cross. Our dances were supposed to be our little secret.

😁

[Frt]

@whoopwhoopthesoundofthepolice Thank you!

I also wanted to say that I remember Balonz too but I couldn't for the life of me remember the actual name. It's not really adequate MN long-timery justification to be like "I remember the thread about a weird name that might've had an 'm' or 'n' in the middle"

The name popped into my head this morning so now I'm off to read Balonz for a while for a giggle

[Isthislife]

@Gingerlygreen

When i go to the supermarket I sit in my car in the car park for about 15 minutes and just enjoy the peace and solitude, sometimes I look at my phone but other times I sit with my eyes closed and switch off.

If anyone asks why I was such a long time I say the shop was busy.

I do this too sometimes! I enjoy it a lot. Also, recently I took a "long time doing the shopping" because I had a drive thru McDonalds first, and a few weeks before that I sat in the Dunelm cafe eating a jacket potato. Literally no idea why I wouldn't say I'd done it, I just enjoyed it being my own little thing.

I'm quite late to the party but absolutely loving this thread!

[Christmascracker0]

I’ve got another one - I really like rap/drill/grime music 😬 it’s not really a big secret but I think a lot would be shocked by some of the lyrics!! It’s not very ‘me’!

[Reigateforever]

SageMist·
I make up science fiction stories in my head. I'll never write them down because I hate writing, but I love developing plots
I have only recently found out that my 3 year old lap top listens to dictation and types out what I say. No excuses now.

Supersimkin2· 16/02/2023 23:22
The cat and I have pissing contests.
Very nearly had a wet bed here.

[mishthecatfish]

I am still in love with my ex after years of being apart. He hates me though, so yeah, kinda sucks.

[animallover12345]

This one made me LOL

[SanpellegrinoIsToryFanta]

I keep secret mars bars in my knicker drawer beside my bed for when I get peckish during the night. It's a terrible habit that I developed as a child, from sneaking chocolate biscuits upstairs in the sleeves of my nightie.

[Jumpmom1]

The accent made me laugh so much. I do this too. Some days I’m Irish, others Yorkshire. Clean the house all the while fecking cursing the goblins who live here making the mess in a glorious southern Irish accent. Love it. 😂😂😂

[HurryShadow]

@paulaparticles

I never dry myself after the bath. Just sit there in towel on my fone til I dry naturally 🤣

I do this. I only really realised the other day when I saw DH drying his legs with a towel and thought "that looks weird - I never have to dry my legs"!

Mind you, he has the thickest leg hair I've ever seen on a bloke so he probably has to remove much of the excess water or he'll be there all day waiting for it to dry naturally.

[Climbingthelaundrymountain]

I talk to myself and play out conversations with people all the time.

I also love watching videos of people squeezing sponges on Instagram.

[Blueskies3]

I have talked to trees and given them a hug. I have also talked to my car and said thank you to it

[Doowop1919]

@RubiesandRose

I do the voice for my dog and speak as if it's him.

He's a french bulldog so has a slight french accent and also swears a lot.

For example I'll ask him to go out and a do a wee and then answer myself in his faux french accent with a "are you fucking mad, it's fucking freezing out there, I'm a dog not a fucking snow leopard!"

I do it in front of my husband and grown up kids but nobody else.

My old dog was a big Rhodesian Ridgeback and he had a Scooby Doo voice!

🤣🤣 this made me laugh.

[Kittycat37uk]

Sometimes when my partner is at work and I'm hungry but can't be bothered I will order a McDonald's on uber eats but I throw all the packaging and any evidence I ate anything in the big bin outside then if when he gets in from work he wants a takeaway I will say I've not eaten all day to get an unbeknownst to him 2nd takeaway

[BalloonInvestigator]

I am a spy 😎 When I go food shopping, the type and brand of food I put in the basket is the code needed for my contact, who is also milling round the supermarket awaiting instructions via my code shopping.

Any litter I put in public bins is actually a dead drop.

All in my head of course!