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Original poster

What just happened?! I don't know what to make of this.

484 replies

Believers · 14/12/2022 00:52

I've had the strangest experience tonight and I don't know how to explain it.

I volunteer with a charity, and tonight myself and 3 others from there went out to a pub I've never been to before for a pre-Christmas drink.

At one point I went to the toilet and as I was on my way out a woman was on her way in. We exchanged pleasantries and went on our separate ways.

About 5 minutes after I'd joined my friends, this same woman came up to us, and sat next to me on the banquette thing. She took my hand and said she had to tell me something.

It was all a bit odd, but I figured she'd maybe had a drink, and I had no objection to her joining us. But then she said to me that she had xxx with her and he wanted me to know that he was happy, that he loved me and that it was time I moved on. She was crying as she said this and I started crying too because xxx was the name of my late dh.

I have no idea how she could've known any of this. None of us knew her, I'd never been to that pub before, dh's name isn't wildly unusual but not that common either, why did she come and find me after our brief encounter in the toilet etc.

I can't get my head around it! Any ideas?!

OP posts:
Cherryana · 14/12/2022 03:51

I think things like that are a bit discombobulating because they shake what we think we know about the universe and how the world works. We know very little about that….

I have had this happen to me four times - once the guy was accurate and once the (different) guy was not. First guy was very specific, second guy was so general and I have two people tell me I will have a third child. I am 44 so it hasn’t happened yet …

SomethingOriginal2 · 14/12/2022 03:54

Honestly, obviously there are loads of scammers. But if there is any kind of afterlife, which many many people believe there is. Then the idea that a few out of the BILLIONS of people on this planet can sense it really isn't that out there. There are extraordinary people in the world.

Saythreehailmarys · 14/12/2022 04:02

I had such a strange experience a few weeks ago. Was in a local park with my DD (1.5), and noticed a little plaque near a tree in memory of a child that had died aged just 3 months. I contemplated it for a moment when out of nowhere my daughter said ‘baby’ twice, and looked at me. Really freaked me out!!

Maverickess · 14/12/2022 04:08

I'm sorry for the loss of your husband 💐

I'm someone who believes in this sort of thing, but, I do think people who can genuinely pick up on whatever is left after we die, and what happens to it are few and far between and there's far, far more fakers out there that take advantage of grief.

I also think that it's wrong for her to have done this, she had no idea how that would affect you, even if she was one of the rare genuine ones and it doesn't sit right with me that she did that to be honest.

Is it possible she saw an obituary/article/social media post regarding your husband with a picture and remembered you? I know you said it was 6 years ago, but it's possible she would remember, or remember enough to look up the other details on her phone in the loo before coming back to you.
And unfortunately I would suspect that 'what's in it for her' would be the possibility of future business having gained your trust like this in the first place.

I hope you're ok.

Morestrangethings · 14/12/2022 04:59

She could be for real. I don’t dismiss this sort of stuff because I’ve experienced a presence or ‘ghost’ feeling a few times. So has my daughter. As has my sister and my father. Also, My daughter has a friend who told her that my deceased brother had ‘visited’ her, and he wanted me to know that my son, who was very ill at the time would be okay, eventually. I did take some comfort in that, and my son did get better. But who knows, really.

This woman could also have some knowledge of you somehow, or her guess was a lucky one.

But if she turns up again, or contacts you etc., I’d think she is looking to scam you. Hopefully she won’t.

Be cautious.

Beautiful3 · 14/12/2022 05:52

She is a medium and received a message for you. I went on a course, where I met a medium. She was definitely 100% genuine. I recieved a message and a description of the deceased. They said he's not verbal but waving his hands around, making a lot of gestures. This was someone I knew, who was deaf and used sign language! He died when I was a child and I've not spoken about him for the past 30 years! Accept the message as real. She wasn't scamming you, as she has nothing to gain from it, apart from looking like a werido.

Nancywhiskey · 14/12/2022 06:17

I think that's lovely. Maybe accept it at face value

CornishTiger · 14/12/2022 06:22

JaneAustensHeroine · 14/12/2022 02:02

This has happened to me before at a bus stop. Innocently sat there, hundreds of miles from home, woman beside me suddenly turned and said sorry to disturb me but she had a message from spirit for me. Absolutely spot on with details.

Unless you have had an accurate mediumship reading it’s easy to dismiss it. However she did tell me one particular thing that absolutely no-one knew that was very much on my mind at that time. She also knew that it was a very special anniversary which she would not have been able to guess.

I hope the message has reassured you rather than disturbed you OP. Some people do have a psychic ability and, while there will be many fakes out there, there are some very genuine people too.

this

CornishTiger · 14/12/2022 06:23

We can’t explain everything just hope you found comfort in the message.

RedHelenB · 14/12/2022 06:27

EmmaAgain22 · 14/12/2022 01:05

Couple of possibilities

  1. she knows of you through someone

  2. she's genuine.

Anyway, I hope you're okay.

Or 3 she thinks she's genuine and accidentally hit on the ex dh's name.
What else did she say?

tunthebloodyalarmoff · 14/12/2022 06:35

Yes she is a medium. Take comfort from it. I went to see one and she told me things no one could ever know I totally believe

Mummyoflittledragon · 14/12/2022 06:38

I think there are a lot of charlatans out there precisely because they don’t believe humans can communicate with others either dead or alive on any level other than through tangible communication channels. This then leaves a certain number of people, who can or at least potentially can communicate in other ways. My thoughts are that we used to attune to each other in a way that animals can, this being a type of telepathy. I think we have largely lost this power through a combination of being human brained and the structure of western values and belief systems.

I believe there is some kind of universal consciousness, rather like the telepathy thing in animals. Scientists for example have trained rats to fear something. Their offspring have then ‘remembered’ the fears passed to them even though they have no personal experience. Perhaps this would account for why people have often come up with the same idea thousands of miles away at a time, when they wouldn’t have been able to communicate, ie multiple discovery / simultaneous invention. As others have mentioned, some children remember dead people or remember being someone other than themselves. How could that be? Perhaps reincarnation a thing or some kind of universal consciousness that we suppress as we stop believing in when we age and start to see the world through 3 dimensions.

In any case, op there are things, which cannot be explained. I would personally believe what had been told to me. Whether this person is directly communicating with your dh or some kind of universal consciousness, where your dh thoughts rest, idk. Hopefully you can take solace in the words. He loved you and wanted you to be happy.

IncompleteSenten · 14/12/2022 06:40

Either a lucky guess or she recognised you or your friends had been talking about you and mentioned your late husband's name and didn't want to admit it.

MardyHa · 14/12/2022 06:45

Could she have looked you up on social media via the charity? Are you googleable?

RudsyFarmer · 14/12/2022 06:45

As opposed to lots of people telling you it’s nonsense how about you listen to her message instead. He’s happy, he loves you, perhaps it’s time to allow new love into your life. I see zero harm in embracing this as a message.

Zone2NorthLondon · 14/12/2022 06:47

Dotellhimpike · 14/12/2022 03:49

I've just finished reading Beyond Black by Hilary Mantel and this could be a scene from the book.

absolutely! Great book

Blueblell · 14/12/2022 06:48

Maybe she overheard a conversation between other members of your group talking about your DH. It’s coming up to Christmas - I can imagine a conversation where one of them says something like it must be difficult for you without xxx this time of year.

Runningintolife · 14/12/2022 06:49

Its ok to choose to think whatever you like about it ❤️ including both things - both belief and scepticism help us.

Suzi888 · 14/12/2022 06:53

“But ime there are some people who do seem to be able to connect to something "other". Children seem to be more open to this. I remember as a child I had "memories" of people who had died before I was born.”

Same. As a young child DM would hear me talking in my bedroom, she asked who and I replied “my nan”. I wouldn’t elaborate though, DM’s mum had passed away a few years before I was born.

I don’t believe in God/ghosts, the unexplained. Nothing like this has ever happened since.

CopenhagenMummy · 14/12/2022 07:00

She had a message to you. It’s up to you if you believe it or not. It was a lovely message so why not believe it and be grateful this happened.

knittingaddict · 14/12/2022 07:00

It won't be genuine because none of them are genuine. People living can't talk to the dead. She might be mentally ill or a scammer or an attention seeker, but it will not be real.

Thinking about it, I feel quite angry on your behalf op. What an utterly selfish, insensitive thing to do to you. I'm sure she does it to others too with no thought for how confusing and upsetting it would be. Just so she can get her kicks. Self absorbed idiot.😡

knittingaddict · 14/12/2022 07:01

Blueblell · 14/12/2022 06:48

Maybe she overheard a conversation between other members of your group talking about your DH. It’s coming up to Christmas - I can imagine a conversation where one of them says something like it must be difficult for you without xxx this time of year.

This is the most likely explanation.

DarkNecessities · 14/12/2022 07:02

I suspect she followed you into the loos to tell you but you were then exiting so she was unable to.

However, maybe someone she was with knew your situation and mentioned it to her. Your DH was obviously quite young when he died and people do remember.

Whatifthegrassisblue · 14/12/2022 07:03

Sounds lovely, I'd just appreciate the experience. I'm not woo, but I had some random at a party tell me I would have a baby (I actually had to get it out of her), I had been trying for years to conceive and was starting to consider IVF. DC has been happily playing today ☺️

DarkNecessities · 14/12/2022 07:05

I also suspect your friends may have talked about it whilst you were in the loo