Starting a ‘wee only’ rule in the en-suite rule?

[Notsympatheticenough]

new house. En-suite isn’t as soundproof as old en-suite. Dh’s ablutions in the morning are…loud. Is it unreasonable I ask him to use the family bathroom?

he says the loo is more comfortable in The en suite. He has no embarrassment factor.

maybe I could offer to stop doing something that annoys him?

He is banned?!

That is weird! And they aren't pooing in your bedroom - it is a separate room

I don't know how we would have all managed with chamber pots back in the day.

We don't have a rule but if we are in bed then DH will go down the hallway to the bathroom for a poo (even though our en-suite does have robust walls and a window!). To be fair there's only 2 of us in the house though so no other demands on the bathroom. But it wouldn't be a showstopper if he didn't. It's not the end of the world.

@Livpool it was lighthearted! No he's not banned, but it's my bathroom, he uses the main bathroom.

PMSL

I’m so glad we don’t have an en-suite anymore as it naturally avoids things like this.

I have a huge dislike of overhearring people on the toilet and can feel myself getting tense when I can.

To me, I think other people should be considerate enough not to use en-suites for pooing when people are in bed. I accept it’s my problem if I get worked up about something totally natural if it’s done considerately in the main bathrooms!

@stuntbubbles

It’s a normal bodily function that has no place in the bedroom

No-one is shitting in the bedroom FFS. They are having a poo in a toilet in the bathroom.

I live for my en-suite!! I’m single and so not faced with the problems you do, but I find it a comfort to poo in my en-suite. I don’t use any other bathroom and dread the day I won’t have my own en-suite or a man.

I've only recently got my first en suite and it didn't occur to me that I should be banning DP from taking a crap in there. He's a noisy bugger as well, good job I love him I guess!

We do have a window though, and it's an old Victorian house so decent walls. Plus the main bathroom is downstairs and it's bloody cold in this house so would feel mean making him walk all that way

We only pee in the ensuite (or rather did when we had one) due to think walls. It's just polite. I don't like ensuites for this exact reason.

'En-suites are disgusting' is a wildly sweeping statement. Our en-suite is huge. Massive walk in shower. Separate bath. Two basins. Loo. Our bedroom is L shaped. The door to the en-suite is on the far end of the part of the L that doesn't have the bed in it. To be frank, it's further away from the bed than some beds are from family bathrooms.
The en-suites you may have seen may be disgusting but ours is a haven of tranquility that I don't have to share with teens or guests. Bliss.

@stuntbubbles it’s just a poo , the smell is not going to harm you
presumably people have things called doors which prevent the dirty poo spores leaking in to their Egyptian cotton
im laughing too much at this thread 🤣

There's a reason that there used to be a regulation that there had to be at least two doors between a bathroom and a kitchen, and it's that it's not hygienic to have poo germs going from a bathroom into the next room.

Mediaeval MN: AIBU to banish dear husbande forthwith from shared usage of Ye best chamber pot after his soilings besmirched the rim following too much ale? And do not getteth me started on the underbed whifferies ...

I do find the notion of enforcing "rules" like this on another adult very odd.

Surely it's up to each adult what they do and where. If you really do find it unpleasant and unbearable, then maybe a conversation and a request but so many people on here apparently insist to their DH that there's a no pooing in the ensuite rule. I'm pretty certain if a woman came on here to say that her DH had enforced an arbitrary rule about how a room in the house could be used, there would be plenty of comments about being controlling....

Personally, I'm not a fan of ensuites as I like a bit of privacy and I don't want to have a conversation with DH while he's having a poo (he is completely different to me and will happily leave the door open). I find it a bit of a mood killer but still, I can't imagine laying down rules for DH to obey. And honestly, if I asked him not to poo in the ensuite, he'd think I was being really, really unreasonable. I don't see how my feelings on the subject trump his.

@Fufumcgoo

It's really not weird to not want somebody shitting in your bedroom

What kind of weird en-suites have you been in? Our en-suite is a whole separate room. It has a door. The door is nowhere near the bed. How is this different from a bedroom next to a family bathroom? It isn't any different. You have misunderstood en-suites if you think it means shutting in the bedroom.

On balance, it’s the noises that give me the ick rather than the smell. And the protracted grunting. How long can it take? Fire one out and carry on - 5 mins tops?

We have an en suite, it’s lovely and not at all disgusting. I’ve also never come across anyone who grunts when they shit, if I had we would never have made it past the mini break stage 😁

Well, it's a bit like him bringing a plate of eggs into the bedroom and eating them while you are trying to sleep. Yes, it's a normal biological function, but when someone is sleeping, take it elsewhere!

And there is a reason there is no longer that regulation: one door is sufficient.

Surely just a bit of consideration/common sense is called for here? If someone is in the bedroom or it's right before bedtime, use another bathroom. If the room is empty, it's fine. 🤷🏽‍♀️

We only have one toilet (bathroom) and it's next to our bedroom 😢

We have a vent connected to the light and Dh insulated the walls well when he re did the ensuite, you can't hear or smell anything if you use the loo, and do a squirt of febreeze neutraliser spray. We both use it fully, otherwise there's no point in having one. We've had ensues in our houses since 93 snd I'd hate not to have one now.

Stealth boast 😂😂