Tom Parker's widow and new boyfriend

[ImJustMadAboutSaffron]

The press have started reporting on Kelsey Parker dating a "convicted killer" 8 months after her husband Tom died. She has two very small children. Is it too soon, is it none of our business?

I wouldn't say it is advisable, but that's my own view only.

I came on here to say just this. The grovelling attitude of some posters towards truly inexcusable male violence is dismaying. This wasn't 'daft young lads having a scrap' or 'two drunks fighting over a taxi' as some have suggested. Sean Boggans killed a man who was waiting for a lift from his girlfriend outside a pub. It was a macho 'are you looking at me?' killing. He either has a violent temper or he's one of those cocky, arrogant men who will commit violence to give his mates a laugh. Either way, I wouldn't want him around two tiny children. Children are placed at a heightened risk of abuse when their mother gains a new partner so to choose a new partner with a proven record of violence and anger management issues shows incredibly poor judgement. She can date who she likes but her children aren't in a position to consent to exposure to a violent criminal. Hopefully she'll come to her senses.

I don't know how she can be arsed tbh.

It's her life and business but it does seem quick as they haven't even had their first Christmas without him yet and I know that isn't a "thing" for many but to them as a family it seemed to be important.

As others have said though until you are in that situation never, say never.

Totally agree with this. She's choosing to showcase her new relationship and her children. I don't judge her for the new relationship per se (though hopefully he hasn't met her kids, it's way too soon for that) but anyone who monetises their children deserves a side eye.

All of this. I didn’t know the details until I read these posts but they say a great deal about the type of person he is. Even if he’s one of the rare cases who have reformed in prison, there are millions of better men out there.

Completely agree with you.

It's obviously her choice when and who she dates. If i were Tom's family I'd be really upset though .

Exactly. She isn't the only person grieving. If my dm died I'd of course want df ro be happy but really, not to start dating within months.

It has disaster written all over it. Her kids will still be grieving, but some people will always put their romantic life first.

It's none of your business

I don't think someone with two very young children has the luxury of barely being able to get out of bed for six months.

I was the child when my surviving parent married within months of the other parent dying. I just wanted them to be happy and it didn't mean any of us didn't love the deceased parent enough, 56 years later I talk about both of them all the time ( the other parent died 20years ago) and my children and GC know lots of stories about them.

My lovely aunt said I obviously didn't love my parent as I wasn't playing up about the wedding. It is very hurtful to say that, my grief is mine not something for anyone else to judge and this young woman is the same.

It's in the public eye. She is making a reality show. She has instagram accounts for her children. If people don't want anyone to know their "business" they should keep it private. Otherwise, people will have views, and some of those people will comment on a public forum.

It's not necessarily the fact that she has a man per se so soon after being widowed, but the person she has chosen. I am sure there are better candidates out there.

@HoofWankingSpangleCunt Hey there, Hoof, it's been a while, hasn't it? Hope all going well with you.

OP, I won't derail your thread, we have a fundamental difference of opinion as we're posting on another thread where my stance is the same, ie. minding my own business.

I wonder though, going back to this thread, if you think that this woman is such a trainwreck, why, why, why would you be giving her airtime by watching the programme in the first place and then posting about the self same issue? There's nothing that you can do about it. Would I date a killer? Probably not. Would I be summoned to talk about it on a TV programme? Definitely not.

You and quite a few others are hoicking your collective bosoms about something you have zero control or impact on. What is distasteful to me is that this woman is bereaved and this thread is chock full of posters who would never do this, never do that. Not the same circumstances at all.

Everybody who is bereaved deals with that differently. This woman is in the public eye, yes. But she is bereaved and so are her family. I can't imagine how much worse that would be if you live your life being feted/pulled down by people who do not know you, know nothing about you. I also can't imagine being one of those people enjoying any fall or misery with such relish.

I'll leave it there. We'll never agree. So be it. <handshake emoji>

Just some kudos for ancientgran

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Thank you for the flowers. Always nice on a bleak November day.

why, why, why would you be giving her airtime by watching the programme in the first place and then posting about the self same issue?

I'm not watching the programme. I know about it because I read about it in the Yorkshire Post.

I was really impressed by the way she handled herself after Tom died. She seems like a lovely women but I'm sorry I couldn't even consider dating again so soon after I lost my beloved husband with two little kids who I'd want to give my all to, not least one with a criminal conviction.

You have absolutely no idea what you would do until you’re in it

Hopefully I wouldn't be dating a convicted killer 6 months after my husband died and my kids were still grieving. Who knows though!

@Flooper exactly, he might not have done it deliberately but to punch someone and walk away is pretty grim.

It's a tricky one, no two people are the same, but ultimately it's her choice when she feels ready to start a new relationship.

She is creating a tv show about life after Tom, she shares a lot on her public socials and gives interviews so I'm sure she isn't expecting to live in complete privacy. She should be able to take steps to start a relationship in her own time though.

I think the issue people have is that the bloke has an unpleasant history and may be violent. Therefore not an inappropriate person to have around her children (not suggesting she has introduced them, she probably hasn't yet).

The Wanted have some pretty intense fans and have been quite vocal on Twitter about it, it's not nice and she should be left to do what she feels is right for her.

Rio Ferdinand also moved on extremely quickly after his wife died. I guess some people manage grief like this? I would judge letting a criminal near my children though.

Rio Ferdinand moved on quite a few times even when his wife was alive.

Eurgh… yes he did. That was why I couldn’t bear the bloody documentary he made about what a wonderful fucking father he is being a single dad after his wife died. No
mention of how he treated her.

I didn’t watch it either.

Think it’s way too soon tbh - especially with small children and while recently widowed - maybe a rebound relationship?