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Original poster

Secondary Cancer confirmed I dont know what to

293 replies

EachandEveryone · 11/11/2022 16:53

Im numb. I went to the haemotolgist with a lump in my groin 5cm. He really thought it was lymphoma and was direct that it would be cancer. The biopsy was sent off a week ago. And hes just rang its mestatic. Its like a dream. I feel fine. Thats it for me isnt it? Im only 55 where could it be from?

OP posts:
Original poster
EachandEveryone · 19/12/2022 22:31

Ive got that free gin liquor from M and S😃 and im ashamed to say theres a packet of fags in my boot because Im back on them before I go to bed and again at 4am when I wake up and need to go outside. I just dont have it in me to give them up again at the moment.

OP posts:
ClangingBell · 19/12/2022 22:37

I hope the booze and fags help and you get some more info on Wednesday.

mistopheles · 19/12/2022 22:44

I think Baileys/free gin liquor and fags definitely allowed right now. Until you have a plan anyway - fags can be part of the reward for getting through the plan whatever it may be. You do seem to be being well looked after. I think staying in London was a good idea.

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Original poster
EachandEveryone · 19/12/2022 22:52

Im hoping to go home for xmas but the trains after to come back might be a problem. Ill play it by ear.

OP posts:
Batcountry8 · 19/12/2022 22:56

Hi, how far away is home by train.
Could you get a coach back ?

X

AcerbicColleague · 20/12/2022 10:06

EachandEveryone · 19/12/2022 22:31

Ive got that free gin liquor from M and S😃 and im ashamed to say theres a packet of fags in my boot because Im back on them before I go to bed and again at 4am when I wake up and need to go outside. I just dont have it in me to give them up again at the moment.

Gosh, don't beat yourself up, you are dealing with enough. I hope that your booze and fags give you a little relief xx

fairycupcakes · 21/12/2022 13:48

Hey @EachandEveryone like other pp have said don’t beat yourself up, enjoy the booze and cigs and your Christmas too ❤️ Have you had any results or updates today?

Nimbostratus100 · 21/12/2022 13:53

sending you lots of love xxx

MissyB1 · 21/12/2022 14:10

Glad the hospital seem to be getting things moving for you, it seems to be a case of ruling things out one by one until they find the culprit. Sounds like you have good support in London, that’s great. Don’t stress about travelling anywhere for Christmas, let people visit you instead, or go to friends.

Original poster
EachandEveryone · 21/12/2022 19:49

My friend thinks today was better news. I feel like Im no further forward☹️ And that thin thing could start travelling at any moment.

it was a different consultant today what threw me off. MRI showed nothing except the cancer in my groin and a bit of cancer now in my right groin. Now he wants me to see plastics to rule out skin cancer. They have had a meeting and are now not sure if its a primary or secondary. Apparently the plastics have said they want it just to be taken out. This chap seemed to think we should do more investigations. My original consultant said chemo in January no matter what the results were.

I cant bloody take it. Hes telling me today its good news its nowhere else. Big bloody deal I knew that from the CT scan etc. I just want some f in treatment to start. Ive googled cancers of the lymph nodes and there arent any that match my biopsy.

i feel so well and now Im wondering if those antivaxxers were right and I should never have had the booster in September! I know thats completely irrantional I just need answers.

OP posts:
OldFan · 21/12/2022 21:08

I cant bloody take it. Hes telling me today its good news its nowhere else. Big bloody deal I knew that from the CT scan etc.

They were telling you it was a secondary which would've meant a far worse potential prognosis. They're not now. Smile

MissyB1 · 21/12/2022 21:12

Oh I’m so sorry all this uncertainty must be really stressful 🙁 I know you will feel you need answers and a plan. Sometimes they just don’t have all the answers straight away, that feels shit though. There will be a plan soon 🤞 when all the information gathering is done. Meantime you need ways to deal with the anxiety. Sending calming vibes.

Original poster
EachandEveryone · 21/12/2022 22:39

OldFan · 21/12/2022 21:08

I cant bloody take it. Hes telling me today its good news its nowhere else. Big bloody deal I knew that from the CT scan etc.

They were telling you it was a secondary which would've meant a far worse potential prognosis. They're not now. Smile

Ive always known its nowhere else since my PET and CT scan. Meaning it was nowhere to be found the MRI was to try and find it. He said it could be a primary but doesnt know of what and its an unusual place to have a primary so really they dont know for sure. If it is a secondary and the dont find a primary. It becomes problematic to treat.

its really getting to me now.

OP posts:
OldFan · 22/12/2022 13:40

If it is a secondary and the dont find a primary. It becomes problematic to treat.

If it is a primary (seems like there's much more chance now) then it is much more optimistic to treat.

its really getting to me now.

Try and remind yourself that what he's said is actually an improvement on what they've said before- it really is. He said there was a greater possibility that it was just a primary than they'd said before. I know it can be hard to absorb that depending on the person's state of mind when they go into an appointment (this is not to be patronising- it really happens.)

It'll be fine OP, they might only have to do surgery.

EUwannabe · 22/12/2022 16:05

So sorry OP. It must be so difficult and frustrating to not have a clear picture. A while back you mentioned you had a hysterectomy - is that right? When did you have the op /ops done? Is there a possibility that when you had your ops you had the primary removed unknowingly to anyone and now you’ve been left with cancer cells that have turned into secondaries? X

adriftabroad · 22/12/2022 17:05

EUwannabe · 22/12/2022 16:05

So sorry OP. It must be so difficult and frustrating to not have a clear picture. A while back you mentioned you had a hysterectomy - is that right? When did you have the op /ops done? Is there a possibility that when you had your ops you had the primary removed unknowingly to anyone and now you’ve been left with cancer cells that have turned into secondaries? X

Well! The most obvious... brilliant thought EU that makes sense and would be very good news.

OP why did you have the hystorectomy?(If you do not mind saying)

You are in my thoughts and being incredibly brave.

Original poster
EachandEveryone · 22/12/2022 19:00

Huge fibroids. Funnily the gynae surgeon the other day said there was no sign of the histology report from it. I did see the surgeon afterwards though and he said everything went well. It was five years ago.

OP posts:
Ahwelltoobad · 23/12/2022 05:33

How are you today? Sending positive thoughts your way.
I really wish I could take your worries away.

Original poster
EachandEveryone · 23/12/2022 06:33

Ive put it away for now as I need to pack and get organised for home. My next appointment is 4th Jan. hopefully I will have a plan then. Thank you all so much x

OP posts:
adriftabroad · 23/12/2022 08:37

Have a good Christmas Each, I feel positive for you, truly. Think about it only from the 2nd, right before your appt.

I am parking my (much lesser) worries from this morning too! (Evil divorce in foreign country) we will have happy thoughts only! 😘

MissyB1 · 23/12/2022 09:09

EachandEveryone · 23/12/2022 06:33

Ive put it away for now as I need to pack and get organised for home. My next appointment is 4th Jan. hopefully I will have a plan then. Thank you all so much x

I think being with family and having Christmas stuff happening will be good for you, hopefully a happy distraction. Wishing you a peaceful and relaxing Christmas x

uncomfortablydumb53 · 23/12/2022 13:27

I hope you manage to park your worries and have a relaxing Christmas
Very best wishes to you

Original poster
EachandEveryone · 24/12/2022 23:51

There’s nothing more fun then coming home drunk on Christmas Eve at 55 and finding your mother still waiting up for you 😂😂. Merry Xmas everyone and thank you xxx

OP posts:
byebye2022 · 25/12/2022 00:09

I'm so sorry your going though this.

Shitfather · 25/12/2022 05:26

Just read your thread. I’m so sorry you are facing such an unnerving situation. Wishing you a lovely Christmas and clarity in the coming weekS. This thread has been an eye opener - I didn’t know secondaries could be diagnosed without knowing where the primary one was. Flowers