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Original poster

Friend called: panic attack driving with her DC in lightning

148 replies

Eastie77Returns · 23/10/2022 17:50

Not sure WTF to do. We went away on a trip for DS’ birthday together with a friend and her 2 DC. We left the birthday venue earlier this afternoon to drive back to London in our separate cars (roughly 3 hr drive). I drove straight home but friend stopped off for lunch. She has called me screaming hysterically that she is still many miles from home and cannot drive because of the lightning which is terrifying her. She has stopped at a service station and is experiencing a panic attack. Her DH is away for work. I don’t know what to do as I think she wants me to drive and get them but she is about 2 hours away. I’ve told her to wait until the lightning stops but she is crying, her DC are crying and I feel terrible!

OP posts:
RoseValleyRambles · 23/10/2022 17:53

Encourage her to take a break, get everyone hot chocolate and cake, and calm down. If she's not safe to drive out the lightning is going to continue, would a taxi be an option, and connect the car tomorrow, even if just to the nearest public transport?

Presumably she's experienced this before so knows what's safe for her.

Ilovenotebooks · 23/10/2022 17:55

I couldn't leave a friend in a state like that. Go and get her.

mothertrucking · 23/10/2022 17:57

Would she continue to drive if you were still on the phone to her? Hands free obviously.

FuckingHell123 · 23/10/2022 17:57

Is it possible for her to check into a hotel for the night?

TheOnlyBeeInYourBonnet · 23/10/2022 17:57

Your advice is solid OP. She can wait it out. A weather radar on her phone might help, she will be able to watch the storm move away.

JabberwockyPie · 23/10/2022 17:57

Breathing into a paper bag would help her. Although personally, if it was my mate, I'd go and get her.

Sparkletastic · 23/10/2022 17:58

She's stopped so she and the children are safe. The storm will pass over then she can continue home. Encourage her to breath properly and practice distraction techniques.

Brahumbug · 23/10/2022 17:58

Re assure her that she is completely safe in her car.

bercan · 23/10/2022 17:59

tbh we were just out in it & it was like something out of movie.

bercan · 23/10/2022 17:59

and I was with DH on residential roads

BillieHolliday · 23/10/2022 18:01

The car will conduct a lightning strike into the ground. Surely if she's afraid to drive she shouldn't be asking you to drive?!

FaazoHuyzeoSix · 23/10/2022 18:03

She is safe in the car. There is no need to panic. Lightning cannot hurt you directly when you are inside a car. The possible dangers are (a) if moving, you could be distracted by the flashes and that could trigger a crash or (b) if you park, and you park under a tree, the tree could get struck by lightning and fall on you. So if she is stationary and not under a tree she is safe. Inside a metal frame with rubber tyres between you and the ground is possibly the safest place to be whilst there's a thunderstorm going on.

Look at her location on Accuweather.com to see if there's likely to be a break in the weather soon. It may be that she can continue on her way shortly.

SleepingStandingUp · 23/10/2022 18:04

Those saying op should just get her, she's TWO HOURS away, she needs help coping now and calming down now not leaving alone for two hours.

OP can you call her back and talk them into locking the car up and going into the service station? Is there anything open or is it just like a pay point? Talk her through breathing into a bag, get the kids on a video call to play eye spy with her kids so she can get a break from them.

You're more use talking to her now for two hours until she calms down than her getting herself ore and more worked up for two hours waiting for you

MassiveSalad22 · 23/10/2022 18:05

Yeah if she’s scared to drive in the storm then she is very unreasonable to ask you to drive to get her. If she’s just scared of the lightening itself then that’s a bit different.

bercan · 23/10/2022 18:06

is it just the lighting she is scared of? that will stop

Spareline · 23/10/2022 18:07

Yes, don’t go and get her and drive back, that’s insane. Talk to her and calm her down. The storm passed here within minutes.

Once she’s back and calmer, I might consider suggesting she seeks help if her reaction to a storm is to scream hysterically, panic, refuse to drive and frighten her kids in the process.

crumpet · 23/10/2022 18:07

Surely if she’s at a service station she can go inside and wait for it to pass. If you could encourage her to not scare the children that would be good - even if she is scared inside she should be trying to reassure them

RisingSunn · 23/10/2022 18:08

Oh gosh. Poor thing. I’ve just abandoned my plan for hot chocolate and cake at the local cafe because the flashes and downpours were ridiculous. I had to run home mid way.

Assure her it will pass - she’s in a safe place.

IncompleteSenten · 23/10/2022 18:08

You need to try to get her to calm down. She's stopped. She's safe. They can get some drinks and snacks and wait it out.

antipodeancanary · 23/10/2022 18:09

Please don't go and get her op! You will drive two hours in lighting so she doesn't have to? It will have stopped by the time you are there anyway. She sits tight, regains herself, panic attacks are self limiting and after a cuppa she drives herself back.

Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 23/10/2022 18:09

Yes she is absolutely terrified of lighting.

I can’t go and get her as I am at home with DS and DD and have no-one to leave them with.

She’s 1.5 - 2 hrs from me. We were driving back to London from Birmingham and she is in a service station by the motorway. I’ve told her to go inside into the cafe as she is in a Road Chef type place but she is too scared to leave the car in case she is struck by lightning.

OP posts:
TheOnlyBeeInYourBonnet · 23/10/2022 18:13

Bloody hell, her poor kids.

2ManyPjs · 23/10/2022 18:13

Tell her to run inside when there's a break in the lightning and get herself and kids some warm drinks.

She can then track the storm as it moves away on this webpage and then once it's calmer hopefully she will be too.

www.lightningmaps.org/#m=oss;t=3;s=0;o=0;b=;ts=0;

Cantthinkofanewnameatm · 23/10/2022 18:13

By the time you’ve driven 2 hours the storm will have passed. And then you have two cars that are two hours from home so I don’t see how she’ll get he4 car home.
Cars are safe in a storm , rubber tyres touching the ground. Tell her to get a hot drink each and some carbs ( calming) then drive once the storm has passed.

latetothefisting · 23/10/2022 18:14

All those saying op should go and get her how would that work exactly?
Even if you're assuming op has someone at home she can leave her own kids with, by the time she drives back to friend the storm will have passed anyway. Not only will it mean op has to drive 7 hours in a day what will happen to the second car if she drives to get her friend? Leaving it overnight will cost a fortune in a service station and someone will still have to go back and get it (so another 4 hours drive) the next day.

Friend can just wait the storm out or pay for a taxi. Her kids are probably only scared because their mum is wailing and panicking!