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What happens to all the mean girls

354 replies

RedPanda901 · 09/10/2022 14:35

My daughter was talking about the mean girls in her school and it made me ask what she meant. I mean I knew what she meant but wondered what her experience of it was. In her words: they are dismissive of the girls they don't like; talk down to other girls; laugh and bully them to make others do what they want.

Just out of interest…
Are you a mean girl? Were you a mean girl? What made you change?

OP posts:
mackthepony · 10/10/2022 00:01

We had a mean girl cliche at my hard as nails working class comp in Lancashire.

But they were nowhere near as awful as the rich, private school educated ones I met whilst working 'seasons' abroad. They were absolutely awful. I often wonder if they ever realised how bad they were, or ever self reflected.

Terrible

AntimemeticsDivision · 10/10/2022 00:03

@MargotChateau

According to me nothing.

Ok.

VeronicaFranklin · 10/10/2022 00:11

All the 'mean girls' at my high school are now trying to friend request me on Facebook to sell me wax melts, juice plus or knock off perfumes!

AntimemeticsDivision · 10/10/2022 00:18

I think @Carrotzen is right.

There is a difference between the 'mean girls' and the privileged girls.

I was always really privileged, but not 'mean'

I was never cruel.

And I always saw the 'mean girls' as young women that had a bad life. They were mean because their life was shit, not because it was great.

And I'm sorry to anyone that was bullied at school.

But the 'mean girls' were as much as a victim as you.

BalonzIsASurreyName · 10/10/2022 00:26

And trauma happens in all social classes

BalonzIsASurreyName · 10/10/2022 00:27

Not saying all mean girls did it because of that. Some did.

mathanxiety · 10/10/2022 00:37

There were a few in primary school with me. Unfortunately we were also neighbours.

All the neighbours knew that their father was a tyrant and their mother - possibly - compensated for a horrible life by being cutting and mean with neighbours she decided to target.

They have drifted as adults. Lots of ill-advised relationships, sacked from jobs, genuine talents gone to waste, sad.

AntimemeticsDivision · 10/10/2022 01:15

As @mathanxiety has observed.

Bad famil.

Bad result.

bluetongue · 10/10/2022 01:57

I think a fair few go into law (I know plenty of lovely lawyers too before any lawyers here are offended).

BalonzIsASurreyName · 10/10/2022 02:14

bluetongue · 10/10/2022 01:57

I think a fair few go into law (I know plenty of lovely lawyers too before any lawyers here are offended).

I did.

BalonzIsASurreyName · 10/10/2022 02:21

@bluetongue mind you, many non bullies went for similar careers. ThE victims did too. So not sure there's a connection

Thirdsummerofourdiscontent · 10/10/2022 03:04

Ours went on to become a pe/sports teacher. Still a bitch though.

BalonzIsASurreyName · 10/10/2022 03:57

Thirdsummerofourdiscontent · 10/10/2022 03:04

Ours went on to become a pe/sports teacher. Still a bitch though.

There are a lot of bullying PE teachers out there. Not surprised.

Allthenamesaretaken0 · 10/10/2022 07:23

They all got pregnant very young and don't have a lot to show for themselves. And I went to an all girl's school so tell your daughter don't worry they won't succeed in life! 😂

SparklyShoesandTutus · 10/10/2022 07:59

I moved away for uni and then family moved so I've not really been back. Recently came across one of our school mean girls on TV in what became a popular TV series she has recently been in another. I get the sense she still has the same view of her own self importance but who knows

Kanaloa · 10/10/2022 08:31

Thirdsummerofourdiscontent · 10/10/2022 03:04

Ours went on to become a pe/sports teacher. Still a bitch though.

God my PE teachers were like the epitome of mean girls. I only remember two specifically but they were like mean girls grown up and in power. And they used to favour more popular and sporty kids over those of us who actually could have used a bit of support in that subject.

Coucous · 10/10/2022 09:11

PE teachers at my daughter's school have serious issues too - maybe it's just a thing.

Arbesque · 10/10/2022 09:19

They drift off in separate directions. Some outgrow their teenage insecurities and become perfectly nice adults. Some continue to put other people down and become the colleagues and neighbours that other people dislike.

Some are intelligent people who knuckle down and go onto good or rewarding jobs. Some waste their intelligence and talents, or never had much in the first place and end up unhappy and unfulfilled. Some lead chaotic lives, others perfectly functioning ones.

You can't generalise.

Tiredasamf · 10/10/2022 09:27

The mean girls from my school are all alone now. Not friends with each other anymore, not many friends at all from what I can see.

no long term partners, no kids.

guess everyone woke up and saw them for what they are!

AlaskaThunderfuckHiiiiiiiii · 10/10/2022 09:29

The ones that bullied me are either on drugs now or work in minimum wage jobs and still living with parents. Made my life a misery

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 10/10/2022 09:43

I've come back to this thread.

There was a mean girl in our class, not mean to me nor openly but you always knew she looked down on some of us as her DP's had a house in a lovely area etc. 2 or so years ago I was having my hair done by close friend who confided that this mean girl had been nasty and bullying as the friend had transferred in from another school. She'd deliberately been nasty about new girl's background. This mean girl went on to become a 3am Mirror girl and then got investigated in the phone tapping scandal.

If you mean bullies, yes, a lot have had kids young.

Other mean girls, we all knew they were bitchy.

Another mean girl who transferred to private school with me, she was always a nasty bullying piece of work. Years later she tried to apologise by stating it was because her DM had bullied her. Approx 6 months ago I had an interaction with her, she's not changed a bit, has had children, but same bitch as before. She'd wanted to meet up/sell me stuff. No to both.

SommerTen · 10/10/2022 09:46

One of my flatmates at uni on my nursing course was a mean girl, very two faced. She would make friends with another girl then birch about them, then dump them.
Gradually over the 3 years she ran out of other girls to be mates with! She treated boyfriends very badly.
But I was the only one who ever stood up to her. I did have a bit of sympathy as she'd suffered a head injury twice & I wondered if that affected her personality at all.
I believe she's still a nurse but not sure.

At school there was a 'mean boy' who was the main drug dealer. He was a bully and again disliked that I stood up for myself when one of his mates tried it on.
I believe he's now got his own successful insurance business. He was one of those annoyingly clever types who didn't have to try hard at school.

Roarsomemore · 10/10/2022 09:55

One girl that stood out to me as fitting the mean girl stereotype is now quite a senior social worker 😕

ReneBumsWombats · 10/10/2022 10:30

Roarsomemore · 10/10/2022 09:55

One girl that stood out to me as fitting the mean girl stereotype is now quite a senior social worker 😕

Perhaps she was mean because she had the kind of home life that should have had social service intervention.

pawkins · 10/10/2022 10:37

This is trotted out a lot.
My DC is being bullied and as much as anybody who doesn’t live in the house can tell, the bully is a privileged, spoilt, rich child who also happens to be a bully.

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