ADS and the winds of change

[justasking111]

All set onward and upward friends

I'm changed - I'm just fucking broken. I went from being a mum, doing well in a degree and heading for a decent career out of it - to being marginalised by society, excluded from events because I didn't want to be sticking shit up my nose every 30 seconds, blamed for everything in the world because I reacted to the first two AZ jabs like I did and didn't want to risk more, and accused of being a grandma-murdering criminal psychopath for 2-3 years.

That tends to change a person - I was ironically, actually a rule follower before. Now, after society showed they didn't give a shit about me... I don't care much about society either really. I'm kind of plugging along, and my mental health is superficially OK - but I'll never trust the state at all again and I live in fear of rates rising and talk of masks and rules again. It's visceral - if I see just eyes - my brain fucks off and runs away in terror with me desperately trying to bring it back like a dog walker with a dog on an extendable lead who's just seen a squirrel.

@CoffeeWithCheese . It's funny what makes us twitchy following covid. Was reading a study on young children who suffered brain abscesses in Colorado. The scientists concluded the quadruple rise in cases the only common denominator was the vaccine.

Coffee obviously we've talked before, but to reiterate, I understand. I now think more of us are broken but those who went along with it for two years can't admit it.

In the last couple of months, I feel I have started to mend a little, so I hope that happens for you too. "Mending" involves some quite vicious thoughts and new approach to life based on being a bit Machiavellian. But we all have to do what we have to do.

I have a constant wariness around any possibility of masking. I understand.

I have now a healthy mistrust of all political parties because not one thought 'hang on a minute, is this right?'.

Have you the link for this study? I read that it was possibly due to lack of exposure to viruses in lockdown not the vaccines.

I'll have a look it was a while ago now @christmascalypso

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/rcna81763

Couldn't find it. But did find this one about Nevada cases.

Thank you - that was the one I read I think as cause unknown but possibly related to lack of exposure to viruses in lockdown or from exposure to Covid itself. Interesting though. I was very against lockdowns myself as I thought it would have a future effect on our immune systems.

I looked for brain abscess cases in the UK nothing found but the USA cases did make a possible connection between strep A and the abscess

I'm sorry, I know I keep harping on but it's really affecting my life for various reasons
People are still in a weird head space - or is just I am having bad luck?

I mostly find that people are cheerful and friendly, I've thought that all my life - that's gone, it seems.

Mum's neighbours are barely around and there is no chat on the WhatsApp

I can see, when out and about, that places are still heaving, but among maybe a more middle aged group, something is different.

I realise I'm on MN right now - are people now operating their normal daily chat from their phone? The powers that be really got the tech reliance they wanted through this.

I've worked at home since 2016 and it used to be a norm to have a phone chat with some clients calling claiming to check on stuff but then wanting a chat. Not any more.

Wales here. Still have masks in hospitals and GP surgeries. Hospital visiting limited. Was randomly asked to wear a mask on a replacement bus service at the railway station the other day. It’s not law, but the pressure to comply is high. GP surgery insistent on masks.

The most ridiculous thing of all is that the mental health team still aren’t seeing people face to face for assessment.

FatGirlSwim the driver asked? Wonder what the company make of that?

My last proper holiday was in Wales in in 2017. Absolutely beautiful, and I was alone and everyone was friendly and welcoming everywhere I went. I came back feeling I wanted to live there.

I now wouldn't be sure about returning, it's kind of redundant as I have to care for mum, but if I was planning to go, that would concern me.

I also find it interesting which businesses have or haven't removed signage.

I wonder what Europe is like?

Re mental health services, a lot of services will just stay online.

I read yesterday that one of the key creators of AI regrets his work. I have long hated tech but never more so than I do now.

I do think services might start up for people who can pay eg if you want a bank who does face to face, you will be offered that for a huge fee.

Wales here too. You're very unlucky. No-one asks for masks except one local hospital where flu, norovirus and c.diff was tearing through in January and February. That's been lifted now.

All healthcare providers asking for masks round here. Assumed it was throughout Wales. Been to GP today and was asked to wear a mask by the receptionist, signs up saying ‘it’s not the law but we ask you to protect the vulnerable’ etc. It’s very hard to refuse and I didn’t have the guts.

One of our local NHS trusts still mandate masks at all sites. I was due to rotate on there but, after a 3 hour meeting there where I brute forced through wearing a mask inbetween going to the loo to take it off in a closed cubicle and came home in a right state to the point of feeling dysregulated for days (for any lurking twats - I’m autistic and they really trigger sensory overload for me and it doesn’t matter if your mates kid is autistic and can wear one happily cos I can’t) to the point of basically needing to be in a dark room in silence - I applied for an alternative post to leave the rotation.

And again for any stalking twats - the bloody virus wasn’t a thing when I started training so I shouldn’t have “thought about that when I chose the job”

We still have some care homes fully masked and going into residents confined to their rooms whenever there’s an outbreak - and wondering why they’re seeing challenging behaviour off the scale and some very distressed residents.

Coffee "And again for any stalking twats - the bloody virus wasn’t a thing when I started training so I shouldn’t have “thought about that when I chose the job”

to them I say, you should have thought about infectious disease going to work in health. Genuinely puzzled by that.

@CoffeeWithCheese

Colorado brain abscess - likely due to upsurge in virus bacterial infections with weakened immunity, or related to Covid itself.

Why are you saying it’s vaccine related?

Or rather @justasking111

I'm not it's the USA that's involved here not the UK

I see we've been minority invaded with some, hopefully mis-fired @s doing the rounds.

In answer to the "should have considered infectious diseases" twit comment. Yep, considered and was jabbed against everything that we were required to be as a condition of the course. However a global overreaction, schools closing and having to home school my own kids, my degree being brought online to the point I'm still struggling to make up one area of the course which was not appropriate for optimal online delivery now as a professional (you try learning how to do a swallow assessment without even seeing another person physically)... nah. Years of face masks and them triggering sensory overload - nah. Vaccine side effects in a climate where it was so utterly toxic to even mention that in order to attempt to seek any exemption from further jabs which may have been required to continue the career... nah. I could very reasonably have wracked up my student debt (£55k when I had to update some details on my account recently) and it being for utterly nothing if the booster had been required to be considered fully vaccinated.

I'm not the person who posted stuff about brain abscesses either - I have residual issues from the AZ jab - skin rashes and horrific burning itching to the point the skin on my hands and feet will blister and crack when it flares up and some bloody awful really deep pains in my limbs which make me cry when they're at their worst - I was one of the first who queued up for the initial double jabs, so I'm not anti-vaccine at all, fairly resigned that nothing is risk free and someone will always get side effects to stuff, and that this was my turn for the bad luck end of the draw - but not wanting to risk making things any worse in terms of symptoms with additional jabs, and just wanting to be accepted that yes, I reacted badly, someone was always going to - and not fitted out by society for a tin foil hat, labelled as a Trump supporting gammon (was one notable insult) and not to have my entire career put in jeopardy over it. I still have these issues incidentally - they've not gone away over time and I've got an especially awful joint flare up at the moment which has me feeling particularly cranky. At least now I have the chance to go to the GP (although they're not seeing people face to face at all much) and might be listened to which I wouldn't have been done at the height of the toxicity.

@justasking111

The USA study doesn’t say it’s vaccine related. So I wondered where that info came from?

No funny vegetables yet but how sad are the sunflowers I tried to grow for the grandchildren this year 😭

They just need a bit of water and food. They're good and tall. 🌻

I think it’s a big seedy conspiracy from Thompson and Morgan.

I am trying growing things other than veg this year as the back garden is pretty shady so I thought flowers. Canterbury bells and pansies. I am growing courgettes this year so we may get some funny veg.

My current worry is snails. I hate to hurt them but there are far too many. It's because no one but me on our street actually gardens. This means my house is ideal because there are plants for them to eat.

Also, @BogRollBOGOF , DS and I are glad you or your DS are playing Pokémon Go again. It's helping us with XP and stardust. Thanks!