Expected to give colleague a lift every day, not even asked first!

[Workinghardeveryday]

Hopefully you may have some advice on a tricky situation my dp has.

He currently has about a 20 minute commute to work.

His boss rang him the other day to let him know there was a new person starting work, as he lives close to us, dp should pick him up and drop him off every day going forward.

It is fair enough at the moment as dp’s car is in the garage, so work have been really kind and let him use the works van.

Dp doesn’t want to look like a dick and say he refuses to do the pick up/drop off, but he is really pissed off about it.

He doesn’t mind doing while he has the van, that is absolutely fair enough, but when he gets his car back he doesn’t want to get it messed up with dirty work clothes and boots in it (he always brushes himself down and changed boots before getting in).

He also really enjoys listening to music loudly, only time he does this is the commute.

This new person is nice enough, doesn’t drive. We live rurally so no buses.

He feels really miffed this person has been given a job, only way of getting to work is my dp, yet he wasn’t even asked first!

Any ideas how to handle the situation? We really don’t know how to handle it without upsetting the boss.

If he is off sick tomorrow, he must text newbie and say he isn’t going in

This is ridiculous. He absolutely didn’t have to do this and has made it worse for himself by allowing the situation to look acceptable.

for people saying be kind… being kind is offering a lift on the occasion someone’s car is in the garage, not been pressured into daily lifts that inconvenience the driver. That’s being taken for a mug.

I would actually lose respect for my husband he didn’t have the balls to not collect his colleague today.

Why did your dh accommodate this lad. This was a perfect example of how to show his boss why this won't work. If he is still sick tomorrow and I think he should make a point by definitely being sick, then he should do whatever he normally does, ie phone in sick and stay in bed. Let them figure it out from tomorrow and then on in.

I think I'd lose respect for him too. Didn't you tell him it was a ridiculous idea? I know it isn't your problem to solve (before someone chips in with that) but couples do generally talk to and support each other. He clearly feels pressured into doing it and that's not an easy thing for some people to deal with but he has now made a rod for his own back.

I think he needs another day in bed with d&v and not to leave the house.

Getting up when sick to take him in was completely ridiculous and stupid. You two are your own worst enemies.

He got up with D&V to take his colleague to work?

Not sure I'm buying that. But it keeps the story chugging along nicely.

Oh, come on!

He isn’t a pushover honestly!

I am making him sound like one though.. He took the lad because he didn’t want to drop everyone in it at the last minute, what is wrong with that?

He’s gone today and taken him as usual.

He finds out today when he gets his car back hopefully, he is going to say something when he has a date to get it back

But it was the perfect chance to illustrate the problem to the boss. Instead, he solved the problem for them by driving the kid in when he was too sick to work.

At this point, he's made a rod for his own back.

What's wrong with it is that he's made it look like he's not just happy to do it, he will go well out of his way to do it! How can he now say he won't do it on a normal day when he's going anyway, when previously he was so desperate to bring him that he got out of his sick bed to taxi the fella to work?!

Honestly, how daft. Shot himself right in the foot.

"He isn’t a pushover honestly!"

Yet he went and took this lad to work while he himself was sick?

If that isnt the definition of a pushover, I dont know what is.

Has your DH no backbone?

This.

OP, CF depend on pushovers not having the backbone to say "Nope, not happening".

The boss is a CF.

My son works a part time job and had a slightly similar situation with his boss texted when he wanted them a few to work late and my son to drop his colleague home 20 minutes out of his way.

He text "No, it doesn't suit me to work late until 1am when I have college, and I am not a taxi service either using my Mums car."

I helped him send that and his boss now knows he will push back at CF demands.

His boss never replied and never mentioned it when he next did his regular shift.

CF🙄

This.

OP, CF depend on pushovers not having the backbone to say "Nope, not happening".

The boss is a CF.

My son works a part time job and had a slightly similar situation with his boss texted when he wanted them a few to work late and my son to drop his colleague (that he doesn't even know) home 20 minutes out of his way.

He text "No, it doesn't suit me to work late until 1am when I have college, and I am not a taxi service either using my Mums car."

I helped him send that and his boss now knows he will push back at CF demands.

His boss never replied and never mentioned it when he next did his regular shift.

CF🙄

When this person applied for a job. How did he expect to get to work if he got the job.

@Workinghardeveryday I do feel your DP needs to grow a bit of a backbone. Why can't he now tell the new guy that he'll be picking him up at X position rather than driving to his door?? Explain to the newbie that it will save him time/hassle etc? Perfectly reasonable request seen as how the kid is getting a lift to work for free!! I'm sure he can word it 'I'm sure you won't mind but I'll be picking you up from here in future & I'll be here at X time every morning' - nice & polite but firm. I also think it's totally out of order that his boss has assumed he will give this new guy a lift everyday & without even asking him first!

Jaysus.

This is not your DHs job or problem. Though by complying with the request he has tacitly complied with the request. I have no idea where that puts him for .a labour law perspective but...

As soo as he knows when he will get his car back he should inform work that he will now be traveling in his personal vehicle and that his insurance does not cover taxi services.
He will no longer be able to provide regular transport in for the other employee.
if they require this service he would like the change of circumstances in writing and expects to be compensated for this addition responsibility in the following ways:

Hours increased to cover this addional work requirement, work to pay for cover additional liability insurance in his vehicle and the standard RAC rate per mile.

That should stop them from requiring him to do this. If not

I’d say no just on the part about not being asked first, what if he needs to run errands, see friends, go to the gym etc, now he can’t as he has a passenger, i don’t drive and would never apply for a job I couldn’t get to.

He isn’t a pushover honestly!
**
I am making him sound like one though.. He took the lad because he didn’t want to drop everyone in it at the last minute, what is wrong with that?

Getting up out of bed when you’ve got D&V and are off work sick and driving to someone’s house to pick them up then drop them to work before returning home ill to bed is the definition of a pushover!

So if do had the work van perm would he be happy doing it @Workinghardeveryday

is it the dirt and petrol expense in own car that puts him off

I would say to boss that when car is back he won’t be able to give a lift

but going to pick him up when ill was insane and tbh a good excuse to show boss it won’t always work

a moped sounds good

and if he ends up doing it then he picks up at end of road

dh picks his labourer up as doesn’t drive

he used to pick him up from home and battle high street traffic till I said why didn’t he pick him up half way along high street where can turn easily

and labourer walks there

tho dh often has to wait 5/10m for him and pisses him off

if you are getting a lift you are ready and waiting

I wouldn't want to give someone a lift.

I don't like to be reliant on people and don't want them reliant on me either.

I also like my own space (especially in the morning)!

Haven’t RTFT but which of them is going to decide when their joint holidays are?

I don’t drive (which is VERY odd where I live in the US) and I think this is extremely cheeky, even more so that this lad was told this before he even took the job!

Perhaps the new person isn’t too keen on this arrangement either! Is it a young apprentice though needing this help. This new person definitely needs a plan B to get to work.