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Original poster

Silent sex

112 replies

SoSobored · 23/09/2022 19:53

I'm dating someone new, we've done everything up to PIV sex. They seem to be having a good time, but honestly he is so totally silent when we do anything.

It's so weird. I make a normal amount of noise, but it's starting to make me feel a bit self conscious.

Does anyone have any tips/advice?

OP posts:
PrettyPrim · 24/09/2022 08:53

@Ameanstreakamilewide oh I miss Sam. She had the best lines!

queenMab99 · 24/09/2022 09:05

This made me feel guilty! It may be my exh, I told him to stop talking like John Motson (football commentator from the 70s, renowned for his sheepskin jacket.) as he was giving a running commentary on his actions while we were having sex.
To be fair, he was cheating on me at that time, and this was a new development in our relationship, which had obviously been popular with the other woman. He was completely silent for the very few times we had sex after that.
Not likely though as he is now in his 70s and projecting kindly old grandad vibes towards young women, in a warped kind of way.

Sunnytwobridges · 24/09/2022 09:32

My ex was silent til he was about to finish off. I hated it. The best sex I e had was with men that made some sounds which let me know they were into it.

StarlightLady · 24/09/2022 09:48

You want the right balance between the sound if enjoyment against the stupid noises from porn films.

As a slight aside, it reminds me of a camping trip many years ago. There was a German couple in a tent nearby. They used to get down to it regularly around 11:00 pm each night and were so loud. People in other tents used to clap and cheer as she finished 😂! They used to cycle everyday. It made me consider treating myself to a bike.

gogohmm · 24/09/2022 09:55

Dp is definitely not quiet. I'm forever telling him shush as dsd is above (she's an adult but still) Blush. Hes her dad and she's here full time

BowiesJumper · 24/09/2022 10:05

I had a boyfriend like this. Was a bit off putting. Not even a mmm or heavy breathing or a gasp or anything. Like, gimme SOMETHING.

WildFlowerBees · 24/09/2022 10:06

I once had a relationship with a man who was so over the top it out me off him completely. He'd be jabbing away saying things like 'oh honey you feel so good, oh yeah that's good, oh yeah honey, do you like that?'

Me 😳🤫 he was awful needed a map and even then had it upside down.

So sometimes quiet isn't always awful, dh is the right amount of noise.

TangoTizer · 24/09/2022 10:06

I’ll take silent over running commentary any day.

Homewardbound2022 · 24/09/2022 10:17

vegang · 24/09/2022 07:44

Yep, so weird and totally ruined it for me which is a shame because he was a great shag but I couldn't see him again after the roaring 😆

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Just reminded me of my upstairs neighbour.
He emits this long and very loud growling animal noise, like a bear tearing into some juicy prey. I was surprised when I first saw him coming out of his garage one day, a miserable looking wretch wearing a crossover canvas bag.

EmmaH2022 · 24/09/2022 12:14

ShirleyJackson · 24/09/2022 08:27

I’d be worried he’d died.

Oh, this wins the thread 😂😂😂

Hillrunning · 24/09/2022 15:20

Paigeycakey · 24/09/2022 06:54

Going from noisy to quiet shouldn't be the way you commicate during sex. I think most people have their positions.... and most of us would voice "can we swop positions" or whatever.

It doesn't mean we can't commicate it just means some people are genuinely having a good time quietly.

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I did mean to suggest that going from noise to quiet was a method to communicate. That would be really odd. I meant using words to communicate. You say that you do talk when you want a change so that not being silent is it?

I was asking thoes who claim to be silent, how they communicate.

LadyAstor · 24/09/2022 15:27

This would put me right off. I went out with someone once who was deadly quiet throughout the deed - nothing - no ooh, no ahh, no grunts of appreciation or satisfaction - nothing. Acted like he was there under sufferance. Such a turn-off.

Flangelasashes · 24/09/2022 16:24

If a man said to me any of the following in a panting/growly/breathless/croaky voice, I would dismount immediately and go and empty the dishwasher.

Oh Baby you feel so good.
I'm, I'm, I'm COMIN!
Oh Jeesus, Oh Jeesus!
You love that don't you, you dooooooooooooooooooooo!
Stick yer finger up my arse.
How much do you want it, tell me, tell me!
Here we goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Eeeh Eeehhh Ehhhhhhh Eh Eh Eh Eh FUUUUUUUCK!
Yeehaw!
You are so sexy/tasty/gorgeous/edible/delicious/dirty/wet/horny/fuckable.

I will take selectively mute rather than a running commentary of cringy one liners. Complete and utter dry vagina shrivel nonsense.

Nope.

lookeelikee · 24/09/2022 16:24

Stick your finger up his arse. I'm guessing you'll get a reaction even if it's a sharp intake of breath :)

Flangelasashes · 24/09/2022 16:27

lookeelikee · 24/09/2022 16:24

Stick your finger up his arse. I'm guessing you'll get a reaction even if it's a sharp intake of breath :)

😂

ChimChimeny · 24/09/2022 16:34

As long as he seems to be enjoying himself then what is the problem?

But how can.you tell.If someone is silent? I haven't slept with anyone silent thank goodness, I'd find it really.off putting. DH and I don't sound like we're in porn But we definitely know we're enjoying ourselves and we get the orgasm warning

Flangelasashes · 24/09/2022 16:38

ChimChimeny · 24/09/2022 16:34

As long as he seems to be enjoying himself then what is the problem?

But how can.you tell.If someone is silent? I haven't slept with anyone silent thank goodness, I'd find it really.off putting. DH and I don't sound like we're in porn But we definitely know we're enjoying ourselves and we get the orgasm warning

Why do you need to announce an orgasm? Unless you were doing it very wrong surely it would be obvious.

SylvanianFrenemies · 24/09/2022 16:38

EmmaH2022 · 23/09/2022 21:53

I never understood how much sex he was having in prison!

creepy stalker though.

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He was wanking.

ShirleyJackson · 24/09/2022 16:48

we get the orgasm warning

That’s a bit of the Shipping Forecast I’ve never heard.

swimlyn · 24/09/2022 17:17

lookeelikee · 24/09/2022 16:24

Stick your finger up his arse. I'm guessing you'll get a reaction even if it's a sharp intake of breath :)

The volume of his response will be dependent on the length of your nails, I'd guess...

dubyalass · 24/09/2022 17:33

ShirleyJackson · 24/09/2022 16:48

we get the orgasm warning

That’s a bit of the Shipping Forecast I’ve never heard.

😂😂😂

It's been a long time since my last shag but I don't recall any silent partners. I like a bit of dirty talk and some moaning otherwise it all just feels a bit mechanical - I've got my vibrator for that!

KiraKiraHikaru · 24/09/2022 17:33

I appreciate the “I’m gonna cum” announcement so I can close my eyes and not have to see his cum face 🤣

Stichintimesavesstapling · 24/09/2022 17:37

Dh is silent and it's so demoralizing especially with me on top.

ChimChimeny · 24/09/2022 18:10

Flangelasashes · 24/09/2022 16:38

Why do you need to announce an orgasm? Unless you were doing it very wrong surely it would be obvious.

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As PP said if she's bouncing away on top and doesn't realise he's come until he goes soft

ChimChimeny · 24/09/2022 18:11

ChimChimeny · 24/09/2022 18:10

As PP said if she's bouncing away on top and doesn't realise he's come until he goes soft

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and surely it's just good manners if you are giving a blow job