Moderate thread for moderates (re the queen)

[TheSpottedZebra]

This is a moderate thread for moderate people who aren't mad keen royalists but also aren't wishing the royals harm either.

For those who don't post mawkish shite but also don't post hateful things.

For those who spent hours watching the news but then went to the loo at 6.30, and for those who stayed watching the news. Or watched no news.

For those who are passed off at Eastenders is cancelled, and for those not that bothered.

Come gather here, air your petty gripes but not your mean ones. Have a gossip, or talk about your dinner.

I actually think he might come out with a few radical changes that he'd never have referred to whilst the queen was alive. He's had decades to think it through, he must know there's a groundswell for change and to be fair he was well ahead of the mainstream on stuff like organic farming, knocking down old buildings etc. Not that I care much, but I do kinda hope he comes out sort of Blue Peter style with 'here's one I prepared earlier..'

I am feeling a bit sorry for the cashier to whom I said at lunchtime 'oh! the Queen is unwell' when my watch beeped and informed me this was the case. Slight understatement.

Not sad at her passing - she had good innings, there's often so much pain at the end - if you manage to avoid that you've done ok! Dreading the near-constant coverage - particularly listening to politicians and celebrities waxing on - saying the same stuff about her over and over again.
I know a few people who have met Charles and they have been remarkably impressed with how engaging he was and how seemingly interested he was in their lives - Camila was a big hit too (and these were not fans of the RF. I think he's quietly charming in his own way, he'll be fine. I do get utterly fed up with all the hate that gets thrown around by supposed Royal Fans - it can be absolutely vile, they seem completely over-invested - it's not healthy.

Agreed @RightDressingDown relatively impartially I can say I quite like Charles in some ways ( at least in how I perceive him). I'm 100% not generally a 'Royal fan' but gobsmacked at the vitriol directed at members of the RF by those claiming to be fans ( ie Harry)
The exception for me is Andrew - regardless of unproven allegations he maintained a friendship with a known convicted abuser of young girls. That is indefensible

It occurred to me last night that she was never 'able' to admit to any pain, even in dying and death. I know a lot of it is related to platitudes we say about dying (comfortable, peaceful) and it and it also to do with her 'dignity' but it seems crazy that until her final hours no one could admit she'd been in pain.*

You don't get to late 90s without lots of pain. Yet her issues were always to do with 'mobility'. There's probably an inequality thing in there somewhere that makes me a bit angry. That we laud her long life whist letting other old people die on the floor hoping for an ambulance.

• and when Nicholas Witchell did say out loud that she'd probably had a fall a year ago, had painful gout and maybe had cancer it seemed almost a mic drop moment.

Agree we were never allowed to see or know of any weakness in her.
I wonder if that was her own decision?

I also thought randomly today, I wonder if people having baby girls yesterday and today might give the middle name Elizabeth? It makes quite a nice middle name i think.

I think this is the thread for me. I think the monarchy is an outdated institution that we need to get rid of, but the Queen herself was a dedicated, gracious, hard-working woman who represented the country well. I feel for her family, of course.

It feels like a big change for her to die, but at 96 it is hardly a 'shock'.

I think dropping off flowers/congregating for the funeral is not for me but I understand people who want to be part of big events, and I will probably watch the funeral on TV.

I also think one day of mourning for the funeral of our head of state is appropriate, but am actually really annoyed that lots of local events over the next 10 days are being cancelled (not in London or involving policing, so not for practical reasons). I don't get to spend weeks at home in 'mourning' when close family members die, so I'm certainly not doing it for someone I've never met. I think with covid etc I just feel that we've had enough cancellations, and that an old woman's inevitable death just doesn't justify so much stopping. Many people live lives of service to others and we don't stop for them all.

So a real mixed bag of feelings.

Yes, I feel so ambivalent about it all. I am a republican by instinct, but I also love history and find the whole institution of the RF weirdly fascinating (not the Harry & Meghan tabloid rubbish but all the traditions / protocol / pomp & circumstance stuff). Undoubtedly the death of the Queen is a huge moment in history and I genuinely believe that it will have more of an impact on the 'national psyche' than we might be aware of now. The country was wobbly and uncertain before yesterday; I think this will only shake things up more. I will admit that I found, unexpectedly, I had a lump in my throat yesterday when the news came through.

On the other hand, I loathe the mawkishness that will undoubtedly prevail and I do think 10 days of national mourning is excessive. I'm currently watching the crowds greeting the King (sounds so odd!) at Buckingham Palace and it just seems slightly grim. People are grabbing at him, trying to kiss him etc - it's all OTT. And I'm not going anywhere near Facebook for weeks!

I'm also quite interested in the whole thing from an historical point of view - I'm 43, so I've never seen a state funeral or a coronation, and I may never see another in my lifetime (although hopefully I will outlive Charles on the basis of probability / expected lifespan, so actually I might be completely wrong - perhaps they're like buses).

(I also learned 'coronated' is a word today.)

I am weirdly far more invested in this than I would ever have thought, as a self-professed lifelong republican.

@HopingNotCoping I agree with you on the mourning period. We're expected to deal with it, grieve and get on with it in a few days when a close family member dies but 10 days for someone we've never met (without minimising her achievements and work through the years).

I put radio 2 on today and had to turn it off, Zoe Balls grating soft voice 'we're here for you' made me irrationally angry.

This is me!
I thought they’d be an announcement at 6 so watched the news and called in DH - watched a bit, had dinner w DS (18) and chatted about the queen a bit.
Did chores, watched Netflix, went to bed 😆
I was listening to the radio this morn while wfh and it was a bit less mawkish than the TV.
i was a bit sad when I heard she’d probably died (around 3pm), but then it was a case of has she or not for about 3 hours!
RIP Queen Elizabeth, she hopefully didn’t suffer, and she lived an amazing life.
it must be hard for Charles who has to do all the King bits while grieving for his mum (mummy).

@AffIt - I’m the same with the historical element. It really is the end of an era.
i was looking intently at the royal family tree this morning thinking wtf is wrong with me 😆I also live in London so it’s tempting to go up into town but it’ll be bonkers (I didn’t for Diana and sort of regret it).

Although I'm not royalist, i dont like the hate shes getting on social media .

Lovely way to go. Quickly, peacefully, and well loved by many.

Bonus points for doing it in a castle.

I’m not British but lived in the UK when they had the funeral for the Queen Mother. I thought, ‘oh well it’s kind of an historical event, I’ll pop off to where the procession passes and check it out..,’

OMG The absolute pageantry and complete and utter over the top bonkers ceremonial display of just….I don’t know if there is even a word for it?! It was really something quite spectacular. I mean, there’s nothing in the world like a British Royalty funeral. That’s for sure.

Think its good they have normal programming on BBC2 today.
I think when Prince Philip died they had the same programmes on 1&2 which in my opinion was just too much.

All the drawings of her walking off hand in hand with Paddington Bear and mawkish pieces of doggerel are giving me a bit of rage. I guess I'm not a sentimental sort of person, unless its part of my own personal history.

I keep reminding myself that others are genuinely upset and consoling themselves amd that I probably am equally baffling to them.

We've had an end-of-a-long/good-life bereavement this summer, with awkward timing and it was a case of wipe the tears, plough on, prepare and do what must be done. Sad but not tragic.

The Queen has had a "good" ending, both able to fulfil her duty admirably to the end, but without much grief for potential life ahead. While clearly not in a good state of health in Tuesday's photos, she still had a twinkle in her eye and a warm smile.

The end of an era, a continuous presence in public life, and an incredibly devoted public servant is sad. There is a place for placing of flowers, books of condolence and reflection, but the mawkish poetry, and twee art is overkill. Same to ongoing rolling news coverage of not-much and filling with the repetitive soundbites of people hanging around palaces.

There is balance to be had in chance to reflect and pay respects and being able to carry out regular life, and overzealous performance grief.
Feeling jaded about life being comandeered and controlled so much in the past couple of years is not helping when you recognise the repeat of social behaviours (and twee art!)

Well I hate poetry and naffness but it takes all sorts and it's easy to snooze it - I've a weakness for the Queen's pets personally.

Does anyone know when there will be normal news on?
I would have expected some other news stories today maybe?

Apparently the funeral will be a bank holiday according to the Metro and looking to be 19th. So that's months of waiting for a hospital appointment wasted as that's the day we finally have one. I'm happy for it all to rumble on in the background and people can enjoy the mutual mourning but I resent my life being impacted by the death of someone who had no meaning, positive or negative, to my life.

I will watch quite a lot of the Royal stuff because I want to but I was pleased to see that the BBC didn't put it on all of their channels. Lesson learned, BBC?

Even if 'coronated' is a word, I would say 'crowned'.

Yes the coverage after Prince Philip died was completely OTT. Enforced mourning, it was like something from North Korea! I was one of those who put in a complaint to the BBC. I think that's why there are normal programmes showing still now. I think that's the BBC modifying their approach based on the reaction from the public they got then.

But actually I wouldn't have minded if they'd done that this time around, with the death of the Queen. She was obviously much more important than her late husband and its a far more historically significant moment. The BBC messed it up imo, got it the wrong way round.

Yep, even if you're fairly interested i imagine most people might want to watch something else at some point!

I think they must have taken note of the response to the coverage when Prince Phillip died.

I surprised myself by shedding a few tears when the announcement came. It is the end of an era, and familiarity made you feel like HM was your Grandma even though or course she wasn't and she made very sure that the general public didn't know her or her true opinions. I think she saw that as part of the role, whereas Charles clearly doesn't. She certainly did her duty, as she saw it and I suppose that's something to admire.

I am getting a bit sick of the tide of sycophancy now though. Any dissenting voices are just not heard from and we are all being told how 'we' all feel. I don't like that at all, it feels very repressive. Maybe this will change after the funeral.

We are also all being brainwashed to think how lovely Camilla is. No she isn't. 25 years ago she was hated in the UK, maybe that was OTT but there were good reasons for it. How quickly people forget.