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Original poster

If you met your DH very young, for example under age 20

212 replies

Summerbreeze81 · 25/07/2022 20:56

If you met your DH very young, say under 20, did the relationship last?

Do you feel happy that you always had security or companionship, or do you feel you missed out on dating / sex / other life experience?

I got talking to a lady today who met her husband during uni Freshers week at age 18 and it got me thinking. I personally met my DH at 30 so I can’t imagine what being in a relationship with the same person since 18 must be like. But then obviously I never met someone I wanted to spend my life with at age 18, and if I’d settled down with any of the men I’d dated back then it would have been a disaster!

I’m now early 40s for context.

OP posts:

Heatstrokeunsteady · 26/07/2022 16:39

Met as teens, split up got back together married for decades..

user1498572889 · 26/07/2022 16:41

Met my husband when I was 16. Still together 41 years later.

savehannah · 26/07/2022 16:43

Met at 16, officially together since 18, one previous sexual relationship each. Married for 20 years and still happy together.

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Dating General relationships

Ponderingwindow · 26/07/2022 16:44

I met DH at 18 and we did date for a bit at university, but we didn’t really get together until we were 30. I was far too immature to know what I needed out of a long term relationship when we tried the first time.

classixx · 04/04/2025 20:32

i met my now husband at the age of 16 and he was 20.

we didn’t start dating until i was 18 (bc i had no interest in dating in general- thought it was a waste of time)
however- we rekindled our relationship when i was 18.
got married when i was 26 and he was 30
lived together for 9 years
(we are now 29 & 33)
no regrets at all. this man is amazing.
how did i know he was “ the one”

i think this is not something that has a direct answer … everyone’s needs, wants, desires are different and are met differently by various individuals.
personally for me- i liked him because he is willing to grow and learn new things. he’s passionate about things , a hard working man, is reliable, and dependable, etc.
He also makes me feel seen and special (ex. building me a shoe rack for my shoes, or a taekwondo belt rack; or even just making me a “period box” when i’m on my period full of comforting things, etc)

i think people nowadays are so pressed on finding perfect people who meet all of their requirements/ check off list… that they neglect to accept people for who they are and allow that growth to happen… people are not linear .. we ebb and flow. so to have expectations of a person you just met… may not be consistent through the entire relationship..

do i feel like i “missed out” on other relationships?
no. because to me- life isn’t just about relationships: it’s about all experiences as a whole- it doesn’t matter who i am with: because i still have a desire for life outside of that relationship. i don’t care that i only slept with one person. i don’t care that ive only been with one person through and through- the thought of “missing out” doesn’t even come across my mind.

TrickyD · 04/04/2025 20:43

Met DH when he was 16 and I was 23. Married at 20 and 27. We have been married for 54 years.

ThisPinkBee · 04/04/2025 20:45

If I ever had my life again lol I would love to have met my partner very young. I did have an amazing boyfriend but broke up with him as my mum was drinking and I felt I had to deal with that. I think we were right but I wasn't confident. I broke his heart then he snogged a girl in front of me and it was like my gut was ripped out. I think growing up together would be special.

godmum56 · 04/04/2025 21:30

met DH when I was 14 and he was 17. It was strictly platonic until I was 17 and we married when I was 21. he died 12 years ago. I don't feel I missed out on anything, we were soulmates.

EcoCustard · 04/04/2025 22:13

I met DH at 19, married at 21. We are still together 23 years later. We did some amazing stuff before we had kids 10years ago and, still do stuff & plans for lots more. I don’t feel like I’ve missed out anything, still happy.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 05/04/2025 09:17

Met at uni when I was 19 or 20, married at 25, but in between were apart for long stretches because of work etc.
Married for a VERY long time now!

I had dated other people during the ‘in between’ times, and had an offer! - but knew I’d never want to marry anyone else

LlynTegid · 05/04/2025 09:21

I don't know what prompted the revival of this thread. Not in the same position, but interested and heartwarming to read those who have contributed.

superplumb · 05/04/2025 11:36