If you met your DH very young, for example under age 20

[Summerbreeze81]

If you met your DH very young, say under 20, did the relationship last?

Do you feel happy that you always had security or companionship, or do you feel you missed out on dating / sex / other life experience?

I got talking to a lady today who met her husband during uni Freshers week at age 18 and it got me thinking. I personally met my DH at 30 so I can’t imagine what being in a relationship with the same person since 18 must be like. But then obviously I never met someone I wanted to spend my life with at age 18, and if I’d settled down with any of the men I’d dated back then it would have been a disaster!

I’m now early 40s for context.

Known DH since we were 12 and started dated at 13, we have been been together 15 years now, married for 5 and with amazing DC. We are very much still in love and really are the best of friends. I think growing up together has made us how close we are today. I definitely don't feel like I've missed out by not dating/having other boyfriends as I love the life we have built together and I know he's the love of my life.

met at uni, still together 20 years later. Ups and downs, but huge ups and quite shallow downs. He’s a great human being who thinks I’m a great human being.

Met at 17, been together since. We are 31 now, married 7 years, 2 kids.
Never looked back

Met at 19. 30th anniversary next week. There have been some highs and lows but we rub along quite nicely, even now.

Met DH at 18. Engaged at 19. Been together 32 years.
2 now adult kids and became grandparents for the first time this year.
We are very happy with our lot

Met age 18 and became good friends, at that point we were both in other relationships. Got together age 19/20 and married at 22. Still together after 25+ years. We did some growing up together but happily we’ve grown together, not apart.

I completely get what you mean about the potential disaster of settling with any of the guys you knew at 18 though. I only had 2 boyfriends before DH but for very different reasons it would have been a bad idea to end up with either of them long term. I don’t believe in the concept of ‘the one’ but I still think I was lucky to meet DH so young, I certainly didn’t expect to.

Met dh at sixth form when I was 17 and he was 18. Married with two kids and he’s just turned 50 (me 9 months shy of it). Can honestly say he’s my best friend still and happily we still fancy each other. Went to different unis and managed the long distance thing. We have friends from uni who met at exactly the same age and are still married too.

I have a three friends who met their husbands at school when they were 15/16 (or even earlier) and are still happily together in their 40s. Also know a number of couples who met at uni aged 18 /19 and also all still happily married in their 40s. I actually only know one person my age whose marriage ended in divorce and they met in their 20s.

I was 21, it’s been 12 years and I’m happy.

Met on a camp when I was 16 and him 17. Became friends-ish but didn't really stay in contact as lived in different cities.

Reconnected at a mutual friend's birthday 5 years later. Was engaged (informally) at 6 weeks and formally at 6months. Married 12m later and that's 18 years ago.

We've had some rough patches, where one has seemingly matured sooner. But I don't wish I'd had a different arc. As someone said above, our entire adult lives have been as a team. Sometimes as a dysfunctional one, but mostly not.

We met in senior school, so 11, we were best friends through most of it and started dating late teens. Still together and married now 10 years in our 30s.

I'm in my 50s and met and moved in with my DH at 18. I had quite a bit of fun before meeting my dh (plus a bit of an overlap🤦🏻‍♀️) and have never felt I missed out. I think I'd have enjoyed living on my own too but my DH and I have never been a joined-at-the-hip type of couple.

I liked meeting him early as it meant we had a lot of time traveling and enjoying ourselves before having kids.

I was 14, he was 16. I wasn't interested in boys as I had three older brothers. We just clicked. Went out together for 10 years before we got married and will celebrate our 40th wedding anniversary next year. Had a few ups & downs, but mainly ups. Wouldn't trade him in and he feels the same about me. We've got 2 adult daughters who we like and who like us too 😀
We must like a settled life, as we're still friends with the people we hung out with as teenagers. I like that we basically grew up together and have the same memories as teenagers in the 70s - what a blast that was! I don't feel that we missed out on anything - we've done lots of travelling and both have good jobs.
My mum treats him just the same as my brothers, as do my other siblings.

We met in sixth form and will be celebrating our 33rd anniversary in a few months time. Still in love and fancy each other. Like every couple we’ve had some tough times but definitely no regrets. I’ve never wished I had more dating experiences or sexual partners, as I’ve always enjoyed being with him.

its lovely to hear from others who met their other halves when they were young and never dated other people or wanted to. It never bothered me but I am used to being thought of as "odd" when the subject of old boyfriends comes up.

19 here. End of first year at university. We’ve grown up together really. Many ups and downs along the way, a couple of short-lived break-ups in the early years. I don’t think we’re particularly happily married but we seem to be equally committed to making it work. We have bad patches but we know deep down it’ll right itself and it always does. We just have so much history and deep connection that I’m sure we’ll go the distance. Which isn’t to say that I don’t sometimes think we both missed out on relationship experience. I’m risk averse and probably should have made on of our temporary break-ups permanent but I was afraid and insecure. In truth we’d probably both have been happier with someone else. He was my first love and the thought of giving that up was terrifying. We’ve always been very drawn fo each other. We’re quite different yet have the same values. He is a wonderful father and takes good care of me. He still makes me laugh. He’s has good morals. I am fortunate. Not madly in love but I doubt he is either!

Met at 17, married at 21, October is our 32nd wedding anniversary

he is a good man…17 year old me did good 😀 (at picking him…not at doing A levels which he completely distracted me from, that and my laziness which is the reason he tells people we haven’t divorced yet 🤔)

My Mother was friends with a couple who met at school when they were 14. They were still together in their late seventies and happy. DH great aunt and uncle were absolute sweethearts who had met as teenagers and lived till their early nineties. At their 70 wedding anniversary he bought her an exact replica of her wedding bouquet. I always remember the last time we saw them, we made the tea together and when she passed him a cup he gave her the most beautiful smile when he thanked her. They were just lovely people.

I know two couples who are both around 30 through my hobby both together since first year of University. Both suited to each other very well.

I don’t understand this missing out on life angle. I have hardly ever seen or met any man I could imagine even kissing let alone the rest, wish I had met DH as a teen.

I was 17 when I met dh, we married when I was 23 and had our 25th wedding anniversary this year.

It's not always been easy, but we both love and respect each other so have worked through issues over time.

I was 21 and he was 18. Still together 20 years later and got married last year!

We met when we were both sixteen. We got married at 17 and still together 42 years later.

I met my first husband when I was 16, married at 21 and we then grew apart gradually until we divorced when I was 38. Helped by his constant desire to drink beer and play computer games 24/7 ignoring his daughter.

Now with #2 and happily so for the last 15 years.

Met my DH when I was 17 and he was 16, we were friends for some time, then started dating in our early 20s. Married in our mid twenties - we are celebrating our Silver Wedding Anniversary today.

DH's brother met his wife when they were 12, 'dated' at that age, married at 16 and are still married now, 34 years later

I MET my now DH when I was 17. We got together when I was 18. We’ve been together (very happily) for 35 years!

I met my ex at 18, had first DD at 24, got married at 26, pregnant with second dd at 28 and then we split up.