You’re a burglar, BUT you can only steal…

[MzHz]

… things that mildly inconvenience your victim.

what are you taking?

I’m stealing the fronts to all your freezer drawers, and the clips closing your packs of open frozen veg…

I saw this on FB and the comments were hilarious. I’m sure Vipers can do waaaay better!

over to you!

Lighthearted, btw. Just in case the heat gets to anyone and it’s not obvious

The dustpan but not the brush
The mop bucket but not the mop
3/4 of the pegs
Tin opener and all tins with ring pulls

Chargers, or at least the cable, and leave the plug. Tupperware - that would screw us over in this house. The Philips Hue hub and leave the lights on.

Vipers you’re doing us all proud! These are evil!

You've already done this in my house haven't you?

Those saying scissors, pillow cases and freezer drawer fronts too.

Although the freezer drawer front was DPs hamfisted mate who's known for breaking things due to not knowing his own strength.

We've put up with a frontless freezer section for over 20 years because I didn't want to pay £7 for a tiny bit of plastic to fix it. If I'd have known it was the fridge freezer that would live forever, I would have spent the money.

I'd take a random spice from your spice cupboard/drawer that you won't notice is missing until you've started a recipe that needs it.

Has anyone mentioned taking all the sink and bath plugs?

The smoke alarm reset button

The window keys
The lightbulbs
The bin
All the tea towels
The sugar bowl

Tbf… the magpies stole my pegs… I saw them flying off with them.

no. I don’t live on craggy island

You’ve actually already done this in my house haven’t you?

Something that has just one job but nothing else can do it.
Pencil sharpener
Q tips
Melon baller
Toilet brush (or is that going too far)?

The bin bags! Genius!

The bit on the fan that stops it spinning around so that you only actually get the benefit of the fan for a few seconds before it moves again.

All the cutlery apart from the chopsticks

The bottle opener

You lot would have done well in the Stasi!

All the best cups for drinking tea out of so you need to drink tea out of designated coffee cups.

Sellotape.
multi-head screwdrivers
condoms (cackles evilly)

Kitchen timer.

Oh now that is really funny. 😂
I would steal the doormat on a rainy day.

Almost every pen. I'd leave 1 black permanent marker that's run out of ink and a pink gel pen

The bath plug

The last page of every book! Mwahahaha

The curtain ring at the end that prevents the curtains pulling right across at the edges and half your curtain hooks.

Nice!

The lid to the bread bin.

Glasses cases (but not the glasses).

The milk.

All hairbrushes and combs

the wheels underneath the plate in the microwave so that every thing is either cold or burnt!
the oven gloves
all the charging cables
one sock out of every pair
a good handful of forks so that you are always slightly short...
the labels to all the cans so when you open them its like roulette
all the shelves out of the oven

Every teaspoon except one, & every mug except one per person.