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Original poster

Things that happened to you that you thought would never happen to someone like you?

486 replies

besentsl · 17/07/2022 10:28

Me… abortion. Thought it happened to other women.

Later on a single parent. Was not at all what I thought I would allow to happen but of course you learn life isn’t like that! Many people said they couldn’t believe it had happened as I’m quite conservative and careful but it did!

Sometimes I don’t recognise me though I am still me. Anyone else experienced this?

OP posts:
WarmJuly · 17/07/2022 14:56

Being front page news worldwide

Having a pregnant teen

Gaining weight. Was underweight for years

Getting skin cancer

Marrying a man who left me for his boyfriend after a few weeks

Having a friend drop down dead in front of me

Irishgene · 17/07/2022 14:59

Having no close friends. I have 1 friend from school but move from the area 10 years ago and its been 22 years since I left school so we're not close anymore. It's very lonely, I always think people don't like me and always feel a bit left out as I think I come across as a bit awkward.

ReneBumsWombats · 17/07/2022 15:01

MRSAHILL · 17/07/2022 12:24

Losing my beloved parents in my thirties. Getting married and divorced in my early 20s. Adopting a child with severe anger issues. Marrying a man in my 30s who, now in his 50s has changed completely. He is severely mentally ill and our relationship now is carer and patient, but I can't abandon him, I'm trapped in this situation until one of us dies. Having no "proper" marriage in my 50s. Having to give up my job when I've worked all my life. Losing my beautiful home due to financial difficulties caused by dh's illness and living in a tiny house with no money. My life is a constant disappointment.

Why exactly are you trapped? What would happen if you left?

djdkdkddkek · 17/07/2022 15:02

never being loved by my parents or having a normal relationship (my only proper one was ok but the guy was boring)

if I saw me I’d think I was brimming with love in my life because I am a loving person naturally. Never thought I’d be someone who wasn’t loved back

I never thought I’d be brave enough to give up jobs when I’m sick of them and just find another one

i also never thought I’d be a teenage parent (the adhd comment earlier was enlightening) BUT I’m glad I did because I’d not have kids otherwise and i love my son too too too much :)

BarryKentPoet · 17/07/2022 15:04

Got breast cancer at 41.

CloseYourMouthLynn · 17/07/2022 15:05

Lose my brother to cancer at just age 41. I assumed we would grow old together.

BroomHandledMouser · 17/07/2022 15:09

Being still very happily married to my childhood sweetheart. We get on so well and laugh so much every day ❤️ We met when I was 15 and I’m now 38.

Owning a successful business at 27

Attempting suicide and being found in the nick of time by DH. The look on his face will haunt me forever.

AutumnOcean · 17/07/2022 15:09

Good:
I'm about to complete my degree. I'll be the first in my family to do so.
My husband and I own a home. I spent my first year of life living in a trailerpark.
I was able to have 2 children after struggling with a chronic illness affecting fertility for most of my life.

Bad:
Being diagnosed with that chronic illness.
Being sexually assaulted.

hashbrownsandwich · 17/07/2022 15:10

Divorce. But then again, at the time it did happen, I never thought I would go on to have a decent marriage, which I now have with DH.

Spanielsarepainless · 17/07/2022 15:18

Divorce.

MrsMcisaCt · 17/07/2022 15:31

Having a man actually find me attractive. I was told how ugly I was from a very young age, by strangers, family and friends. Then I met a man when I was 38 who loves me and finds me attractive. Felt like a miracle to me. We've been together 12 years now and he is a wonderful, caring man.

CharlotteSt · 17/07/2022 15:31

LoudingVoice · 17/07/2022 10:29

Not being able to have kids, I’d never given it much thought and assumed it would just happen.

Failed ivf and miscarriages later I’m coming to terms with it just not happening.

Me too. My siblings have 3-4 children each. Sometimes I can't believe I couldn't do it.

But life is good 🙂

oohyoudevilyou · 17/07/2022 15:34

That I'd be pet-less: I've always loved dogs and had at least one at all times. All changed when our usually calm, well behaved westie-cross just jumped up and bit my niece on the cheek. I witnessed it and it was random and unprovoked. Vet conrirmed no underlying health issues with the dog and we kept him another 2 years (kept him away from kids) until he died but will never have a dog again whilst there are children in my life.

notprincehamlet · 17/07/2022 15:35

Homelessness

Comedycook · 17/07/2022 15:36

Being happy. I had a miserable childhood in many ways and an awful time in my teens and early twenties with an alcoholic father. I was never really happy. I knew others were but couldn't imagine what life was like without horrendous stress and problems all the time. It was a revelation.

PinkStarAtNight · 17/07/2022 15:37

Being able to wear contact lenses

Falling unrequitedly in love with my uni flatmate (such a cliche that I thought wasn't real)

Covid/lockdown

Graduating uni and NOT getting a job straight away, then having to work in shitty call centre jobs instead of a graduate job

Abortion here too - I also thought it was just stupid people, and also was sure that I didn't agree with abortion and would never do it. But I just wasn't able to go through with it at that time in my life.

Severe mental illness to the point of not being able to function sometimes

Gaining three stone in the space of two years

HazelBite · 17/07/2022 15:41

I am 70 and always imagined that by this age I would be a grandmother, I have 4 DC's all boys (aged mid 30's to early 40's) and although the two youngest are in stable committed relationships one DIL wants no DC;s and the other is unable to. Oldest DS, and his exW tried to adopt (2 Dc's from a very troubled background) it ended with the previously good and happy relationship breaking down after SS removed the DC's. And the remaining DS is desperate to become a Dad and just wants to settle down with that someone special, unfortunately none of his LTRs have worked out for him.
I am the only one in my social circle who doesn't have any grandchildren.
I never voice my disapointment to my ds's

nacno · 17/07/2022 15:41

Attempted murder, grievous bodily harm, rape, 2 counts of arson. Sent the bastard to prison but he's out now and despite being on the Interpol files, is happily on Tinder, Bumble and has paid someone to wash his internet searches. Be very careful who you date. That charming, erudite, piano playing God's gift might just be him.

Lomex · 17/07/2022 15:42

Having a close family member die in a car accident (in a particularly shocking way) and seeing his face looking at me from the news websites.

Having a son who struggles with severe anxiety and mental health issues. I'm extremely laid back and come from a large family where I always felt comfortable being surrounded by good humoured banter, so it's a shock that my son is hugely sensitive and struggles massively with everyday life. (I love him exactly how he is though and he's an incredible kid.)

nacno · 17/07/2022 15:43

nacno · 17/07/2022 15:41

Attempted murder, grievous bodily harm, rape, 2 counts of arson. Sent the bastard to prison but he's out now and despite being on the Interpol files, is happily on Tinder, Bumble and has paid someone to wash his internet searches. Be very careful who you date. That charming, erudite, piano playing God's gift might just be him.

Adding that I'm reasonably bright, professional, attractive, confident, careful, blah, blah, blah. And it still happened to me...

CloseYourMouthLynn · 17/07/2022 15:46

Oh and having alcoholic parents. I've normalised a lot of their behaviour over the years, but now my brother has died and it's just me shouldering the burden I can't facilitate them anymore.
On the plus side, I never thought I was good or worthy enough to get married to a nice man, or have kids and I am lucky to have both.

icelollycraving · 17/07/2022 15:48

I am a confident capable woman, but married a difficult man who whilst not physically hurting me, does so in many other less tangible ways.
Always thought I’d be very such and/or famous, I’m not.

icelollycraving · 17/07/2022 15:50

Also entirely losing my sex drive. Can’t believe that.

stargirl1701 · 17/07/2022 15:54

Depression.

I had DD1 at 36 and I've never recovered. I was totally fine up until then.

WakeyCakeyHeart · 17/07/2022 15:55

Cancer, and an unusual one given the known risk factors

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