Things that happened to you that you thought would never happen to someone like you?

[besentsl]

Me… abortion. Thought it happened to other women.

Later on a single parent. Was not at all what I thought I would allow to happen but of course you learn life isn’t like that! Many people said they couldn’t believe it had happened as I’m quite conservative and careful but it did!

Sometimes I don’t recognise me though I am still me. Anyone else experienced this?

I feel your pain. I never dreamed that one of my three children would grow up and cut me out of his life. I loved having my children, doing lovely things with them. They were so happy as children. When I divorced his father, he cut me out of his life. He was in his 20s! One of my daughters (who was also in her 20s) went low contact because apparently, it’s easier for her to maintain a relationship with her brother and father that way 🤷‍♀️

On a positive note though, I met the love of my life aged 49 after being married to totally the wrong man for 30 years.

Jilted at the alter (well ten days before hand).

had a baby at the height of lockdown

Being cheated on, getting divorced (tried to avoid it to my own detriment), living almost half of my life abroad, facing international custody battle, owning a dog (I'm a cat person), loosing my mum so early, never having a proper career (thought I'd figure it out some day), being single in my forties

Have a happy family with a husband who loves me. I mean if your own mother doesn’t love you and hits you every day, you must be unloveable right? Having never been hugged or kissed EVER I didn’t think I could give affection to anyone else. I was barely out of my teens when I met my husband and everyone told me it wouldn’t last. We’ve just celebrated 33 years together and he tells me everyday that he loves me because he knows I need to hear it and I still love him with a passion I’d never have thought possible.
We have two successful children and one grandchild.
Having always lived in council properties, I never dreamed I would have my own house with the mortgage paid off by the time I was 45 and enough money in the bank not to have to worry about the bills.

@LadyPenelope68 This is heart breaking . I M sending you so much love.

Oh I’m so sorry to read this x

I wish you the very best for your treatment and your future.

Being widowed at 30 with a newborn DS.

Having that same now teen DS attempt suicide,

These I will never recover from.

On a happier note, being someone who exercises regularly.

So sorry to hear this, happened to us too, she vanished for some years. She does contact me now but only when she need something - MH problems, drugs, really horrible friends who take advantage of her.
I'm so sad when I think of our joy when she was born, our first child.

Losing my husband at age 59. I thought we would grow old together and it came as a shock when he was diagnosed with cancer and died five days later. A few years later I find myself with another lovely man, in a totally different life and sometimes it hits me square between the eyes how differently things have turned out to the way I expected - and how lucky I am. Some people never find love once - I found it twice. Will never know what I did to deserve it.

Also… never in my life I imagined that I would travel and see all these places I used to dream about.

When I met now my ExHusband we managed to go to Maldives, Japan,Australia, just to mention few of them.
I remembered after we checked in to our hotel in Sydney, we were walking through a park and it suddenly dawned on me - I AM IN AUSTRALIA!! Never ever in my life I thought I would be here. I was crying and laughing at the same time. I just couldn’t believe it, it felt so surreal.
Also Maldives - I cried happy tears that my dream has come true, I’M HERE!!!!

And then we divorced and that’s that.

Accidental pregnancy (as an adult)
Abusive relationship
Single mum
(All of those above with the same man)

Abortion when married with kids

I lost my husband at 59 and although I know first hand the real meaning of grief, I can’t imagine the strength of character it must take to face what you have. You have my respect and my admiration - I do hope things work out.💐

I am so, so sorry. I became a Christian in my mid teens, have lived in different areas and gone to different churches but I've never been to a church which didn't adhere to biblical principles including the fact that God made man and woman. However, I'm absolutely certain that all the churches we've been to would have (and did) welcome people of every kind, faith, sexual orientation, nationality etc. It's so incredibly sad and disappointing that there are churches and church leaders who would rather follow societal trends than biblical teaching.

Sounds very very trivial but picking up a phone and understanding what I'm told.
In Polish.
I'm not Polish. I'm not even slavic.

Last september, I was watching a Polish series, at some point there's a piece of cake, they talk about the cake and I'm like "I want that cake now when is the next flight".
Long story short, went to Poland for the goddamn cake, decided that I loved them both Poland, and the cake.
Then I was a bit tipsy at Xmas, paid for Duolingo to resume learning Russian, finally picked up Polish, and 3 months later, I'm in Poland again, have more of the cake + some of its cake comrades, and go to a museum where there's a phone for visitors to pick up, with a propaganda-based recording and I understood what was said. I looked at the phone and thought "what have I become?"

Fast forward 4 more months and I have a polish tutor, and a plan to take an intensive course for 3 months in Warsaw.
Because of a piece of cake.

You wanna know the best part?
When I was back from my cake-motivated trip to Poland, back from the airport to my flat, I weirdly decided to get off at the bus stop before mine. There a polish shop between that bus stop and mine.
I kid you not: who was there, in the window? The cake. The goddamn cake, taunting me with its silly little cherry and cream swirl.

If one day I have a female dog, it'll be called Wuzetka as a tribute to the cake that has made my life a bit spicier albeit grammatically challenging.

seeing my son take up with a drug addict prostitute GF which shattered my family

W o w women amaze me - you are all wonderful - we go thru so much pain

Getting married and buying a house. 20 years ago I was long term single, an alcoholic, in 20K of debt and living in a bedsit.

Gosh I’m so sorry

Having failed relationship after failed relationship, being a single working parent, losing all my money - twice, having a neuro-divergent only-child (with years of trying for another)... just so not what I expected.... but then.... meeting and marrying an amazing millionaire who worships and adores me. Still getting my head round that one. Bloody hell... could there not have been a somewhere in between "normal" life?!?

I never thought I wouldn't be able to have a second child. Its taken me a long time to come to terms with it.

Being one of five children but the only one abused by my mother. Siblings refuse to acknowledge. Brilliant, dear friend took her life. I trusted social services/homecare team. How wrong I was.

Having two babies in SCBU
Not having 100% unmedicated homebirths (had two ELCS before labour)
Having a degree from an extremely prestigious university but struggling to build a career
Being the least successful professionally out of my siblings
Having kids in hospital
Not living in my hometown/ country of birth
Not having savings
Struggling with motherhood

Having a meaningful relationship
Getting married
Having sons (I'm the third generation of women with two daughters)

I never thought I would end up becoming a mother via donor conception (we used donor eggs and my husband’s sperm). When I first heard about donor egg IVF many years ago I couldn’t imagine why anyone would do it. And now I can’t imagine life without my wonderful little girl, and even if I had a magic wand I wouldn’t change anything about her or the path we took. Life certainly does surprise you.

This thread really makes you think how so many people have or have had utter shit in their lives that you would never know and yet so many remain smart compassionate women, even when life deals you some complete curve balls. .I've seen several situations on here mentioned that I recognise and never mention as I felt it 'was only me ' Hugs to all of us x