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Original poster

What do you regret at your wedding

195 replies

lumothesumo · 16/07/2022 22:32

Wedding tips urgently needed.
What do you regret?
What do you wish you did/didn't do
Any wedding hacks?
I need urgent help

OP posts:
ChagSameachDoreen · 17/07/2022 00:30

prangy · 16/07/2022 22:52

Blimmin hell. The fact you're asking this is alarming. It's a marriage. Not just a wedding.

Oh don't be so daft.

If it were up to some factions on MN, couples would get married in rags behind the bins with takeaway scraps for food.

WireSkills · 17/07/2022 00:35

Not having photos of just me and my parents.

I have some lovely ones of them and lovely photos with them and my DH too but none of just the 3 of us.

SunflowerSmith · 17/07/2022 00:39

Getting a cheap photographer, he was bossy, the photographs aren't lit well and there are none of just me and my parents.
Luckily the videographer was amazing.

Also wish I'd carried on dieting and lost the last stone as my dress was a bit snug on the day and I had a little bulge of back fat which made me feel self conscious.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Weddings
Wildlynx · 17/07/2022 00:43

Having a free bar. Would do that again but limit it to beer and wine only. A few took the piss on the shots. Plus, didn't really bother me what people wore but my MIL gave some odd directions and couple of my DH's family turned up in shorts and hiking boots. If that's what they wanted then fair enough but I suspect it's based on what MIL said so would be tempted to give more indication of style of event (mine was beachy and casual but not roughing it!)

MatildaJayne · 17/07/2022 00:43

My wedding was lovely. The only hitch on the day was that the vintage car broke down!

If I was to do it again I’d have had a gold coloured wedding dress. Was going to but chickened out and had dark cream dupion silk. Very 1990s.

Also I’d marry someone else, obviously. (ExH cheated)

SemperIdem · 17/07/2022 00:45

The groom.

TheresABearOverThere · 17/07/2022 00:53

Getting absolutely smashed, people kept handing me drinks and I was too nervous to eat. Pretty much don't remember anything of the day.

FusionChefGeoff · 17/07/2022 00:57

Should have had mum and dad walk me down the aisle - god knows why I blindly stuck with tradition.

katscamel · 17/07/2022 04:15

The groom
Spending money on things I didn't need to
The groom
The guy we got to make the invitations
The photographer...... but I did learn some photo editing skills.
Did Imention the groom??!!

sarge89 · 17/07/2022 04:24

Nothing I regret as such, but I wish I had bought some comfier shoes to wear in the evening!

We had a lovely outdoor space but because it had rained most of the day it was too wet underfoot to go out without shoes on and my feet were sore from all the dancing and photos.

Havehope21 · 17/07/2022 05:41

Not my wedding but things that went wrong / haven't been great at weddings I have been to:
wedding favours - often pointless and a waste of money (although I noticed you can have LINDOR ones now so that is the exception to the rule!).
bride and groom spending too long on their photos if there is nothing for the guests to do (e.g. no food)
the microphone being handed round at the speeches so people could pass on their good wishes - very bad idea when people have been drinking. The least said about it, the better...

Guineapig123 · 17/07/2022 06:30

we didn’t have the best photographer. She didn’t really like doing formal photos so we only have a couple. Consequently I don’t have any photos of me with my parents, only 1 group one.

PermanentTemporary · 17/07/2022 06:39

Having it on a Saturday, it was an issue for a few guests, should have gone for Sunday

Not doing the stamping on a glass 'Mazel Tov' bit, everyone wanted us to do that and i think they were right

Throwing the bouquet so hard and high that it hit an elderly guest on the head - gentle underarm lob is the way forward imo Blush

Excluding a very close friend from the register office, it was tiny but I shouldn't have done that

Having a sit down meal - buffet and groups of chairs is so much better

It was a great day even so. We did work very hard to minimise the hanging about and that worked.

EspeciallyDeIighted · 17/07/2022 06:49

Not much really. In contrast to many PPs we decided not to video any part of it, it would have made me far too self-conscious and I have never had any regrets over that.

I'm a bit torn about whether a professional photographer was money well spent, the photos were gorgeous, but we never look at them, they've been in a box in the loft for over 20 years, our teen DCs have never seen them.

Evening food was a waste of money, it barely got touched. I've seen that at other weddings too.

Joevanswell · 17/07/2022 06:53

Having such a large number of people (250), I would have preferred a smaller wedding and should have stuck to my guns

MissusPongo · 17/07/2022 06:54

Not doing my own speech.

spending money on pointless things we didn’t care about, like cars. A complete waste.

not doing my own make up

overall though it was brilliant.

mumonthehill · 17/07/2022 06:59

We had a friend do the photos and they were great but I do not have a photo with my mum which I really regret 23 years on.

StClare101 · 17/07/2022 07:05

Registry office ceremony with two witnesses, drinks with them nearby, then dinner just the two of us.

Zero regrets.

Weddings seem a very stressful business these days.

CantStartaFireWithoutaSpark · 17/07/2022 07:23

My wedding is coming up so loving these posts. Thanks OP. Interesting that photos are a common theme, definitely noted.
I attended a wedding course recently where this woman gave really good advice about how to prepare do the day. It really helped me put a plan in place for the day

EspeciallyDeIighted · 17/07/2022 07:23

Oh yes, I didn't book a hairdresser. I was fine doing my own make-up as I don't wear much and wanted to keep it light but I also assumed I could do my own hair ok (it was very short at the time). On the morning I realised it looked very every-day, luckily my aunt who was a hairdresser and staying up the road came to my rescue and gave it a proper dry and shape.

Izadrennan · 17/07/2022 07:31

I really wish we had eloped, we both do, I only ever wanted a tiny wedding but mil invited all her family before we'd even wrote a guest list let alone sent invitations, that was just the tip of the mil iceberg, all that time, effort & money is a big regret for both of us!

14Degrees · 17/07/2022 07:34

I don't think it is done as much now (It was 18 years ago) but having set meals- meat for men and chicken for women then chocolate gataeu for men and fruit for women. Dear GOD I have no idea why i got sucked into that. (The venue said it was normal and I am not from the UK so went with it).

We are having a combined big birthday celebration next year and I am doing a mega buffet (not least because DH is vegetarian now!).

I also felt compelled to have some extended family there as my mother insisted on it for the sake of family relations. Never met 2 of them and have never spoken to them since.

Also we had it at a registry office that could only fit 10 people in it, so we had a further 60 come for the reception. I wish I had explained that to people properly in advance because several people were mortally offended about it and considered they had been snubbed.

Good things we did- had two tables for children and did loads of colouring books, pens, travel board games for them. They loved it.

FrancescaContini · 17/07/2022 07:36

Marrying the wrong man.

MissusPongo · 17/07/2022 07:47

having set meals- meat for men and chicken for women then chocolate gataeu for men and fruit for women.

Wow I have never heard of this! Definitely not normal in the Uk, even 18 years ago. I think there would have been a riot at my wedding if the men had been given chocolate gateau and the women fruit 😂

Electriq · 17/07/2022 07:54

Honestly? Nothing.
It was very low key, no bridesmaids, no first dance, no cutting the cake, none of the silly frills (but I'm not that kind of person) a few speeches, lots of family photos and 2 people getting wed with family and close friends watching.

Location meant I could sneak off from time to time to get a bit of breathing space, and stop smiling to give my cheeks a break ha!

Main thing, enjoy it, its your wedding, it is for you and your SO to get wed, not for you to be panicking about your guests, and what you did or didn't do.

Congrats hope it goes well.