What does upper middle class look like?

[LabradorsLabradorsLabradors]

In conversation with an acquaintance (unrelated, but about the readership of the New Statesman magazine), I was just referred to as upper middle class. I'm not, by the way. Or at least not in the way I think of it. I was a lower middle class child who went to a smart school on an assisted place, did well academically, and married 'up' (I guess quite a long way up), having met DH through mutual friends. It just galls a bit, because I'm proud of my roots (Jewish refugees, tenant farmers, an early Labour MP), and want my kids to be too.

It was a pretty confident assertion, given she doesn't know much about me, and I'm wondering what made her think that. What does upper middle class look like?

It’s the extras above normal middle class.

private schools, birding schools, second home, trust funds, housekeeper rather than weekly cleaner.

I started out quite posh (upper class) and I think I'm migrating downwards.

my family is vair vair posh but I went to a state school. No money. Not a jot of inheritance for me!

I'd say I'm now solid middle class.

Kids in state schools but I do have a Labrador.

And DH and I both work, but no one would call us working class.

My mum.

Drives an expensive electric 4x4, works in a very good job but only very part time and when it suits her (difficult to explain without detail but think along the lines of a consultant, but it's more like a hobby). Very minimal makeup, no cosmetic surgery at all, very slim, her clothing style could be described as casual, untrendy - very unbothered by current fashions, but in a classy way, looks nice. Travels regularly, has a lot of leisure time, a beautiful and well furnished house in the countryside. Spends a lot of time walking, gardening, pottering.

I find her (also upper middle class) friends are either a rather shallow and dull to talk to, or extremely interesting and fascinating to talk to - nowhere in between.

She and her friends also very international in that they've all lived abroad and travelled extensively and often to very unusual places - definitely not holiday destinations! Seems to be another trait.

Thankyou for the clarification !
Just googled - interesting...

The important bit is that private schools in Finland essentially offer no educational advantage to the rich (due to their funding/remit).

I thought that was everybody on mumsnet. Although they all seem to feel that they're on the bones of their arses at the same time.

What does upper middle class look like?

Joanna Lumley, probably.

< sigh >

The Middletons are UPC

I’ve met one or two so I’m no expert. Also watched Grayson Perry’s All in the best possible taste.

Upper middle class: maybe privately educated; understated designer fashion - nothing too loud or obvious; modern car; collects nice wine/single malt whisky; invests money; owns a second property; buys organic and keen to recycle; modern technology is important and owns lots of new high-spec gadgets; pays for children’s regular private music lessons; members of good sports clubs; involved with/owns horses; enjoys eating out at good restaurants; pays for some or all private health/dental care; enjoys the arts; patrons of Glyndebourne/ ROH; probably has a cleaner/gardener/housekeeper/nanny and could accommodate.

I have all of that am definitely not upper middle class.

I'm very much non-working / criminal class and have worked my arse off to raise myself out of the gutters and give my family something better.

MY children now are getting a middle class upbringing, but that doesn't make mine any better.

In my experience, it's only the upper middle classes such as yourself who are obsessed with class and the class system

The rest of us have moved on a bit, society has changed. There are still classes and different sociol-economic groups, but it's a different landscape now

Rich people who have been to private school and label themselves as working class are a bit needy IMO . They want everything, all the money, the privilege, the connections, but also the pat on the back for their humble origins

Upper middle class - have three children (usually blond ones)
Lower middle class - have two children
Working class - number of children varies widely

God you’re that mum with the 50 Labradors on the school run - speaking in a loud rah rah rah voice and got your dad’s old Range Rover 🙌🏽

I think Carole Middleton would be the one to ask! She did all the right things while her children were growing up to give them every single opportunity.

@Anotherdayanotherdisappointment so where would the middle middle get their furniture from?

Do you and/or your husband go to work? Then you're working class

that’s really not the definition of working class. And if you really were proud of being working class you’d not be trying to rewrite the definition of it to even include working royals and the likes of bill gates. Richard Branson or Ed Sheeran.

When they came to Cowes week none of the yacht clubs would not allow them to film on their various sites
Yes the UMC and upwards do things like sailing to a high standard because they like to. In their sailing world if you can keep up - Fine. Welcome aboard.
If you try to buy your way in or exaggerated your achievements - you failed.
W/LMClass DH used to crew for a chap he met deffo UMC. But DH was a winner at other sailing that was his entry pass.

You'd have to ask them! But my guess would be independent furniture stores. Chain stores (inc. JL) are definitely a lower indicator.

JRM. MC all drawl and crawl, consciously acquiring the manners and habits of those he perceives as Upper, which is quite a lot of why he seems so odd, as if he popped down to Jermyn Street and bought a persona off the shelf. Unsettling and never rings true.

Class is crapp. Talking about class is certainly not classy and is even tacky. It is a way of making sure the likes of us working class plebs stay in our place and know that we will never be welcome to call Waitrose home.

There isn't any other country in the world that is as concerned about the class system. I find it insane.

Ah the subtle gradations of the British class system.

I started UMC but have slid a long way due to ill health and general fuckwittage.

That describes me. And I am clear that I am working class. I may have all of that, but I must work for a living, and it can all be taken away by capitalism.

But what is this MN fixation with describing class and trying to fit people into boxes? This is the most "class ridden" place I see. Most everywhere else, nobody really cares. There's more important stuff to deal with than where one sits in an imaginary structure

So can you change class through education and profession, or does that change in class only arrive at the next generation down?

WC family get child into grammar school and thence to Oxford & medicine. Is that child still WC, or do they become MC as an adult?

MC family have a child who drops out of education and gets a relatively unskilled job on minimum wage (and isn't unduly supported by parents). Does that child become WC as an adult?