I have a night out ... come home DH isn't home.

[Eatingpizza]

I have just come back from an extremely rare night out with work. I got back at just gone 1 am (europe). Dd (10) is asleep by herself. Other than the dog, not another living thing in the house.

Obviously, it was agreed between me and dh that it was okay for me to have a night out. All the local pubs are closed. His phone isn't answering. No replies to my texts. Just a half finished glass of red wine, a book and his reading glasses on the kitchen table to show he was here.

What the fuck?!

Wow. Is this the first time he has abandoned his kid? Or just the first that you know of?
Imagine if she’d choked on vomit/spit, or if she’d woken up to find the house on fire, or even just the fact she’d been abandoned. Good luck with divorcing the sociopath.

What a great way to ensure he never has to have any solo childcare responsibilities ever again.

Wait, he went to a lock in leaving your 10yo daughter asleep alone??

With no one knowing??

Can you divorce him?

What a b*stard and unfit parent!

He should have answered or at least told me what he was doing.

No, he should have stayed at home to look after the child in the house.

You say it wa agreed you have a night out-so he didnt really want to do it did he-i bet he goes out whnever he wants

and now hes making a point by going out anyway so you never do it again

what exactly is a lock in?

Where the pub locks up after closing and continues to serve a select number of clientele in secret (against licensing laws).

Thank you Basil

and now hes making a point by going out anyway so you never do it again

It's probably this.

Though DP had next door neigbour - she went and did a night shifts as a nurse and he a teacher would leave primary aged kids to go down the pub - when she finally found out it was the end of the marriage. Apparently he couldn't see an issue - so some men are this shit without making a point.

what exactly is a lock in?

Where the pub locks up after closing and continues to serve a select number of clientele in secret (against licensing laws).

And you’re also not held there against your will and can leave if you need to - so it’s a pathetic excuse.

The man is a disgrace. You cannot leave a 10 year old child at home on their own. He is an unfit parent. I am sorry for you and hope you are ok, whatever you decide to do.

I was wondering about this too. It seems a big coincidence that you'd happen to catch him the first time he did it.

If my husband did that I’d boot him out the house. It wouldn’t even enter his mind to leave the kids at home when nipping to the shop!

Honestly I would LTB over this. He has no regard forhis own DD safety. What does that say about him?

Hope OP s ok? I’d assume shit had hit fan etc today

Wow OP. I hope you are ok. This would be divorce territory for me.

I am genuinely gobsmacked at this, I rarely join the LTB crowd but honestly this would be divorce territory for me as well - that is totally and completely unforgivable!

Well if you stay with him that's your last night out for the next several years because you can't trust your absolute prick of a 'd' h.

He risked his daughters wellbeing but hey-ho presumably he now gets to go out whenever he wants while you stay home.
Seriously though if it was me it would be the end of the relationship. You get my first ever LTB.

He left your 10yo home alone at night to go to the pub???!!??!

we occasionally left dd alone at 10 for very brief periods of time, during the day. She was fully aware of what was happening and we were always reachable. We started small, literally 10 minutes, and worked our way up slowly. So I’m not saying a 10yo can’t be left alone for a bit, but definitely not at night, not without being told, and not without the parent being immediately reachable.

what your husband is neglect. I would seriously consider reporting his behavior so that you can create a paper trail. It will help you if this becomes a custody dispute.

Good grief...
He left your ten-year old daughter alone in the house with just the dog for company and went to the pub?
And you think the least he could have done was answer his phone or tell you what he was doing?
How about, he shouldn´t have gone out and left her in the first place?
I hope you never leave him to look after her again.
What would have happened if she´d woken up, alone and terrified? Seriously, I just can´t even begin to imagine.

Effective way to make you too scared to have a night out again, wasn't it?

What a bastard.

Even I, with a DH who regularly does the most inconceivably foolish, thoughtless and careless things, am flabbergasted by this. I put up with a lot, but this would be a deal breaker. Sorry OP, but I’ve joined the ranks of LTB.

You are putting your child and yourself in a very vulnerable position.

Imagine something had gone wrong. Social Services will be taking your child off you as you are not caring for her properly.

Leave him now!

When they lock the pub and make it a private party.

Well, I hope the 'comedians' at the beginning of this thread are chuffed with themselves for taking the piss out of OP who is actually genuine and in a frightening situation.

You are sad pathetic little women.