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Original poster

I have a night out ... come home DH isn't home.

253 replies

Eatingpizza · 04/06/2022 00:16

I have just come back from an extremely rare night out with work. I got back at just gone 1 am (europe). Dd (10) is asleep by herself. Other than the dog, not another living thing in the house.

Obviously, it was agreed between me and dh that it was okay for me to have a night out. All the local pubs are closed. His phone isn't answering. No replies to my texts. Just a half finished glass of red wine, a book and his reading glasses on the kitchen table to show he was here.

What the fuck?!

OP posts:
EarringsandLipstick · 04/06/2022 19:23

LikeAStar1994 · 04/06/2022 19:11

Well, I hope the 'comedians' at the beginning of this thread are chuffed with themselves for taking the piss out of OP who is actually genuine and in a frightening situation.

You are sad pathetic little women.

What are you referring to?

Posters replied to the OP with genuine questions like 'has he gone to the neighbours' or 'fallen asleep in the shed?'

They were trying to figure out what might have happened.

When OP came back to update; the answers have been unanimous about what a dangerous shit her H is.

Your post is v odd.

MistyFrequencies · 04/06/2022 19:32

What the fuck? Id pack his bags. No fucking way do you leave a 10yr old alone in the house asleep to go to the pub. Fucking hell.

girlmom21 · 04/06/2022 19:35

A lock in at 1:15am?
Licenses were extended to 1am for all pubs this weekend weren't they?

tkwal · 04/06/2022 19:39

Does he know its a crime (as well as selfish, inconsiderate and dangerous)to leave a 10 year old in the house on her own ? Have heard several child protection cases where reporters/social workers and lawyers were scandalised by the child having been abandoned so the neglectful parent could go out and get drunk/drugged up/ perform "sex acts" etc or does that judgement only apply if you're a desperate single parent? .Think you can tell what I think of your selfish lump of a husband !

Foxglovesandlilacs86 · 04/06/2022 19:49

I don’t think it is illegal to leave a child alone at home, but if something bad happens to them you can get into trouble.

either way, I’d be pissed off he did it and it’s not something my DH would ever contemplate doing.

Emotionalsupportviper · 04/06/2022 19:51

Eatingpizza · 04/06/2022 01:16

Well i didn't ring the police! I believe it is 24 hours after a person is missing. I posted on mn because I literally didn't know what to do with myself while waiting for him to turn up.

I actually had in my head that he was having someone on the side while i was gone.

Turns out he had gone down the pub and had a lock in. Am furious. He should have answered or at least told me what he was doing.

Yes. It is true. Some of us do have shit husbands. He is not the least bit sorry or understanding why I am upset.

Jesus wept!

He left a 10 year old alone in the house?

What if she'd woken up, terrified?

Or there'd been a break in, or a house fire?

He wants shooting!

Basilbrushgotfat · 04/06/2022 19:52

Foxglovesandlilacs86 · 04/06/2022 19:49

I don’t think it is illegal to leave a child alone at home, but if something bad happens to them you can get into trouble.

either way, I’d be pissed off he did it and it’s not something my DH would ever contemplate doing.

Not only that but what if she'd woken up when she was on her own?

The op was freaked, her dd would have been terrified!

Emotionalsupportviper · 04/06/2022 19:52

Foxglovesandlilacs86 · 04/06/2022 19:49

I don’t think it is illegal to leave a child alone at home, but if something bad happens to them you can get into trouble.

either way, I’d be pissed off he did it and it’s not something my DH would ever contemplate doing.

It is - there needs to be someone at least over the age of 14 in the house.

ringemoooo · 04/06/2022 19:58

A lock in at 1:15am?
Licenses were extended to 1am for all pubs this weekend weren't they?

The OP is not in the UK

girlmom21 · 04/06/2022 20:08

ringemoooo · 04/06/2022 19:58

A lock in at 1:15am?
Licenses were extended to 1am for all pubs this weekend weren't they?

The OP is not in the UK

Ok a lock in at 2am is still not a good excuse.

PS the UK is in Europe.

ringemoooo · 04/06/2022 20:18

I got back at just gone 1 am (europe)

The OP wrote this. You do not need to tell me the UK is in Europe.
It's clear from this statement that the OP meant somewhere in Europe, not the UK, probably to explain the time difference when posting.

ScootsMcHoy · 04/06/2022 20:22

PS the UK is in Europe.
🙄

Littlepinkdress · 04/06/2022 20:43

Disgusting he left the kid shame on him hope someone called social services

NancyDrooo · 04/06/2022 22:45

Emotionalsupportviper · 04/06/2022 19:52

It is - there needs to be someone at least over the age of 14 in the house.

Show quote history

That is not true in the UK. There's no legal age a child can be left home alone, but it’s against the law to leave a child alone if it puts them at risk. So given she was asleep and at no immediate or obvious risk, he’s morally wrong and selfish/stupid to have left her, but it’s not illegal.

www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/in-the-home/home-alone/#legal

I’d be fuming, OP!

KermitlovesKeyLimePie · 04/06/2022 23:02

Is he DD’s bio Dad OP?

pictish · 05/06/2022 04:38

NancyDrooo · 04/06/2022 22:45

That is not true in the UK. There's no legal age a child can be left home alone, but it’s against the law to leave a child alone if it puts them at risk. So given she was asleep and at no immediate or obvious risk, he’s morally wrong and selfish/stupid to have left her, but it’s not illegal.

www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/in-the-home/home-alone/#legal

I’d be fuming, OP!

Show quote history

Absolutely. Whatever your opinion on this, all those making noise about calling social services or the police (as if anyone fucking would) because of a 10 yr old being left alone for two or three hours, are being rather naive. They will not be interested.

pictish · 05/06/2022 04:40

And they should stop offering shit, hysterical ‘advice’ that they would never follow themselves. Jesus.

ringemoooo · 05/06/2022 06:33

Would have been helpful if the OP had stated in her post which country she was in or if she didn't want to do that, had a quick google of the rules for leaving children alone where she lives and put that info in her post.
All this talk of it being illegal in the UK (it isn't) or in NZ is irrelevant.
Perhaps it is illegal in the country the OP lives in and perhaps it isn't.

The DH shouldn't have done it though, illegal or not.

skodadoda · 05/06/2022 07:28

smileandsing · 04/06/2022 01:32

He should never be left with your child again after that. You need to get rid OP, he is a selfish arsehole who cannot be trusted to keep your precious child safe. I hope you and DD are ok.

I've lived with a selfish alcoholic, prone to disappearing acts in the middle of the night, but even he wouldn't have pulled this stunt. There really is no excuse.

That would mean OP would feel that she couldn’t have a night out. It’s controlling behaviour.

Dibbydoos · 05/06/2022 09:06

How utterly irresponsible. He's not a good dad to your daughter, anything could have happened, thankfully it didn't.
So can I ask, do you love him enough to put up with shit or have you become conditioned to it? If its the latter, get rid. You only have 1 life, don't stay with people who don't deserve you

lifecanbehardattimes · 05/06/2022 13:33

ringemoooo · 05/06/2022 06:33

Would have been helpful if the OP had stated in her post which country she was in or if she didn't want to do that, had a quick google of the rules for leaving children alone where she lives and put that info in her post.
All this talk of it being illegal in the UK (it isn't) or in NZ is irrelevant.
Perhaps it is illegal in the country the OP lives in and perhaps it isn't.

The DH shouldn't have done it though, illegal or not.

I don't think that where she lives has anything to do with it.

It's inappropriate and irresponsible in any country!

ringemoooo · 05/06/2022 14:53

I don't think that where she lives has anything to do with it
It is relevant. Laws are different in different countries. My point was that so many posters were jumping in with "it's illegal", "phone the police". If it's illegal in the country the OP lives in then perhaps a legal route could be taken. If it is not illegal then the police are not going to be interested at all.

It's inappropriate and irresponsible in any country!
Of course it is, and I said that too, but it's utterly pointless to fill a thread with posts about legalities when we don't even know which country the OP is in and therefore have no idea what the legalities there are.

Pookymalooky · 11/06/2022 19:02

Nope. I never ever ever say ltb but under these circumstances I definitely bloody well would!! A ten year old girl asleep in a house alone? Does he not know about madeleine McCann? He’s an idiot and I couldn’t trust him now ever.

TheLadyofShalott1 · 02/12/2022 05:35

Do you live in the 'Bermuda Triangle' OP?

ChangedmynameagainforChristmas · 02/12/2022 12:05

Why bring this up now months later