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Dh can go and live in the shed with his beloved dyson

189 replies

Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 09:58

I’m sick to death of the bloody thing.

It doesn’t work. Half way though something clogs. The whole thing has to be taken apart. I’m sick to death of giving it a hair cut once a week (Dyson owners will know what I mean).

The charge never lasts that long. The bloody head has to be changed for the hard floor and that head is next to useless, anything other than a large speck of dust makes it stop working.

When he bought the bloody thing, he said he would do all the vacuuming. But a hairy cat and three children including a toddler who is incapable of keeping anything on a plate means that I do end up using it when he’s working.

His Grandmother has had to move in to a care home and MIL has asked if we want the Shark that they bought her last year. I’ve bitten hand off (do you like the shark reference).

Dh is sulking saying he wants to keep his dyson. He loves it. It’s the bestest vacuum cleaner ever.

It doesn’t sound like he loves the bastard thing when he’s on the kitchen swearing at it halfway though cleaning the house trying to find out why it’s stopped working for the 6th time, but what do I know.

I’m having the shark and he can either like it or run off into the sunset with his beloved dyson and i’ll read about how “I married my vacuum cleaner” in Take a Break.

OP posts:
whirlyhead · 03/04/2022 16:52

If you think normal dysons are bad, try the mega expensive robotic ones. My friend has one and it seems to spend most of its time sulking behind the fridge. Periodically however it comes screaming out at speed, smacks any visitors in the shins then triumphantly retreats behind the fridge again.

I really think it needs therapy.

Marmite27 · 03/04/2022 16:54

I got so pissed off with my Dyson I stropped off to Costco and bought a Henry.

Chloemol · 03/04/2022 17:10

Loath dust s with a vengeance, always have done

I have a cordless vax. Pet one, works really well. Am never ever going back to a Ford one

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D0lphine · 03/04/2022 17:17

@pointythings

I've got a Dyson that's at least 15 years old, and though I hate the brand with a passion and think that Richard Dyson is an asshole, it's a great vacuum cleaner. When it does die, I will not be buying another one of his products though.
What did he do?
pointythings · 03/04/2022 18:06

What did he do?

Support Brexit, pretending to be all pro British manufacturing. Then offshored his shit to the Far East for cheap labour. That's two strikes.

TheDogsMother · 03/04/2022 18:10

Dyson vacuums are rubbish. I've had two as I suspect the builders killed the first. Have also had the handheld one which picks up nothing. I gave up on them and got a Miele Cat and Dog which is excellent.

ServantofthePeople · 03/04/2022 18:23

Fun fact: you will never meet a professional cleaner who uses a Dyson.

Panasonic or Henry.

ServantofthePeople · 03/04/2022 18:25

Also Dyson hand driers terrify small children and make sitting near the loo entrance in a restaurant unpleasant, like sitting near a runway at Heathrow.....

ServantofthePeople · 03/04/2022 18:26

“Maybe some people just get sucked in by the top-gear type explanations of the engineering in the ads. DH was asking me if I wanted a Dyson Hairdryer or air wrap until I told him it was over £400!”

Yes,this is what happens.

Fluffycloudland77 · 03/04/2022 18:27

Dhs exgf had one, it was so shit. Dh said it had so many spare parts fitted to fix it it was a whole new hoover.

I don’t know how dyson get away with it,

Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 18:35

@whirlyhead

If you think normal dysons are bad, try the mega expensive robotic ones. My friend has one and it seems to spend most of its time sulking behind the fridge. Periodically however it comes screaming out at speed, smacks any visitors in the shins then triumphantly retreats behind the fridge again.

I really think it needs therapy.

Grin
OP posts:
Tootyfilou · 03/04/2022 18:36

I loathe mine.It was a present from my parents who love theirs. Unfortunately they don't live with two golden retrievers. The bastard thing blocks about 0.2 seconds after starting it. I feel jubilant if I can hoover as far as the Kitchen door before it runs out of charge or blocks. I bought a very expensive Samsung cordless that is much better. I will keep the Dyson for when I need to hoover someones dolls house.

zaffa · 03/04/2022 18:38

@Kurtanforpm

I’m sick to death of the bloody thing.

It doesn’t work. Half way though something clogs. The whole thing has to be taken apart. I’m sick to death of giving it a hair cut once a week (Dyson owners will know what I mean).

The charge never lasts that long. The bloody head has to be changed for the hard floor and that head is next to useless, anything other than a large speck of dust makes it stop working.

When he bought the bloody thing, he said he would do all the vacuuming. But a hairy cat and three children including a toddler who is incapable of keeping anything on a plate means that I do end up using it when he’s working.

His Grandmother has had to move in to a care home and MIL has asked if we want the Shark that they bought her last year. I’ve bitten hand off (do you like the shark reference).

Dh is sulking saying he wants to keep his dyson. He loves it. It’s the bestest vacuum cleaner ever.

It doesn’t sound like he loves the bastard thing when he’s on the kitchen swearing at it halfway though cleaning the house trying to find out why it’s stopped working for the 6th time, but what do I know.

I’m having the shark and he can either like it or run off into the sunset with his beloved dyson and i’ll read about how “I married my vacuum cleaner” in Take a Break.

What head do you swap to for the hard floor? I use the same head for both but often think a hard floor head would be better
Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 18:51

I am now in proud possession of a Shark. It bends to go under the coffee table. It’s anti hair wrap so we shall see how that gets on with mine and dds long hair.

They only bought it for dh Grandma in December so it’s shiny and new.

I did the upstairs carpet and the suction was so strong it did that lift the carpet a bit thing and I was overwhelmed with joy.

I think it now means more to me than my firstborn. And far more than dh who had a go with it and sadly said “it’s alright”, before skulking off to do some DIY with his dad.

I swear I saw him stroke the dyson lovingly on his way out the back door so it’s feelings wouldn’t be hurt.

I’m now drinking wine with MIL and Kevin the shark is sat beside me with the cat sniffing him and purring. The cat never sits next to dh.

MIL keeps winding dh up by saying things like, “well you can just use the dyson to clean out the car now. If it can hack it of course” and cackling.

There is only room for one under the stairs. So we’ll let that battle commence later (the bastard dyson is going in the garage).

OP posts:
Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 18:52

@zaffa google dyson hard floor head. It looks like a brightly covered paint roller. Things get stuck in it though.

OP posts:
TheFogsGettingThicker · 03/04/2022 18:56

@Sennedd

Can anyone help the poster out? What can you hoover up that would ruin the Dyson beyond repair?
Pine needles from my real Christmas tree did it for mine Grin

I was delighted with the results. Now I have a corded Bosch who is a bit temperamental if you don't clean the filter out, but aren't they all?

newidentiy · 03/04/2022 19:03

Hated both my Dyson and they clogged and didn't pick up
Hated hetty as too cumbersome
Vax overheated every 10 mins and wouldn't work until fanned
2 sharks both clogged all the time
Maybe I just hate vacs and should find a partner tondo it for me Wink

Incidentally 35 tesco own fee years ago was best ever

winterchills · 03/04/2022 19:13

I HATE my Dyson, sharks are way better!!!

BoredZelda · 03/04/2022 19:13

Doesn’t clog my arse.

I haven’t ever had a hoover that did that….

zaffa · 03/04/2022 19:16

[quote Kurtanforpm]@zaffa google dyson hard floor head. It looks like a brightly covered paint roller. Things get stuck in it though.[/quote]
Thanks - although from what you are saying this doesn't sound like it's worth getting?

Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 19:23

@BoredZelda

Doesn’t clog my arse.

I haven’t ever had a hoover that did that….

That just made MIL snort Grin
OP posts:
Mimilamore · 03/04/2022 19:28

Henry til I die, there's a reason commercial cleaners use them.
Stubborn cat hair comes up a treat with a damp nailbrush, I squirt it with zoflora or similar...

EthelTheAardvark · 03/04/2022 19:31

See also Dyson fans. They're not better than ordinary ones, just 40 times as expensive. Why on earth would anyone buy them?

SexiestDogWalker · 03/04/2022 19:34

Literally just bought a shark to replace a shitty awful Dyson. Fucking Dyson was £500 almost. This one was £150 and it's absolutely brilliant. Runs rings around the stupid Dyson. It cuts out when it has to pick up anything bigger than a grain of sand and gives you electric shocks through your hand from the charging point if it has to suck up anything powdery. Hateful thing.

Lisajane47 · 03/04/2022 19:44

My Dyson animal ball is great. But if it broke down 6 times while using it it would be in the bin.!!!