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Dh can go and live in the shed with his beloved dyson

189 replies

Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 09:58

I’m sick to death of the bloody thing.

It doesn’t work. Half way though something clogs. The whole thing has to be taken apart. I’m sick to death of giving it a hair cut once a week (Dyson owners will know what I mean).

The charge never lasts that long. The bloody head has to be changed for the hard floor and that head is next to useless, anything other than a large speck of dust makes it stop working.

When he bought the bloody thing, he said he would do all the vacuuming. But a hairy cat and three children including a toddler who is incapable of keeping anything on a plate means that I do end up using it when he’s working.

His Grandmother has had to move in to a care home and MIL has asked if we want the Shark that they bought her last year. I’ve bitten hand off (do you like the shark reference).

Dh is sulking saying he wants to keep his dyson. He loves it. It’s the bestest vacuum cleaner ever.

It doesn’t sound like he loves the bastard thing when he’s on the kitchen swearing at it halfway though cleaning the house trying to find out why it’s stopped working for the 6th time, but what do I know.

I’m having the shark and he can either like it or run off into the sunset with his beloved dyson and i’ll read about how “I married my vacuum cleaner” in Take a Break.

OP posts:
DinosApple · 03/04/2022 12:52

Vacuum cleaners have been the bain of my adult life...

I've had 3 upright dysons (pain in the arse the lot of them), two I can no longer remember, a cordless Bosch (cloggy bastard) a handheld Dyson (DH's favourite) and a Henry (cumbersome git).

I'm not even 40 yet! My grandma had her hoover for 40 years!

Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 12:56

@DinosApple

Vacuum cleaners have been the bain of my adult life...

I've had 3 upright dysons (pain in the arse the lot of them), two I can no longer remember, a cordless Bosch (cloggy bastard) a handheld Dyson (DH's favourite) and a Henry (cumbersome git).

I'm not even 40 yet! My grandma had her hoover for 40 years!

I’m 42. I’ve lived in my own home since I was 16 and I have never had a vacuum cleaner I am totally happy with (a fact that dh throws in my face when I complain about the dyson but that’s hands down the worst and I am totally justified).

PIL arrive at 3pm. The first thing I will do is try out the Shark. I’ve even adjusted dds nap time so I can do it immediately without waking her. Ever changed a 20 months old nap? I’m in for hell tonight.

If that’s not commitment to hating the dyson, I don’t know what is.

OP posts:
Shehasadiamondinthesky · 03/04/2022 12:57

Just go and buy a reconditioned Henry on ebay. Even the cheapo £40 hoovers I buy off amazon are better than that.
Life is too short.

Interested in this thread?

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Kurtanforpm · 03/04/2022 12:59

Oh and PIL won’t think i’m odd or rude for immediately grabbing the shark out of their car and running off to try it.

Their home is like a Robert Dyas outlet, MIL has an addiction to appliances and once drove 2 and a half hours just to try out SIL new air fryer the day it was delivered.

It’s just dawned on me where dh gets it from.

OP posts:
Narutocrazyfox · 03/04/2022 13:01

Ove this post OP, really made me chuckle! Grin

I'm team Henry - he's a chunky beast to lug about, but a strong consistent performer who doesn't ever go wrong.

However if I was you I'd grab the shark, and chuck the Dyson at the earliest opportunity!!!

BlackeyedSusan · 03/04/2022 13:08

I have a Dyson (bought off 'im nextdoor) and a Miele. The cylinder Miele is easier to use. But the Dyson has its place.

Fossilsmorefossils · 03/04/2022 13:22

It doesn’t work. Half way though something clogs. The whole thing has to be taken apart. I’m sick to death of giving it a hair cut once a week (Dyson owners will know what I mean).

No? I have no idea. I have 2 dysons, one for each floor and absolutely love them. I've had a dyson clog exactly twice in about 4 years. Maybe our houses or usage are different? I have all hard floors and 2 rugs, and try to hoover downstairs every day so there's never a lot to hoover really. Just crumbs left by the toddler and cat hairs. A bit of dust maybe. Upstairs I do once a week.

mistermagpie · 03/04/2022 13:36

When DH and I got together (11 years ago) I had a Henry and he had a Dyson. He was obsessed with how good it was and when we moved in together we actually spent ages having an argument about who would get to keep their hoover. In the end we kept both and the dyson was the 'upstairs hoover'.

The bloody dyson was a nightmare, same as yours is got bunged up and was unwieldy and lost suction. Eventually it died altogether and he bought a new one. Meanwhile Henry was quietly working away with a smile on his face. The new dyson was also problematic and went the same was as the first.

Henry got a promotion to be the whole house hoover and even though he is now 15 years old he is still going strong and works perfectly. I would never swap him for a dyson!

hellosunshineagainx · 03/04/2022 13:46

I have a newer dyson and love it. Had it a year now, no issues and can vacumn my three bed easily on one charge, mix of carpet and hard floors, I have a toddler and a labrador.

Cherrysoup · 03/04/2022 13:47

I adore my corded Dyson, the cordless drives me a bit nuts and we had to google the fix for it stopping after 10 seconds recently. It frequently clogs with my mid length very curly hair.

pussycatunpickingcrossesagain · 03/04/2022 13:47

I've just bought DH a new upright dyson. Halo
It was my WA gift to him.

He once bought me a Karcher pressure washer for my birthday.

Who says romance is dead.

OP, I wish you and Kevin many happy years together.😻

Kitsmummy · 03/04/2022 13:49

I'm not a violent person but I smashed my dyson repeatedly on my flagstones until the bloody thing broke, such was my rage at using it.

Haggisfish3 · 03/04/2022 13:53

This thread is hilarious. And shows all I love about mn🤣

Mucky1 · 03/04/2022 13:54

Love my sharks! We have the lift away and cordless and they're brilliant! I hoovered with my Dysonin the morning then the shark in the aft on the day I bought it and the stuff the Shark brought up was eye watering 😂
The anti hair wrap technology doesn't work though I have to take scissors to it regularly

Tobacco · 03/04/2022 13:55

I considered putting my Henry in the bath (not plugged in) to finish it off

100problems · 03/04/2022 13:56

Can anyone help the poster out? What can you hoover up that would ruin the Dyson beyond repair?

A Bic biro did the trick nicely.

loopylindi · 03/04/2022 13:58

I've had 2 dysons. The first was the first model and worked really well. It had a couple of repairs but worked! More than I can say for its replacement - which is the biggest load of cattle waste. It has to be shown a piece of fluff, will run up to it , then decide 'nah! today's not your day,' and leave it alone on the carpet for later. Now, the on/off switch does go off, so it has to be turned off at the socket each time. To say I'm not impressed is an understatement

Hawkins001 · 03/04/2022 13:58

@Kurtanforpm

Anyone with me on how awful Dyson vacuums are? Doesn’t clog my arse.
I always prefer the Henry and Henrietta range of numatic hoovers.
Hawkins001 · 03/04/2022 14:00

@mistermagpie

When DH and I got together (11 years ago) I had a Henry and he had a Dyson. He was obsessed with how good it was and when we moved in together we actually spent ages having an argument about who would get to keep their hoover. In the end we kept both and the dyson was the 'upstairs hoover'.

The bloody dyson was a nightmare, same as yours is got bunged up and was unwieldy and lost suction. Eventually it died altogether and he bought a new one. Meanwhile Henry was quietly working away with a smile on his face. The new dyson was also problematic and went the same was as the first.

Henry got a promotion to be the whole house hoover and even though he is now 15 years old he is still going strong and works perfectly. I would never swap him for a dyson!

Same here, my Henry was second hand from charity shop, and still good.
BeepBoopBop · 03/04/2022 14:08

@Aconitum

Mine doesn't clog. I love my Dyson😃😃😃🙄

I love mine too! V11 it's fabulous ❤️❤️

Usingit · 03/04/2022 14:09

My cordless Dyson is fine and doesn't clog up, it's the V11 one but in the garage and for building work we still use our old orange Vax from the 1980s.

Deathraystare · 03/04/2022 14:18

Dyson was no good for me as an asthmatic because of having to empty the dust chamber instead of replace a bag

I cannot the obsession with Dysons or bagless machines. I watch other people with their bagless machines and the 'puff' of who knows what as they attempt to unscrew the area with all the grime in it. Ugh.

JenniferPlantain · 03/04/2022 14:18

I absolutely hate my Dyson. Awful. Like you say it clogs in three seconds, is impossible to empty without throwing dust everywhere, and can’t pick up the lightest bits of fluff. Worst purchase ever. I might freecycle it and Google whatever this shark thing is.

Duchess379 · 03/04/2022 14:23

I TOO HATE MY CORDLESS DYSON!!!!!
For all the reasons you've pointed out. I have no carpets downstairs, just rugs & the poxy thing can't even manage them without getting clogged & doing the weird whirring thing. And yes, it's an utter a-hole trying to get the bottom of the bin open without the whole thing coming off. I will never, ever buy another one. Hate it as much as the tax man! (Rant over) 😉💕

Duchess379 · 03/04/2022 14:24

@catwomando

Yep mine is a temperamental bastard too, and causes much sweating and sweating. It just gets blocked ALL THE TIME.

Fucking Dyson. I should have learned. I had an old upright 20yrars ago and after it being repaired about 4 times I just left it on the doorstep and someone nicked it. Happy day that was.

😂😆👍🏼😂