[quote DFOD]@RedToothBrush - please can you point out where I made any assumptions to your personal contribution?
IMHO your words are sneery and judgmental here:
“There’s a really dismissive and head in the sand approach going on from people volunteering”
“A friend of mine is trying to get visas for a family who are still in Ukraine and haven't yet been able to get out. She's a really lovely lady, but I can't help but think she's also not the most worldly of women too. She's got kids and it does make me wonder how thats going to go.”
“I know a few people who have signed up, and when I've talked to them, none have really thought about this side of things. I think it will be a real shock to some. And they aren't the type to be digging about on twitter either...”
“People aren't thinking it through. I know there are already some arriving here which is wonderful but yeah... Going to be an interesting local experiment...”
Being realistic and practical is thinking ahead for issues AS WELL AS looking for solutions to support as best we can together.
In my area we have 15 households lined up to host who are supported by other locals who aren’t hosting but through a buddy system who will step up to help the guests and hosts with lifts, food, donations, form filling etc. It’s a team effort.
Of course our guests will be traumatised - but we can offer peace, warmth and safety, compassion and friendship which will go some way to healing. We can also inform ourselves of trauma informed / sensitive communication and care (which is not therapy but reduces the risk of trauma being exacerbated). We also have professional MH charity on board for counselling.[/quote]
I don't think people are trying to be sneering.
It sounds as though you and your local community are doing a really good job and I for one am incredibly grateful to the people who are in a position to open up their homes and have thought through what support is going to be needed way beyond providing a roof over someone's head.
The problem though is that it seems to be a very mixed bag - my experiences on my local FB group are like RTB's - very varied (I can't host but I've offered my support to those who can).
There are definitely a good number of people who've put a huge amount of effort into mobilising wider support re: links with charities, counselling and the local Ukrainian community. But there are also many who seem really very naive about what they are taking on. One example was a host who didn't think trauma would be an issue because her family (mother and two small children) had got out early and hadn't experienced the shelling. It had to be pointed out that leaving everything you owned apart from the contents of a suitcase and leaving your husband, brother and father to fight a war and knowing you may never see them again was inherently traumatising for her and her children.
That is the problem I think, that the scheme isn't universal and it relies on individuals to have a good understanding of what they are taking on. Some hosts will be brilliant but there will be others who are woefully underprepared and I do worry for both the families and the hosts in those circumstances.