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Original poster

She took my bloody co-op card

627 replies

HollowedOut · 10/03/2022 01:18

I’ve had a friend staying with me for the last few days, she due to go home tomorrow. As a thank you for letting her stay she offered to cook us a meal this evening which I gratefully accepted. She needed to go up to Co-Op to get the ingredients so I said to her to take my membership card if she hasn’t got one.

She went up and bought all the ingredients and cooked a really lovely meal. We had a bottle of wine with the meal but fancied another so I popped up to Co-Op again to buy another. I scan my member card like always and she’s spent all my points! There was about £30 on there that I have saved up for months. I like to know that I’ve always got a bit on there in case I’m short one month, it’s just a bit of reassurance.

If someone asked you to take their loyalty card to a shop when you had offered to cook them a meal would you assume that meant the person was offering to pay for the meal with their points? Or would you think they just wanted you to scan their card at checkout so you have a few more points?

Apologies if I’m rambling but it’s 1am, I’ve drunk a bottle of wine and I’m disproportionately pissed off that she’s spent my points!

OP posts:
LookItsMeAgain · 13/03/2022 14:01

What you need to do @HollowedOut now that she isn't under your roof and has left, is to contact her one more time and say it CLEARLY and stop skirting around the issue and you being embarrassed to ask her. She isn't in the slightest bit embarrassed for having used your Co-Op points. Not a single bit.
So say to her:
"Hi CFer friend, I've spoken to you about the fact that you used my points in the Co-Op in order to 'pay' for the dinner you cooked as a thank you to me for hosting you recently. I need the £30 that was on the card back. You had told me that you were treating me to a meal as a thank you. Not only did I have to pay for this meal out of my points, but I had to spend a lot of time cleaning up after you cooked and you didn't even offer to help with that either. It might not seem like a lot to you but that money is very important to me and as it seems like not a lot to you, you won't miss the money but I will!
Please transfer the £30 to my account as soon as possible as those points are my safety net for my household."

Gonnagetgoing · 13/03/2022 17:17

Just seen your update.

I’d definitely ask her for the money back.

Just as an aside what was she like re money? I had an ex close friend who earned well (better than me) but would make a fuss over £5 when I wouldn’t do, but she was also forever getting parking tickets etc. If your friend was tight before or not generous or there were other signs re her character when you knew her better then she’s probably not changed at all now.

MeridasMum · 13/03/2022 17:35

Are you going to ask for the money back OP? Hi know you hinted heavily but she clearly needs a very clear message that you need the money back. Something like:

Hi friend
I had a great time with you this week, let's do it again soon!
Here's my bank details for the £30 of points you spent. If you can get it to me asap, that'd be appreciated. As I mentioned, it's a bit of a safety net for me so I can't afford to lose it.
Speak soon

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LovelyIssues · 14/03/2022 20:40

Please don't lose a friendship over a very simple misunderstanding. It's sounds of a bit of an extreme over reaction. She probably said to the cashier "I have this to use" and they've took it as she's using that to pay.

RandomBasic · 14/03/2022 21:03

@LovelyIssues

Please don't lose a friendship over a very simple misunderstanding. It's sounds of a bit of an extreme over reaction. She probably said to the cashier "I have this to use" and they've took it as she's using that to pay.
Op explained the impact and the friend just giggled. That's not a friend.
LadyPropane · 14/03/2022 21:04

I've just read your update.

She's a dick if she hasn't gotten that money back to you already.

I'm so sorry OP.

marqueses · 15/03/2022 08:34

@LovelyIssues

Please don't lose a friendship over a very simple misunderstanding. It's sounds of a bit of an extreme over reaction. She probably said to the cashier "I have this to use" and they've took it as she's using that to pay.
If that happened how do you explain the subsequent lying about it and ducking the issue of paying back the £30? I think you are being a little naive
Cocomarine · 15/03/2022 08:45

@LovelyIssues what about, “don’t lose a friendship by stealing £30 off your mate”?

LovelyIssues · 15/03/2022 11:39

@Cocomarine she already explained it was a genuine mistake. Its something me and my friends would laugh about.

Tdcp · 15/03/2022 11:52

@LovelyIssues

The problem is that the "friend" has cooked a meal FOR the op as a thank you, which the op then paid for, cleaned up after and then she laughed and ignored the op when she said she needed the money that the friend was never supposed to have in the first place. Even if it was a mistake, which I highly doubt, if it was my mistake I'd have paid my friend back the money without a conversation, let alone after she's stated how much she needs it.

How anyone can't see a problem with this whole scenario baffles me.

AnxiousHeffalump · 15/03/2022 11:53

@Tdcp I agree. The friend is beyond cheeky to have not offered to repay her. She must have known too.

rookiemere · 15/03/2022 11:57

@Tdcp don't deny it is an issue. It just seems that a straightforward message to (not) friend with bank details, requesting reimbursement of the £30, is the most likely to reach a satisfactory conclusion.

BlaBlaSmthSmth · 15/03/2022 12:55

[quote LovelyIssues]@Cocomarine she already explained it was a genuine mistake. Its something me and my friends would laugh about.[/quote]
Yes but would you be laughing if your friend wasn't? And if instead, she was explaining that money was tight and that £30 was her safety net? Because that's the context of this situation. It may not be much to you but to others it will be.

Kristof · 15/03/2022 13:49

OMG! Five days and some of you are still banging on about it! It's done, stop wasting emotional energy over it ..... Move on like OP has

BlaBlaSmthSmth · 15/03/2022 14:40

@Kristof

OMG! Five days and some of you are still banging on about it! It's done, stop wasting emotional energy over it ..... Move on like OP has
Oh yes but you coming back to the thread after a couple of days is completely different to the others who did 😂
implantreplace · 15/03/2022 14:41

@Kristof

OMG! Five days and some of you are still banging on about it! It's done, stop wasting emotional energy over it ..... Move on like OP has
Very odd post

You just brought it right back up to Active when you posted that

Kristof · 15/03/2022 16:18

What you mean more active than it was just before I posted, 7 posts today (think that means it was already active don't you). I'm not the one who is still banging on about the sh+# friend who stole 30 quid ..... Like the rest who cant let it go....

Kristof · 15/03/2022 16:22

I came back to the thread out of amazement when I recieved an email notification that people were still going on and on and on and on like it was The Nuremberg trials

implantreplace · 15/03/2022 16:22

The odd thing is

Presumably those posters wanted to post, hence selecting the thread

Whereas you weren’t interested and yet still selected it, simply to express your disinterest

Grin
FlippyFloppyFlappy · 15/03/2022 16:25

@implantreplace

The odd thing is

Presumably those posters wanted to post, hence selecting the thread

Whereas you weren’t interested and yet still selected it, simply to express your disinterest

Grin

Yes but if you've commented on it it comes up on "threads I'm on", pretty annoying when the OP stopped answering days ago yet posters are adding nothing new to the already long thread 🤷🏼‍♀️

I agree with Kristof

implantreplace · 15/03/2022 16:27

Yes but if you've commented on it it comes up on "threads I'm on", pretty annoying when the OP stopped answering days ago yet posters are adding nothing new to the already long thread

Oh the thread is definitely dying out
But it just seemed peculiar to select it and comment in the name of disinterest

TheArtfulBlogger · 15/03/2022 16:37

@implantreplace

The odd thing is

Presumably those posters wanted to post, hence selecting the thread

Whereas you weren’t interested and yet still selected it, simply to express your disinterest

Grin

Grin Grin

Well said!

"It's alright if I say my piece, but you others who do are saddos" lol

Kristof · 15/03/2022 17:13

Can't be bothered to name you.....

If you took the time to read the thread you would see I have posted before, when it was still relevant, so not so well said really.... More infantile knee jerk post

@FlippyFloppyFlappy. Agree, some just have nothing better to do than post on a dead thread

Kristof · 15/03/2022 17:16

@implantreplace

Do try and check before you post sarcasm.... It makes you look less foolish

BlaBlaSmthSmth · 15/03/2022 18:14

Agree, some just have nothing better to do than post on a dead thread

Still you can be included in that statement though can't you 🤦🏽‍♀️
The thing is though it's not dead, because if people keep posting then it'll keep showing up in notifications..the same way it popped up in yours.

Swipe left for the next trending thread