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Friend telling me to not to join night out because I'm a close contact

376 replies

feelingannoyed1 · 26/02/2022 14:01

Had a night out planned with friends tonight, one I've been really looking forward to for ages as, for one reason or another, we haven't met up since summer last year. Was looking forward to getting dressed up and having a few drinks, this isn't something I get to do very often as I have young kids. For context, the other members of the group don't have kids and get out much more than me.

But of course we now have a positive Covid case in our household. I'm negative and have no symptoms, but thought it was just courtesy to let the group know. Was expecting them just to say oh that's fine, we're looking forward to seeing you, but the organiser wrote back saying what a shame, they'll all miss me and hopefully I can join another time!

I'm actually really upset. There's no reason I can't go, and we have to start living our lives again. The impact on everyone's mental health is too great, and that includes me missing out on some much needed social interaction (and yes I know there are much worse things going on in the world right now).

I spoke to one of the other girls in the group, she was happy for me to come, but didn't really want to get caught up in a bit of an argument, and either do I. I just think if the organiser isn't comfortable sitting on a table with a close contact who is negative (despite herself working quite closely with COVID positive patients!) then it should be her that should stay at home, not me!

Just need a rant, this has actually really upset me ☹️

OP posts:
girlmom21 · 27/02/2022 15:44

@MrsBerthaRochester

COVID IS OVER. Its time to party!!! Can the moaning minnies please stay at home so the rest of us can get on with living(with the illness that is no more than a cold to the VAST majority. Fact)
So fuck the minority?
EthelTheAardvark · 27/02/2022 16:01

@MrsBerthaRochester

COVID IS OVER. Its time to party!!! Can the moaning minnies please stay at home so the rest of us can get on with living(with the illness that is no more than a cold to the VAST majority. Fact)
Tell me, if you met the relatives of one of the 1000+ people who have died of covid in the last week, would you call them moaning minnies and tell them that Covid is over?
MrsBerthaRochester · 27/02/2022 16:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

EthelTheAardvark · 27/02/2022 16:04

@MissMaple82

You should of kept your mouth shut as its obviouslygoing to create anxiety for those that still fear it. However she's no right to say you can't go out, your negative and no symptoms, go out and enjoy yourself, if she's so scared she can stay home
Should have. You're.

And the organiser isn't saying OP can't go out, she just asking her not to join the gathering that she has organised. Which she has every right to do.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 27/02/2022 16:05

I must tell my 3 close friends with Long Covid ,one who is still unable to work that Covid is over, bet they'll be delighted.

Covid isn't over, it's just not going anywhere, big difference.

Lennybenny · 27/02/2022 16:12

@MrsBerthaRochester

People die. Every day. Of other illnesses not just covid. Folk stayed home for nearly two years to protect the minority so fuck off with the oh you selfish because you want to get on with it narrative. We have been told its time to live with it and thats exactly what I shall do.
Me too!
Lennybenny · 27/02/2022 16:18

@MrsBerthaRochester

COVID IS OVER. Its time to party!!! Can the moaning minnies please stay at home so the rest of us can get on with living(with the illness that is no more than a cold to the VAST majority. Fact)
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾💃🏾🙌🏾💃🏾🙌🏾💃🏾🙌🏾
girlmom21 · 27/02/2022 16:18

@MrsBerthaRochester

People die. Every day. Of other illnesses not just covid. Folk stayed home for nearly two years to protect the minority so fuck off with the oh you selfish because you want to get on with it narrative. We have been told its time to live with it and thats exactly what I shall do.
You're not selfish for 'wanting to get on with it'. You're selfish for doing what you want with no consideration for anyone else.

You'd probably 'want to get on with it' when you were flying to Tenerife but you wouldn't begrudge an emergency landing for someone having a heart attack at the back of the plane, would you?

TYbakedpotato · 27/02/2022 16:24

@tackling

So you really meant, "I might be infectious but want to go out, so please can stay at home if that would make you uncomfortable"?

OP, that's so incredibly unreasonable I don't know where to start.

This.

My friends will continue to tell me if they are Covid+ or have knowingly been in close contact with someone who is, and I'll return the courtesy.

If we didn't have that mutual respect for each other, we wouldn't be friends. I'd also be pretty pissed off by a 'friend' not only wanting to see me whilst potentially carrying Covid, but wanting to go out and socialise and potentially infect random strangers too.

We're not talking about a low earner on a zero hours contract making the difficult decision between 1) taking personal responsibility and staying home and 2) feeling under overwhelming financial pressure to earn enough money to live. We're talking about a night out.

EthelTheAardvark · 27/02/2022 16:35

You would be expected to go to work even if positive

No, you wouldn't. The advice is "Get tested if you have COVID-19 symptoms, and stay at home if positive".

PieonaBarm · 27/02/2022 16:57

I'm CEV and I would encourage you to come out. We need to get on with life!

MrsBerthaRochester · 27/02/2022 17:28

Im in Scotland and from tomorrow no more vaccine passports. Yippee!!! I cant wait to start socialising again properly with no masks, social distancing. Back to some sort of normality. and as I said if you dont like it,stay at home.

Mistressiggi · 27/02/2022 17:48

Masks aren't being removed in Scotland tomorrow, are they? I know nothing of this.

Mistressiggi · 27/02/2022 17:52

Just googled - another three weeks.

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 27/02/2022 19:35

Oh bless - @Lilifer has done some Googling and is now an epidemiologist 🤭

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 27/02/2022 19:37

@MrsBerthaRochester

COVID IS OVER. Its time to party!!! Can the moaning minnies please stay at home so the rest of us can get on with living(with the illness that is no more than a cold to the VAST majority. Fact)
Is this post ironic?
Lilifer · 27/02/2022 19:42

@MyrtlethePurpleTurtle

Oh bless - *@Lilifer* has done some Googling and is now an epidemiologist 🤭
Oh what a burn! 👏🏻👏🏻
Smashedavacado · 27/02/2022 20:48

I had covid recently. Hardly any symptoms. Tested negative day 5 & 6 so went to work that day. Dinner out scheduled on day 6 - checked with friends they were happy for me to come. I genuinely would have not if they worried I was still a risk.
Husband tested positive 10 days later and I again checked with friends before socialising.
It's just polite - nothing about the rules..

balalake · 27/02/2022 20:50

Even if your friends were fine with it, I don't think you should have considered going. I am glad to read that the organiser thinks of others.

dfendyr · 27/02/2022 21:05

[quote feelingannoyed1]@MsHampton but would you be happy to meet up with a friend who didn't have flu but someone in their household did? [/quote]
I wouldn't be best pleased to be honest.

Would you go out if one of your household had the vomiting bug?

EthelTheAardvark · 27/02/2022 22:18

@MrsBerthaRochester

Im in Scotland and from tomorrow no more vaccine passports. Yippee!!! I cant wait to start socialising again properly with no masks, social distancing. Back to some sort of normality. and as I said if you dont like it,stay at home.
You'd better emigrate then, you've got another three weeks in Scotland.
worriedatthemoment · 27/02/2022 23:17

@dfendyr yes as long as I never had it as kids often have them and I rarely catch them and I have always had to go to work and other dc's to school
Does your whole family stay home from work and school everytime one person is ill

worriedatthemoment · 27/02/2022 23:30

@RockinHorseShit its random my ds had it in october not one of us caught it living in the house and having close contact in days before
Then ds2 got it in jan and isolated straight away , i caught it of him bit ds and dh didn't catch of me or him and i was sitting around with them as had negative LFT but then pcr came back positive
Then i have known others who caught it from a brief encounter
There is no hard and fast rule with this

Ivyonafence · 28/02/2022 00:17

The cognitive dissonance of people who in one breath claim that resuming life, going out without restrictions, doing as they please is a basic human need and critical to their mental health, anything else is cruel and unbearable....

...Only in the next breath to say 'if people are worried (read 'vulnerable') they can stay home.'

Right.

So people with health conditions should just stay home and do nothing while their mental and physical health decays. Or they can go out and let you play Russian roulette with their health.

As long as they don't have to make small adjustments for the sake of their fellow human, I guess everything is fine.

The fucking selfishness and complete lack of insight into their own double standards is staggering.

Lou98 · 28/02/2022 00:21

@MrsBerthaRochester in Scotland the passports are no longer a requirement from tomorrow but businesses can still ask for them if they choose to.
Masks are still a legal requirement until the 21st of March and you do still need to isolate if you test positive in Scotland