Unplanned pregnancy, I am so scared to tell my partner

[emmaa1990]

Hello,

I am on a pill which I have been taking, I was on 3 lots of antibiotics- could this be how I have fallen pregnant?
Anyway I am late for my period, so yesterday I did a test off my own back, and to my shock it was positive. I am so so scared as this is totally unplanned- I still haven’t told my boyfriend of two years, I am so scared of how he will react. What if he says absolutely not, or is angry at me?

Please can someone give me advice or calm me down! Thank you

Thankyou everyone going to tell him later, will be fine- just got to do it. Yeah I’m just nervous and scared that’s all but thanks for your support xx

@MrsPsmalls god knows why you’re allowed on this group, please don’t tell me you have kids? I’d be ashamed to have a mother like you, just completely rude, get off my post if you have nothing supportive to say.

And thank you so much for sticking up for me ladies, that’s what girls should do! Not put someone down when they are already incredibly down! I’d be ashamed writing that on somebody’s post.

M

@MrsPsmalls

You sound incredibly immature and dramatic op. In no way do you sound ready to be a parent and god alone knows how you parent a six year old.

You sound like really horrible person

@MrsPsmalls I bet she will be a parent of kindness. I wonder if you are as mean to kids as you are to pregnant women!

@emmaa1990 look, the way I see it you are panicking but i will all be ok.
So a bit of experience here. I had to tell my DP I was pregnant 4 months into our relationship. I cried, I flapped, I cried again...I even asked my mate to tell him (she said no and that she will have a bottle of wine for me instead)
My DP categorically did not want kids.
Right now he is playing with our 8 and 6 year old. He also took my daughter on as his own (her dad passed away) she is now a moody teenager who I struggle with and she is my blood!
Yes he panicked, yes he went very quiet but he wouldn't be without them now.
It will be fine, do not worry if he panics or goes quiet. After a bit of time he will open up and hopefully be over the moon

@Ursusmajor

I have also been told by drs/pharmacists that modern antibiotics don’t affect the pill anymore and that it’s no longer considered necessary to use a 2nd contraception method while you’re taking them. (Mostly amoxicillin in my experience). OP bear in mind it may have nothing to do with antibiotics. The pill has a failure rate even with perfect use. You might be the 3/100 who get pregnant despite using the pill perfectly

The pill is 99.7% effective with perfect use. You mean 0.3 in 100

rifampicin type antibiotics effect contraception which is why my pharmacist was appalled that my GP hadn't warned me before taking the course. I was prescribed rifampicin after a throat swap showed I had meningitis. I fell pregnant during the course.
DS1 is now 9.

Always best to check with your pharmacist before taking any medication if it can effect your contraception ladies!!

How did he take the news OP?

Thanks ladies.

So I have called and said it has a faint line (which it has on the strip pregnancy strips you get - cheap ones!) and then I said I’m so sorry to worry you but I have a clear blue test here to do - I will do it when you’re here, so he sort of knows- he said I’m
Not worried il be over soon.

So I have a feeling things will be ok. It’s me - all of this is me and my anxiety! I really over think things xx

I will update you tomorrow after conversations xx

Well it sounds promising at least

Good luck tonight 🤞🏼

Good luck, your dp has said not to worry, so that's a good sign, try and distract yourself for now...if poss x x

good luck...i had something similar and it was a turning point in our relationship and we are now married and have two more DC

Good luck 🤞

Thank you so much ladies he will be here soon xx

I do this kind of thing in my life put of and put of then the anxiety is crippling. Hope goes OK op. X

@bellalou1234 yes same I block everything out
I shouldn’t but I always do.
I make things worse by keeping it inside! Il let you all know how it goes tho I am really nervous xx

@emmaa1990

Thanks ladies.

So I have called and said it has a faint line (which it has on the strip pregnancy strips you get - cheap ones!) and then I said I’m so sorry to worry you but I have a clear blue test here to do - I will do it when you’re here, so he sort of knows- he said I’m
Not worried il be over soon.

So I have a feeling things will be ok. It’s me - all of this is me and my anxiety! I really over think things xx

I will update you tomorrow after conversations xx

I think it's normal for women to feel anxious and "at fault" sometimes with an unplanned pregnancy. I think it's because it happens within our body, so there is a feeling that it's something we should have control over. But we don't. Women can't control what happens inside our body when a man puts his sperm inside.

It may feel like your fault, but it's not.

And the pill, with "perfect use" being 99% (or more) effective? It's not really possible for us to use them "perfectly" every day , always. Life interferes; we've to take it at different times of the day, or forget on the morning and take it at night. We're ill, and vomit it up. We aren't machines - life gets in the way.

But it's not your fault.

Good luck! Sounds promising that he said he's not worried - you never know he might be absoulty delighted! I am also an over thinking/ over worrier so I totally get how you are feeling x

Remember OP, if he really didn't want to have children he should have worn a condom or had a vasectomy. He does have some responsibility to stop his sperm making a baby.

However, I really hope it goes okay later and after some time to calm down (if needed), he ends up on the same page as you.

@emmaa1990
Good luck and I hope you get the reaction you want. DH and I hadn’t been together long when I fell pregnant (was using a cap. Badly obviously) Like you I am extremely anxious and overthink everything. I fretted and cried and even thought about running away and never seeing him again and bringing the baby up on my own. Anyway I bit the bullet and told him. He was a bit quiet and a bit stunned but it all worked out well in the end. We’ve been together almost 30 years now and although we sometimes do regret not having a lot of time together before our first was born to do things like travelling etc we wouldn’t change our life for anything.

Ahh bless you, OP. I remember telling my DH and he couldn't speak for over an hour! Hope all goes well x

Hope all goes well OP. He might be over the moon!

Hoping for a happy reaction OP!

Hope all is ok this morning OP