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Original poster

What secrets do you know that you wish you didn't!

181 replies

BubbleBathBitch · 21/01/2022 12:46

I have a couple of secrets that I wish I didn't know, one of them has only transpired this week which has prompted this thread.

I know who the father of my friends child is. She doesn't know that I know. The child keeps asking who her father is and friend won't tell them. Now that I know I wish I didn't!

My other one is that (a different) friend of mine has 3 younger siblings. The 4 of them thought they all had the same dad - they don't. In fact there are 4 different dads. My friend knows this but her siblings don't.

It makes me feel so uncomfortable knowing MASSIVE things like this when the people involved don't know which got me thinking, just to lighten my load - what secrets do you know that you wish you didn't!?

OP posts:
WetLookKnitwear · 22/01/2022 11:48

My aunt was asked to chop her massive (leylandii?) back by her neighbours because they used to be able to see the sea from their house and the trees grew to obstruct it. They were retirement age at the time, and they asked nicely a few times. She never chopped them back and the neighbours have now died of old age, having never gotten their sea view back.

Not really a secret, I just wish I didn’t know it because it’s sad.

I’ve been told about affairs I didn’t want to know about but that’s boring.

Loveisthere · 22/01/2022 12:00

I know that an ex colleagues had a child with another man when she was married. She never told the child or the husband. Her husband passed away and never found out and the grown up child has no idea

HermioneGrangersHair · 22/01/2022 12:11

@Sportycustard

My grandmother always promised me her wedding ring but she didn't leave a will and someone else took the ring.

I was handed a bag of granny's jewellery which was thought to be not worth much...except one of the pieces is worth around £7k. I only found out when it went in for repair so I could wear it. It's a very famous jewellery brand.

No one else knows. I don't know whether to spill the beans.

My aunts would probably sell it and take the money. I wear the item and will hand it on to my daughter.

Sometimes I feel guilty, sometimes I don't.

I’m sorry you didn’t get the ring she promised. I’d keep the item and think of your grandmother when I wear it (and enjoy the secret).
FindingMeno · 22/01/2022 12:13

Aliens will invade in 2025.

LaQuern · 22/01/2022 12:16

My mum wasn't her mums first born.

My grandmother had a secret baby at 13.

My mother doesn't know, it was only unearthed on a family tree search.

Curioushorse · 22/01/2022 12:23

I know a fairly famous politician sexually abused his daughter (now an adult). I know from her- and it was very believable.

He has also done a lot of good in his career, and is very well-respected.

We've never spoken about it since, but I know his daughter's children have never been left alone with him, and I know he's bought them a house, paid for their education, done a lot to help- positively, not just showering money.

It's really hard to get my head around every time I see tributes to him in the media. Life is so complicated.....

weleasewoderick23 · 22/01/2022 12:47

My exh left me 30 odd years ago for another woman. She turned out to be really nice and supportive ( I preferred her to the ex!) She got pregnant by him and had a termination that I took her to. Her reasoning being that he couldn't do the right thing by the children he had ( with me) and the relationship was over for her.
The sad thing is that she moved on with someone else and has fertility issues and never had any ds of her own. My exh doesn't know any of this and never will ( from me).

GloriaSicTransitMundi · 22/01/2022 13:16

Pangolin44
There was a period of my life where family members decided to unload their terrible secrets to me.

I absolutely refused to be the 'keeper of the secrets' so told everyone anything anyone told me.

It's very freeing.

If someone offloads to you, it's not a secret. Don't be someone's shit-litter tray.

You are absolutely not the repository of anyone else's issues.

I'm curious - were the secrets told to you in confidence? Did you tell them you were going to 'tell everyone' before you told anyone else?

SavBbunny · 22/01/2022 13:20

Just to clarify I have reported the product it is not a baby item or food stuff.
It is used by professionals only. Highly likely you wouldn't be effected.

Imonaspendingban · 22/01/2022 13:35

@Pangolin44

There was a period of my life where family members decided to unload their terrible secrets to me.

I absolutely refused to be the 'keeper of the secrets' so told everyone anything anyone told me.

It's very freeing.

If someone offloads to you, it's not a secret. Don't be someone's shit-litter tray.

You are absolutely not the repository of anyone else's issues.

I had this when I was pregnant with my first-very difficult pregnancy and other issues in my life going on

For some reason my family thought then was the time to offload all the families dirt onto me-and there was a lot of dirt

I was never to breathe a word

Fuck that-I spilled all and the trouble I got into was unreal

I don’t see what I did wrong-they told me and I passed it on to other family members-why should the buck stop with me?

I still don’t know why I had to be the secret keeper-I didn’t ask for that role,it was just dumped onto me as I was the eldest and then I was meant to pass it on to my eldest and on it went

Fuck that-it stopped with me and it caused barely a ripple with who I told-the trouble came from who told me!

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 22/01/2022 13:51

@justjudtwhy
How does being an "evil twin of Elton John" manifest itself exactly? 😂

My guess is - plays the piano like Les Dawson whilst singing Black Sabbath songs? Hmm

Hello606 · 22/01/2022 14:06

My father in law received a Fathers Day card from someone anonymous. FIL insists he has never cheated on MIL so would have been from before if it’s true. MIL doesn’t know because we have no idea how to even find out if it’s a joke or not. If it is true, they’d be at least 35

StrawberrySanta · 22/01/2022 15:44

I know someone had an affair with a married man, had his baby, baby continued to see his dad. The baby is a teenager now, still sees his dad, knows he's a secret. Man's family don't know.

Toomanypeople · 22/01/2022 15:50

My sister had an affair. 10 years later bil has no idea and I wish I never found out

Paranoidandroidmarvin · 22/01/2022 17:09

My husband found out that the man he worked with was secretly gay. Had a separate phone and email. Met up with men in his lunch break.

Isseywith3witchycats · 22/01/2022 17:45

years ago worked at a hotel and know that someone (dead now) who was on a weekly television program and very well known and respected and married arranged an assignation with another younger guest at the hotel in London

ErinAoife · 22/01/2022 18:12

My sil told me she was sexually abused by a neighbor as a child. She hasn't tell her siblings about it. She is still neighbour with him he is now in his seventy. She did tell her mom at the time but she did nothing about it and did not report the neighbour to the police so my sil was a bit upset that her mother did not support her and still invite the neighbour around.

Ohhhthepain · 22/01/2022 18:27

@Sportycustard I’ve not read the whole thread. Don’t feel bad, don’t tell them. When my relative passed I only asked for 2 things, one I was denied (I’d asked for it for one of my children) I did get the second item but was told I had to return it if it turned out to be worth anything. It is worth a little if you do some research, not huge amounts but certainly enough for a good weekend away if I sold it. I won’t be telling or parting with it so it can be sold. Like you I’ll be cherishing it.

notacooldad · 22/01/2022 18:34

I know so many secrets about my son's school friends and families and issues in their lives including some very serious ones. I have not or would not breath a word to a soul. I know this through my job.
One instance is that people go on about how nice one of the dads is. I know absolutely he is not,nowhere near. But I just smile in agreement.

Legalconundrums · 22/01/2022 19:50

I was sexually abused as a small child by an older boy neighbour and my male cousin, not at the same time. They were one off's and at the time I didn't know it was abuse. I've never told a living soul and never will.

feelsobadfeltsogood · 22/01/2022 20:02

@Angrymum22

My DS’s ex girlfriend is spiralling into drug addiction and her parents have no idea - my current uncomfortable secret. I know lots of secrets but professional confidentiality means that I’m good at keeping secrets.
That's so sad I'd have a word with her parents, if I was the girls Mum I'd rather know do I could try to help x
nadgersbadgers · 22/01/2022 20:11

DHs best friend died in a tragic accident. He was having an affair at the time and his mistress was pregnant (she terminated the pregnancy just after his funeral)

His poor widow is still utterly broken by his death. Unbeknownst to her he was an utter shit they're whole marriage and she brings their children up alone, still speaking of him like a god.

CoastalWave · 22/01/2022 20:13

@SecretKeeper1

I know a few and I hate knowing them. The toughest one is that my ex boyfriend had a sister who went missing as a teenager 30 years ago, never to be seen again by family. We have long since broken up but the arrival of social media plus elements of my work led me to track her down alive and well, thriving in fact. I’ve checked, she’s not listed as officially missing with police, but I don’t know if my ex and his mum ever found her. I doubt it, and seeing how well she has done makes me believe her alleged reasons for running away. I’d love to bump into my ex and ask what he knows, and pretend offer to help if he hasn’t found her.

Weirdly, I don’t have any big secrets of my own, they’re all other peoples.

Ouch. I'd find it very hard to keep that one.

Her mum surely deserves to know her daughter isn't dead? I would imagine not knowing is actually 100x worse than having bad news in some respects.

pasturesgreen · 22/01/2022 20:23

My father's best friend, who has now sadly passed away, wasn't the son of the couple who brought him up as his parents (he was never formally adopted, his mother wasn't married and it just wasn't the done thing back then - in the Forties - her married sister and her husband just took him on as their own).

My father knows and told me. The best friend's son doesn't know. I sometimes imagine I'll tell him after my father passes away, but of course I won't. I wish I didn't knew.

TheVolturi · 22/01/2022 20:51

Some of these are heartbreaking Flowers

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