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Anonymous letter in the post today- thoughts?

207 replies

Janeandjohnny · 07/01/2022 23:02

So today I get a card envelope which had been opened by local mail handling/ in error/ damaged. It was then re packed in a post plastic bag with an apology for damage and I got it.

My address had a quirk on it which is local, (my business is at my home address and that has the 'proper' address that I mostly use) so this letter I think is from someone local due to use of road name.

Inside was a sheet of paper with

FAGGOTT - time to leave the (drawing of a closet).

Kind of disturbing, odd and out of the blue.
Im happily married for 21 years and aged 48 if this makes any difference?
Should I ignore, throw away, tell police etc etc. Any thoughts?

OP posts:
NdujaWannaDance · 08/01/2022 03:37

It's someone who knows about your past history dappling in bisexuality and doesn't understand that was all it was. They think you are living a lie and using your wife as a beard.

You are not and she knows anyway, so shrug it off and forget it.

(keep the letter though, in case some sort of hate campaign or stalking starts and you need to involve the police.)

NdujaWannaDance · 08/01/2022 03:38

dabbling

Alip1965 · 08/01/2022 04:59

It's illegal to send threatening or offensive (subjective) hate mail. I would log it with police. Just incase the fruit cake that sent it continues.

Zonder · 08/01/2022 05:41

@Marvellousmadness

I wouldnt have given it a second of thought

It would have been in the bin and forgotten. Jezus. Not worth mental space.

But what if it escalates? I'd pop this in a bag in a drawer for now.
user1471447924 · 08/01/2022 05:42

Seems odd that the mail center would open it, see that it was offensive post and then send it to on you anyway!? I think it could well be somebody there stirring up trouble.

Mummyoflittledragon · 08/01/2022 05:53

@mathanxiety

It's odd that it has no frank mark and was opened at the mail centre. It's also odd that the letter inside is in red marker in a hand that differs from that on the envelope.

Is it possible there is some prankster (perhaps homophobic, perhaps not) at the mail center who opened an unfranked letter meant for you with genuine correspondence inside, removed the genuine letter, and inserted a prank letter in red marker instead?

Mail is mainly laser franked these days, which is not visible from the naked eye.

I would contact the sorting office op as it is odd the letter was in some way opened then sent on.

expat101 · 08/01/2022 05:55

please just give it to the police. It might have been meant for you, or someone else. Either or, this isn't right for someone to do this to another.

CovidCorvid · 08/01/2022 06:15

Maybe at the sorting offices two envelopes were damaged and they accidently swapped the contents over when repackaging?

Joystir59 · 08/01/2022 06:34

I wonder if it's some older local gay guy who has internalised homophobia and who's got a thing for you? Anyway, you should definitely report it to the police.

2022HowDoYouDo · 08/01/2022 06:45

Seems pretty obvious to me it's a Christmas temp at the sorting office having a laugh, particularly as the handwriting on the note doesn't match the handwriting on the envelope. I've heard of similar happening before. Report to Royal Mail.

MajesticElephant · 08/01/2022 06:48

Gosh there are so many professional detectives on Mumsnet, who knew! Hmm

SoNotRainbowRhythms · 08/01/2022 06:53

Tell the police as it is a hate incident even if it is aimed at someone who isn't actually gay.

UserError012345 · 08/01/2022 06:57

I'd keep it just in case you get anymore and you need to report. I wouldn't at this point.

nuancedcloud · 08/01/2022 06:59

Unsettling… hope nothing else happens OP and you can put it behind you.

JustUseTheDoorSanta · 08/01/2022 07:07

@FlatCheese

If the writing's totally different and it was open and repackaged, could the contents not have been part of the original envelope in the first place? To me it sounds like they've put two items together that don't belong and somewhere out there is a Christmas card meant for you that dropped out of the envelope.
I rather like the idea that someone was supposed to receive an abusive letter and instead got a Christmas card, then had a happy Christmas.

I think it should be reported to the police in case there are a number of these events either targeting you or targeting many people. Just 2 similar letters from the sorting office would make a post office culprit obvious for example, or follow-up up note to you mentioning something specific about the country you studied in would mean it's clearly someone you knew then. Unless something else happens, I wouldn't assume it's someone who knows anything about previous relationships, nor that they are out to get you. Report and hand over evidence, then forget about it. Sorry you've had an idiot get under your skin though, that's not nice.

ApolloandDaphne · 08/01/2022 07:09

Very odd. Could you mention to the person who popped into your mind that you had this weird letter to see their reaction?

Needrichangemynameagain · 08/01/2022 07:15

What is address quirk?

iloveeverykindofcat · 08/01/2022 07:16

Log it with police. This person is angry, hateful, knows where you live, and is far too interested in you. Hopefully you'll never hear from them again, but unfortunately this can also be the start of a well-known pattern of behaviour.

userrname · 08/01/2022 07:16

My thoughts are it’s either a husband of one of your female clients who are jealous of the attention their wife gives you (this is assuming your business involves a close relationship with your customers), and perhaps there was something in the envelope which ripped it open and fell out during processing.

Or, it’s a loser at the mail centre who saw an opportunity to pull a prank.

I would look into recording it in case anything further happens but aside from that I wouldn’t lose sleep over it. My partners friend sent him something once as an apparent joke. It was weird and unsettling until we got to the bottom of who had sent it!

JustUseTheDoorSanta · 08/01/2022 07:29

@Needrichangemynameagain

What is address quirk?
Curiosity about what that is is reasonable, but the quirk might be identifying. I used to know a house with a quirk, so will give it as an example for OP to say if it's similar. The road didn't have a name, so the post office proper address was the house name, hamlet name, nearby village name, county, postcode. Locals called it "Back Road", used the old county name instead and rarely added the village name that was 1 mile away as they would put "near Town Name" for a town 5 miles away instead. Upshot was that you'd look at any addressed letter and know if it was from a local or not.
katkitty · 08/01/2022 07:41

It must have been horrible to recieve that. You seem quite worried about it to have posted here. But what are you hoping to get out of the thread? Nobody here can tell you what exactly has occured.Only have you overthinking and being wound up over potential scenarios!

I don't think it's safe to say you can treat it as you would any other nasty remark, as in ignore and move on with your life. This is someone who has gone out of their way to send you something in quite an anonymous, threatening way! Your best bet is to contact the police who have the skills to deal with these sorts of cases.

AlDanvers · 08/01/2022 07:45

Given the address quirk its likey to be someone local.

Given you have had relationships with men, I am guessing it being a prank/the mailing office etc are very small.

But if its someone local and they know your history that would suggest they have done a fair amount of digging into your history perhaps even speaking to exs or other people you have told about this. I am also guessing they presume your wife doesn't know about your sexual history. If they have dug into your past, it's really really concerning.

As I said, it could coincidence and someone has sent this to you and it just so happens you have slept with men before. I just think the chances of this are very very small.

TheRussianDoll · 08/01/2022 08:10

That’s absolutely awful. Someone is trying to upset you/intimidate you. Keep hold of the letter. It’s not nice to know it had been opened at the Mail office, either. I would report it. If there’s anything else, it’s already “logged” with a crime number. This is hate crime.

What a dreadful thing to do. What a world!

Darbs76 · 08/01/2022 08:12

As everyone has said you definitely need to report this. It’s possible Royal Mail have a log if something was inside. It’s always worth reporting this kind of thing.

Chickorma · 08/01/2022 08:12

I'm sorry you've received this, you must he unnerved and confused by it.

I think the word, the drawing and the fact it's handwritten is possibly a red herring, it's a term I've not heard in a long time, which is perhaps why it's been used now, it's not something you'd expect the sender to say/do, a bit of a disguise.

Can you work out why the letter might have been opened? I've had it before where it's been damp and so the envelope has split open. Or could it be that the letter was sent from further afield and the address (as you said it was the old name for the road) wasn't recognized initially so opened for that reason?

I think I watch too many amateur detective shows on the TV!