Do you enjoy staying at peoples houses?

[Cleopatra2022]

Or having people to stay at yours?
Personally, I dislike both! If I have to stay at someone’s house I can’t stay more than 2 nights max. I very rarely invite anyone to stay at ours and if I do it’s for no longer than 3 nights.
MIL on the other hand will stay with us for a week at a time. It drives me crazy and always causes rows with DH and I. It’s just too long and feels very intrusive. Because of how long the visits are I end up making excuses for why she can’t come in order to put off her visit for as long as possible.
She doesn’t seem to have noticed that we are always putting her off with the flimsiest excuses. DH won’t talk to her straight and I tried once but was ignored.
I’m just so confused as to why she’d want to stay so long anyway? Why isn’t she desperate to get home to her own house and bed like I would be?!

So am I unusual in feeling this way?

I find both to be very tiring and stressful. We stayed with family over Christmas and it was exhausting. I actually couldn’t wait to get home and potter.
MIL once stayed with us for ten days one Christmas. That was bad enough in itself, but she also had the nerve to make rude comments to me and interfere with our relationship while she was here. Completely inappropriate.

The deal breaker is the bathroom situation. Sharing with the whole family, a toilet that doesn’t flush more than 2 ounces of piss a one sheet of paper plus no lock, HATE IT, ensuite bathroom or one just for guests makes things far more bearable.

I'm ok at my sister's and sil or one of our DC's for a night and if they stay at ours especially over Christmas.
Otherwise if it's anyone else, I hate it as does dh and can't wait to leave or for them to leave.

I hate both too! I especially don't like staying at other people's houses as I just don't know what to do.

Same here!
I love staying at hotels though but not people's houses. I hate being on my best behaviour ;)

@Movinghouseatlast

I hate both too! I especially don't like staying at other people's houses as I just don't know what to do.

Ye in my own I'm usually on my computer. Can't do that elsewhere :(

Hate it. I like to eat and drink what I like when I like, have a bath when I want and don't like using other people's toilets. But it depends on how comfortable I am with whoever's house it is really.

@TheDrWillSeeYouNow I’m exactly the same. Never loved it before lockdown but tolerated it. Now I really can’t stand it. I can deal with an hour or two at most of people at my house or visiting someone else.

Once we reach proper adulthood 'sleepovers' are no longer fun even in the most beautiful of houses. I can't stand either hosting or staying. I even have a small cottage in our garden and can't even bear that as I can't relax, and fear they will spend the whole time in my house.

We always stay in a hotel or cottage when visiting and enjoy the space and privacy. I really am very sociable and love seeing people - but I also like them to go home!

I love having people to stay. I like to spend the night eating, drinking and everyone can relax and can go to bed whenever they like. I also like cooking breakfast in the morning for everyone.
I do like staying with friends/ family for 2 nights max then I want home to my own house.

I dislike it so much that we put close relatives (my husband's adult children) in the local Travelodge at our expense.

I personally love having people to stay and staying at other peoples houses! Would happily have others over or stay at theirs for a month or so. I think I’m the odd one out though, I’m aware a lot of people hate both for more than a night or two!

We used to have BB guests in our own home; all strangers the first time they stayed, therefore on their best behaviour. It's a large enough house that we didn't share the same space . Breakfast was a slick timed routine before they rushed off to entertain themselves all day and come home tired out. No other meals to provide; we didn't entertain them or take them out and they just got on with their own happy little day. EASY PEASY.

SO much easier than hosting family or friends. Family and friends are pretty much full-time in your face every waking hour ; they want at least 3 meals a day (or worse, they want to cook for us in my kitchen ) and outings and games and endless talk and feelings, and they just want to do some laundry/ fix their bike indoors/ tell you a secret. Our closest friends are a married couple locked in a lifetime contest of wills which is bad enough one the phone ( he said/she said) but exhausting at every turn irl, when all you want them to do is agree on a walk or a coffee shop. Don't even mention friends with children who have missed a very important footie match/birthday party and are going to make sure we all share their sullen pain. Or any who got their outlandish childrearing practices from the dark side of MN.

The idea of staying overnight or a few days in someone elses house has no appeal to me what so ever, and the same re having people here, especially in the winter when l prefer to have early nights and go into hermit mode.

@LoveGrooveDanceParty or maybe you are all in the minority but most people are good at hiding their real feelings when they have guests and aren't brave enough to own up to their introvert tendencies. You dont have to hate people or be a hermit, but a lot of people find it exhausting being around other people so much

I’m not saying you have to be a hermit - my observation is that MN is disproportionately populated by people who hate socialising, so it’s not surprising to see the way this thread has gone.

I'm the same, I won't stay even for a night and don't have people to stay either!

I really like hosting and having house guests and it depends where I'm staying. I love staying at my best friend's, PIL is a lovely set up, their house is over 3 floors and we get the middle one, we get the guest room, DS has his own bedroom and we get a bathroom on the same floor just for us, they have their bedroom and huge en suite on the top floor, so the middle floor is rarely used if we're not there other than the small study. However they have dogs and as lovely as they are I hate coming home and my clothes all smell of dog. Not keen on staying with my parents in winter as my DF thinks 18 degrees is positively balmy...

2 nights max in other people’s houses. Their beds are never as good a mine, often too small, and too often they don’t have proper bedside tables or reading lights (this should be illegal IMO!) not to mention (in winter) the lack of an electric blanket.

I’m always so happy to get home to my own lovely bed.

I don’t mind other people staying for a few days, but a lot will depend on the person, and how ‘easy’ they are. A Swedish friend, Ok for a week. Dh’s wretched Canadian relations, OTOH - never again!

It depends on the guests/hosts. I love staying with my cousin and having her stay, we just gel and neither of us feel like we have to make a super effort, so it feels like break for all of us
We have some friends who are lovely, but quite loud and while I enjoy their company, I’m always pleased when they leave (only they don’t know when to leave and always outstay their welcome)

Hate both.

I like staying away pre kids. Now it's so much work. Never liked hosting even for a dinner!

Don't like either.
I need my alone time.

The only person we would stay more than one night with is my dad, who lives in Devon and gives us lovely beach holidays. But we properly appreciate it, go out all day every day and ask them which - if any - meals they want to eat together. We leave the place immaculate and basically treat it - and thank them - as though we have been staying in holiday accommodation (which it is in high season).

Why are you hinting? Be direct ffs!

"MIL, we'd love for you to stay Friday night and Saturday night. It would be best for us if you could leave after breakfast on Sunday as we have plans. Hope that's ok!"

Job done.