Oh My GOD I’m so embarrassed!! Please tell me you’ve done something similar 😭

[Visitors]

Went to visit DH’s aunt and uncle earlier, we only see them once or twice a year. Lovely people but a little dry and very slightly eccentric.
We arrived, they opened the door, we were probably slightly too ebullient with the ‘hello’s’ and ‘lovely to see you’s’ and I went ahead to uncle and said

‘Ah and look at you with glittery jumper on!!’

They both looked at me really oddly and as soon as I said it I could see that actually the ‘glitter’ was an awful lot of dandruff on his dark jumper.

How I didn’t vomit with shame, I literally stopped breathing. Nothing was said but I genuinely felt weak as I followed them into the lounge.

I then spent the next hour with burning cheeks and desperately trying not to look at the dandruff on his jumper.

Please tell me you’ve done worse…I feel I’ll just thinking about it now 😥😢

We’ve all done stuff like that.
I once asked a woman when her baby was due. She said I’m not pregnant!
I felt soo awful but in my defence she was the most pregnant looking woman I’ve ever seen including those who were about to give birth!
I felt absolutely awful to have embarrassed her.
Her mum was with her and said
I told uou that’s not normal !
Hopefully she got it checked out. My husband still teases me about it now !

Omg that is hilarious.. but I feel so sorry for you!

My ex couldn't remember his grandparents names when we went to visit.. so I just called them Grandma and Grandad. Proper dropped him I'm it so they didn't think I was being rude. He died of shame and I got on with them like a house on fire 🔥

I used to waitress in a pub (I was 20 or so) and I was asked to seat two customers who were waiting at the bar. They had their backs to me so I happily marched over asking as I went if ‘would you two ladies like to follow me to be seated at your table’
as I went. Only to find that the two customers both with long flowing blonde hair were in fact a man and a woman #veryawkward

I was rather pleased with some glass flutes that I’d bought from a charity shop. My friend bluntly pointed out they were the ones they used to give away for free at the Esso garage. Thanks for that.

At a family engagement party...
"Oh what a good idea to roll u the carpet & use the underlay-saves any expensive stains".
That was the carpet 😧

Oh my god I think everyone I know has had one of these nightmares happen, one that still makes me laugh to this day is,
I went to knock for my friend as we wearing going for a day out, front door opens
I say 'hey Dave would you please tell your sis I'm here'.
Thinking her brother had answered the door, I got this stern look back, it was her mum,
She'd had a bad hair bleaching disaster resulting in her shaving her head and dying it dark, to be fair to me her kids all looked like her and I never realised how much her sons looked just like her until she cut all her hair off.

DH is a postie. Delivering a huge pile of cards to an address, as he handed them over he smiled broadly and asked "someone's birthday?"
No. The lady's husband had died. He apologised profusely, was utterly mortified and has never made that mistake again!

@RachaelN

Omg that is hilarious.. but I feel so sorry for you!

My ex couldn't remember his grandparents names when we went to visit.. so I just called them Grandma and Grandad. Proper dropped him I'm it so they didn't think I was being rude. He died of shame and I got on with them like a house on fire 🔥

I don't understand. He couldn't remember his grandparents' names? So you couldn't be introduced? That's an odd one.

@PunchedTit4ASoul

Very impressive quick retort! I am known for being quick witted. I only ever do it to people who deserve it though. This guy has a big schnoz and y'know what's good for the goose and all that. 🤷🏿‍♀️ To be honest I did laugh and act all.breezy but my feelings were genuinely hurt. I used to chat and exchange stories with him so when he was so rude about me in such a glib manner it really baffled me. I was polite and pleasant to him afterwards but yeah it wasn't the same anymore. Sorry for waffling

You aren't waffling, he was really imperious and high handed, it wasn't just the calling you MP but the treating you as a servant. Good on you, so few times in life do we get that kind of chance for a comeback

I went to a work colleague's wedding. Only after I gave her the gift & card did I realise that I had written it to her & her previous boyfriend ".

DH and I were in a pub garden talking to another couple, DH asked the lady when the baby was due!!!of course she wasn’t pregnant just very well padded. She burst into tears. He couldn’t apologise enough. To add insult to injury her husband said ‘see I told you that you were fat’. Not sure how things went when they got home!!!

Asked a manager if the other manager was pregnant... She was not! It was super awkward.

A little girl was in my shop and her coat sleeve was hanging down,I bent down and said “where’s your little hand”and reached inside,the little thing had no hand,I could have died on the spot,luckily her Mum was lovely about it.

Went to a Christmas shopping event in the evening at a very fancy interiors store. Wondered what the horrendous smell following me around was, decided it must be DC and spent time all flustered and moaning about the dirty looks we were getting from some of the well to do shoppers. Got home realised I had been traipsing round with dog poo on the top of my shoe

Well a medical professional finished a telephone consultation the other week by saying love you to me as they put the phone down . I bet they were cringing butI just laughed because more than once I have signed off a text message to a professional person with a kiss or two.
You have to laugh .

Several times I have phoned a client and when they've answered asked to speak to their wife only to discover it is actually the wife but one with a very gruff voice. I'm always mortified and make an excuse that the line is bad. I tend to be much more careful now!

Many years ago as a student with a group of friends one of whom was completely deaf. We'd been out at a huge student party event, she'd taken out her hearing aid as she lip reads anyway, we'd all gotten very drunk but somehow she was really really bad. Her boyfriend panicked and we ended up at A&E. Cue incoming nurse..... (she used her real name but I'm going with drunk girl coz outing!) "hello, drunk girl, time to wake up now" in a semi loud voice. I start giggling, boyfriend tries to interrupt nurse to explain that she can't hear, but nurse turns round gives us all a death glare and continues, louder "hellllooooooooo, drunk girl, come on now, time to wake up...." of course there's no answer. I've now got tears running down my face I'm laughing so hard, boyfriend starts trying to tell the nurse again, and instead nurse interrupts "I don't understand why you find this so funny, poor girl......" shouting now "drunk girl, hellllooooooooo...." I am literally dying as are the rest of us...... At which point the boyfriend fed up of being interrupted shouts over the top of the nurse's loud attempts at trying to rouse her "she's bloody stone deaf, can't hear a word.....!!"
Ill never, ever forget the poor nurses face. We did try to tell her...... 🤷🏻‍♀️

I once told a chap to be careful walking his dogs near seals as their bite can cause nasty infections ....my friend informed he was the local vet!

My manager arrived one morning and I said “oh gosh is it raining out” as her hair was ‘wet’… it wasn’t wet she’d over done a coconut oil treatment

I had one happen to me! Someone asked me if I have chicken pox but I was just having a bad skin day with a couple of spots, he was mortified

I realised that a woman who was a speaker at a work conference was someone I was probably going to be doing a project with, so I thought I would wait until after her speech and introduce myself. The thing was she looked the absolute image of my neighbour, but she had blonde hair instead of brown - I noticed she also had a bit of a beard / facial hair. I was pleased to finally get to speak to her, and, what I meant to say was "it's lovely to meet you, you look just like my neighbour, except you have got blonde hair". But because I was nervous and overthinking not trying not to refer to the facial hair, what I actually said was 'you look just like my neighbour, except you have got a b.....' then stopped completely and just gaped in horror. The worst thing was I could hear it coming out of my mouth in horrific slow mo in my head. She looked at me in confusion as if I was complete barking, and then moved on fairly quickly to talk to someone else. I'm actually red in the face now thinking back to it.

I worked in retail and did a fair bit of store swapping. There was a young girl at one store who had the same surname as a lady at another store. Asked the lady if she was her grandmother. Noppeeee she was her mother and really quite annoyed at me. I wanted the ground to swallow me up

Complimented a colleague who’d just returned from sick leave on her new hairdo. Turned out it was a wig following chemotherapy. Luckily she thought it was hysterically funny

Years ago. New job. Being introduced to colleagues. Shook hands with one man, did it catch his name but heard “……Darling. Looking forward to working with you”
I replied”well I’m sure we’ll get along fine as long as you never call me darling again”
He then said “ I didn’t. My surname is Darling”
I wanted to die 😱

At a work Christmas party once, and one of my colleagues was leaving early. She had quite a short dress on, so when she put her coat on it was covered up. I didn’t need to comment on this, but of course instead I said loudly “you look like you’re going dogging!”
Everyone seemed to find it amusing, even though it wasn’t, and I did apologise!
There will be other occasions, but I have blocked them from my memory…..