Friend is hijacking our weekend away with her Body Shop shite

[Youngatheart00]

In a fortnights time DH and I are going away with some other friends for a weekend away in a cottage. One of my friends has recently joined the Body shop cult at home and has been pushing it any excuse she gets.

She’s now suggested the girls in the group have a ‘pamper evening’ which basically just means her trying to sell to us. Of the 8 of us, 2 have already said ‘great idea can’t wait’ and another ive spoken to isn’t keen on the products but wants to support her. I don’t want to fall out over this but I really don’t want to waste a Saturday night when I don’t agree with MLM and hate what it’s doing to my friend!!

How to approach this tactfully?

Agree wholeheartedly with PPs. Say No and mean it.

It's really shitty to use a friends weekend to make money out of people. And I'd say that.

I'd say 'What?! On our only Saturday night together in ages?! You've got to be kidding, I'm off down the pub'.

I'd say 'I find Body Shop a bit tacky for Christmas presents and prefer to buy something better quality for my friends,' if she really pushes you.

I would reply now and say, MLMs are not for me and neither is the body shop so I will be joining the men instead. She doesn't care about spoiling the evening selling her stuff so I wouldn't care about not being forced to put up with it all.

I would hate this, I think it’s bloody cheeky. Are the men folk going to be staying in playing pool or going out?

I’d reply, ‘ooh, I’m not a Body Shop fan so I’ll opt out if that one, I think!’

Strange that all the other friends are happy to go along with her sales pitch.

As she has suggested a ‘pamper’ evening can you agree with that idea and suggest that as your idea of pampering yourself is a glass or two of wine/plate of cheese/funny film etc etc that that is what you’ll contribute to the evening. Eg: . “Great idea to have a night for some time for ourselves. Thanks to X for providing a shopping opportunity for those who need xmas presents; I’ll bring a bottle of bubbly and some nail polish for some manicures/a few board games…” or whatever. Perhaps others will make similar suggestions and then when it comes time to sell you can politely move on quickly once she’s made her pitch to whatever else you’ve all bought

Actually in response to 'don't forget your wallets'' I would be blunt and say this is meant to be a fun weekend away not a gard-selling pitch for your MLM business.

@NoThankYouSaurus

FGS, why does mums net automatically hide archived links? I've just tried to link the Bodyshop tweet to JKR. But basically, they kicked the woman straight after she had published details of the domestic violence she had suffered, having egregiously been accused of transphobia for tweeting in support of women being able to use the word woman when talking about menstruation. I would not give a penny to them or your friend, MLMs are cults and turn sane people into utter arseholes.

Seconded!

She’s literally now posted on our group that she’ll be ‘taking orders for gifts so don’t forget your wallet ladies’ - I am pretty pissed off that a group of great friends getting together for the first time since pre covid is being used as a sales opportunity

I would directly say - I don't want to spend an evening on what's supposed to be a fun weekend away being sold stuff I don't want. There's nothing pampering about a sales pitch. It's not on to hijack our weekend for this.

I'm so sorry, OP. YANBU, obviously.

I have been to one or two of these evenings, I was always told that there was 'no pressure to buy' etc (I know they have to say that, but of course I took it literally and never bought anything.)

A co-worker of mine does BS (great acronym eh) at home and thankfully doesn't push too much, but my standard line is that I have brands I like and I already have too much of it at home, which is also true. I always seem to have a few tubs of body butter of some sort around, and tbh I don't like most of the scents from BS.

Anyway is there a way that you can plan an actual activity during or after all of this? Because it's absolute bullshit that the guys get to drink and play pool whilst you all have to sit through a sales pitch.

Why approach it? Enjoy the pamper night and don’t buy anything!

I am pretty pissed off that a group of great friends getting together for the first time since pre covid is being used as a sales opportunity

I would tell her exactly this. There is no way I would keep quiet.

I’d put on the group ‘sounds lovely Joanne!! Why don’t we do this for an hour while we get ready for dinner… nibbles, Prosecco… we could try stuff, buy a couple of bits etc if we want to? Then have dinner and hang out with kids/partners? Happy to go with the flow… what does anyone else think??”

Like you i really disagree with MLMs. This could be a good low key compromise though?

Christ that really isn’t the place for it. I’d say body shop stuff isn’t my thing so I’ll be giving it a miss

V rude of your friend. I’d be upfront in requesting not to do it, eg ‘let’s not mix business with a friends’ social weekend’ if the majority disagree would then attend but not buy anything.

Would point to anyone suggesting you’re ‘unsupportive’ that it’s not ‘supportive’ to encourage a friend to lose money in an MLM set up.

@Yourdeadtome

Because a pamper night from an MLM host isnt a pamper night. Its sale sale sale. It isnt enjoyable.

I would just be blunt about it saying you won’t be buying anything and why. Tbh the other girls in the group are probably thinking the same just to scared to say anything

@IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves

I've already done all mine. I think me and DH will go out for a meal that night and leave you to it.

yup this. meal in pub where some can tag along/ join you later. also order something from her for £20 or so, choose a generic popular thing that she'll definitely stock.

you have to watch your back here a bit I think, don't want any negative mumbling about you from anyone.

I bet if you post something saying no, other people reading it will be pleased!

Better to say something now than let it blow up on the night.

I dealt with something similar by saying I didn't like mixing friendship with money BTW.

What a CF. I don't blame you for being pissed off OP.

I have a strong aversion to MLM and have in the past simply said exactly that 'Thanks for the invite but I don't agree with how MLM companies work so won't be coming or supporting it by sharing' but in fairness that has been to acquaintances, not sure how I'd deal with it if it were a friend.

In your case I would either be blunt and say you're not comfortable with a friendly get-together becoming a sales pitch, or just say you don't fancy a pamper evening so you're going to go out with your DH / the Men that night.

This would really annoy me too, she is a CF & you are right that she is hijacking your weekend away. If it was a good friend I would probably just buy a mascara or something small because I wouldn’t want to ruin the weekend but I’d be fuming about it.
I also hate the thought of pamper parties.

@Stovetopespresso yup this. meal in pub where some can tag along/ join you later. also order something from her for £20 or so, choose a generic popular thing that she'll definitely stock.

No - dont buy ANYTHING!!!

Tricky but I think the best thing is to be upfront and just say it’s not your thing from the off
I have supported MLM friends in the past cos I thought I should and the truth is if you buy something they then have it in their heads that you might buy more. Kinder to her to just make it clear you’re not interested. No need to make it personal you just don’t like body shop stuff generally