Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Friend is hijacking our weekend away with her Body Shop shite

698 replies

Youngatheart00 · 07/11/2021 15:44

In a fortnights time DH and I are going away with some other friends for a weekend away in a cottage. One of my friends has recently joined the Body shop cult at home and has been pushing it any excuse she gets.

She’s now suggested the girls in the group have a ‘pamper evening’ which basically just means her trying to sell to us. Of the 8 of us, 2 have already said ‘great idea can’t wait’ and another ive spoken to isn’t keen on the products but wants to support her. I don’t want to fall out over this but I really don’t want to waste a Saturday night when I don’t agree with MLM and hate what it’s doing to my friend!!

How to approach this tactfully?

OP posts:
WallaceinAnderland · 07/11/2021 16:30

I've been to various different 'parties' selling stuff - remember pampered chef? I just go along, drink some wine, eat their nibbles, test out their free stuff and leave without buying anything. It's ok, a nice enough free evening with friends. No-one is making you buy anything. If you just don't want to go at all, don't go. Watch Netflix in your room or read a book to go to the pub, whatever you want to do. I don't see the issue really.

SweetBabyCheeses99 · 07/11/2021 16:32

I actually really like the idea of a pamper evening (although perhaps more of a Sunday activity than a Saturday one) - however this is just going to be a lot of pushy selling isn’t it!

I also love some of their products but have avoided them since their really crass tweeting at JK Rowling last year.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 07/11/2021 16:32

I am pretty pissed off that a group of great friends getting together for the first time since pre covid is being used as a sales opportunity

I don't blame you - it's disgraceful, predatory behaviour. What should be a daft, relaxing weekend is going to turn into a captive market for her - and you are paying for the [rovolege by wasting one of your much-anticipated evenings.

I'll bet the others feel the same but nobody wants to look like the one who is the "meanie". I'd tell her and the others that you won't be participating because you think that Body Shop is sh*te since it changed hands and you don't believe its ethos is what it used to be. You have been looking forward to a totally relaxing weekend without any pressure, especially about Christmas which starts far too early. Tell her straight that you won't be buying anything. Then read up on stuff so that when she mentions a product you can say "That macadamia nut body butter - 32 orang-utans were made homeless for every three tubs"; Passion fruit face cream -6 okapis died for that" "Orchid and gladiolus bath balm - 17 rare species became extinct." etc

Make her really work for that commission. Grin

Ideally none of the others would have heard about it, but she's obviously made sure they did,.

FilledSoda · 07/11/2021 16:33

I think it's fine to say it's not really your thing and just opt out.
She is a cf though.

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 07/11/2021 16:36

@WallaceinAnderland

I've been to various different 'parties' selling stuff - remember pampered chef? I just go along, drink some wine, eat their nibbles, test out their free stuff and leave without buying anything. It's ok, a nice enough free evening with friends. No-one is making you buy anything. If you just don't want to go at all, don't go. Watch Netflix in your room or read a book to go to the pub, whatever you want to do. I don't see the issue really.
Big difference between being invited to a MLM evening - when you can choose whether to go and when to leave - vs your weekend away with mates being hijacked.
Lovelydovey · 07/11/2021 16:37

Reply to that latest message and say that you aren’t interested in a sales pitch and will make other plans for that night.

Sleepyquest · 07/11/2021 16:37

Eurgh how cringe. This is why I would never get involved in MLM, who wants to be constantly trying to sell stuff to their friends!?

I also hate when they coin the term 'my small business'. It is anything but their business!

Anyway, it sounds like maybe you can't get out of it. She should feel pretty embarrassed to be cornering you all. I would just say that you are only buying secondhand this Christmas, or doing a secret Santa or some other made up excuse.

BonesInTheOcean · 07/11/2021 16:39

@WallaceinAnderland

I've been to various different 'parties' selling stuff - remember pampered chef? I just go along, drink some wine, eat their nibbles, test out their free stuff and leave without buying anything. It's ok, a nice enough free evening with friends. No-one is making you buy anything. If you just don't want to go at all, don't go. Watch Netflix in your room or read a book to go to the pub, whatever you want to do. I don't see the issue really.
not exactly the point of a weekend away with friends though, OP could stay home and do that?

She’s literally now posted on our group that she’ll be ‘taking orders for gifts so don’t forget your wallet ladies’ - I am pretty pissed off that a group of great friends getting together for the first time since pre covid is being used as a sales opportunity

I'd reply with 'I don't support MLMs as they are manipulative and exploitative. Hopefully you haven't invested too much in this. Can I suggest you do this at a later time/date, as we only have 2 evenings to get together and you can get people who are interested to attend'

depending on my mood, I would possibly say this weekend has cost us £200, so if you want me to attend, that will be £100

TatianaBis · 07/11/2021 16:40

I’m reasonably good at pool so I’d be doing that instead.

No interest in body shop stuff.

InFiveMins · 07/11/2021 16:40

Things like this really piss me off. She isn't considering anyone else when planning this 'pamper evening', so don't consider her when telling everyone you'll give that a miss and go out for the evening instead.

Notaroadrunner · 07/11/2021 16:40

So the men are going to the pub while the little women are staying in to mind the kids and be forced into a night of being bled dry by this CF? Fuck that. If I was going away for a weekend I'd expect the group to stay together and go for a meal and would not be happy if dh left me to stay back minding kids. Why not just text to the group that work should be left behind, as this weekend is a chance to get away from all that and enjoy yourselves. Suggest you all find a family activity that can include everyone - bowling, board games or even watching paint dry!

MonsignorMirth · 07/11/2021 16:41

If you really want to start a fight you could mention you don't agree with how the Body Shop responded to JK Rowling's account of domestic violence (among other things) with a tweet being rude and promoting their bath bombs.... really insensitive. That's why I've stopped buying the products I liked from them!

EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 07/11/2021 16:41

But to preserve friendships in your case I'd probably just go with super sensitive skin, stick with known brands/items only.

'No' is a complete answer without reasons given. MLM coaches and uplines just encourage people to overcome the reasons. It's not unknown for people to misrepresent the hypoallergenicity of products in order to secure a sale.

KerryWeaver · 07/11/2021 16:41

@5zeds

So post back on Facebook and say you really don’t want to buy body shop stuff on a Saturday night with friends, could we do something else?
This.
NoThankYouSaurus · 07/11/2021 16:41

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

2bazookas · 07/11/2021 16:42

That's the night you're watching a film with X/ getting an early night.

Or you just say " No. I don't like the brand you're flogging."

samsalmon · 07/11/2021 16:42

It’s never too soon in life to learn to say ‘it’s not my thing but thanks for the invitation and have a lovely time’. Polite boundary setting all the way.

RantyAunty · 07/11/2021 16:43

Politely opt out. Allergies, skint, animal rights, etc.

I bet others don't want a sales night either.

Lovelyricepudding · 07/11/2021 16:44

How about going in full throttle over the pamper evening and suggest contacting a local Spa to see if they can do facials and offering to bring along some products from x that you have found to be good. And your friend has given you the Avon catalogue too...

NoThankYouSaurus · 07/11/2021 16:45

FGS, why does mums net automatically hide archived links? I've just tried to link the Bodyshop tweet to JKR. But basically, they kicked the woman straight after she had published details of the domestic violence she had suffered, having egregiously been accused of transphobia for tweeting in support of women being able to use the word woman when talking about menstruation. I would not give a penny to them or your friend, MLMs are cults and turn sane people into utter arseholes.

ImUninsultable · 07/11/2021 16:45

'Sorry. Really dont want to spend one night of my weekend away having sales pitch. We've not all seen each other properly since covid. This really isnt a sales opportunity.
Happy to have a pamper night in with wine but I'm not joining in any kind of sales pitch so let me know which it is. I'll go to the pub if you're flogging stuff."

You really dont need to be kind and nice about this. I guarantee there are others who do not want to do it. Someone just had to say it first.

MLMshouldbeillegal · 07/11/2021 16:46

Well my user name pretty much sums up my feelings on the matter.

No, people don't make money. Fewer than 1%. And most of them are in Utah. MLM bots will lie through their teeth though, and some truly believe that turnover and profit are exactly the same thing. Hmm

I'm not surprised she's rubbing her hands in glee at the thought of a captive market who she can guilt trip into buying her shite. Agree with the other posters, you just have to say it's not your cup of tea, or that you we thinking a movie night would be fun, or that you've decided to save the planet and just buy second hand for Christmas.

neededafart · 07/11/2021 16:47

@ImUninsultable

'Sorry. Really dont want to spend one night of my weekend away having sales pitch. We've not all seen each other properly since covid. This really isnt a sales opportunity. Happy to have a pamper night in with wine but I'm not joining in any kind of sales pitch so let me know which it is. I'll go to the pub if you're flogging stuff."

You really dont need to be kind and nice about this. I guarantee there are others who do not want to do it. Someone just had to say it first.

This is exactly how it needs to be worded. No bullshit about animal testing/allergies etc.

Your friend is being a knob.

Tbf a pamper evening would be a nice idea, face masks wine etc. But tell her straight NO to the sales pitch

Interrobanger · 07/11/2021 16:48

It’s really really rude of her. I wouldn’t worry about being seen to be difficult of hurt her feelings. She’s got a brass neck trying to turn a nice weekend away into an earning opportunity.

How tacky.

itsallgoingpearshaped · 07/11/2021 16:48

@GreenClock

“Body Shop isn’t really my thing so I’ll be joining the men in the pub, but i hope you enjoy.”

I bet you won’t be the only woman from your group in the pub that night by the way.

She’s embarrassed herself. Cringey.

This, exactly this. Just tell them you'll be hanging out with the men then, as they won't be expected to stump up for beauty products or sit through the agonizing sales pitch.