Keep me company a while and chat idle crap? A hand hold please

[bloodywhitecat]

DH has cancer, we know he is for palliative care only but he has been doing well (until his most recent scan showed some growth on an existing tumour and some new ones in his liver). His care has been crap, he hasn't seen a doctor in a year, all his appointments have been by phone.

Last week he developed a pain in his calf, and it hasn't got any better. Yesterday I complained to a lovely nurse at our surgery. I said I felt completely alone and failed by the whole system. I also mentioned the pain in his calf and said I was worried about a DVT. Within 10 minutes I had a call to say the GP wanted to see him ASAP. They did a blood test at 4.30pm and today we had a call to say his D-dimer is raised so he is now on his way to hospital.

I feel so alone. I have no-one to turn to. Macmillan have been fucking useless. Friends have pulled away as we seemed to be doing OK and DH has survived his original 6 months prognosis. I don't want to worry my kids, DD is a teacher and can't just come here at the drop of a hat and I would rather poke my eyes out with a blunt poker than tell my mother. I am trying to keep a smile on my face because the babies are still awake but inside I am shit scared this is the start of the decline for DH.

Tell me your dull news, good or bad?

I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP

My idle chat is I have only today discovered that you can get clear (!!!) post-it notes so you can still see the page underneath.
Just have to find an excuse to buy them now but as a SAHM, I’m finding it a bit difficult to find a reason I need them

@Kentuckycarby

I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP

My idle chat is I have only today discovered that you can get clear (!!!) post-it notes so you can still see the page underneath.
Just have to find an excuse to buy them now but as a SAHM, I’m finding it a bit difficult to find a reason I need them

You can never have too many post it notes.... I love them! 😂

Clear post it notes? How did I not know about this?

I forgot to send you OP

I don’t really have any dull news to share (which is in itself dull, I suppose) but I just wanted to say how sorry I am to read this. You were very kind to me once on a thread I posted under a different username and I still remember it when I see you on here.

for you, your husband and your family x

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. I made kebabs for dinner tonight with loads of red cabbage and onion. It was healthy and tasty.

I'm now considering chocolate.

hugs lovely

the right size school shoes DD needed were back in stock, they were bought, they came, they fit!

Kids are having bolognese again tonight for dinner.
I made such a huge pot of it last week the MN chicken were blushing in embarrassment.
we had several extra teens over on Thursday, we all had spag bol then they all had more at 4am😳
Since then various people (9 of us here) had various amounts at various times and there's still so much left.
I have no freezer space for all of it so....kids, guess what's for dinner?

DS3 said a while ago he could eat it every day for a week and not get bored - so far we are 8 for 7🤣

what else?
have you seen Elementary on Prime? it's good

sending unMN hugs. Crappy unco-ordinated care is the last you need. The best thing about this site is handholding and bollocksy pointless chat is something many excel in.

Clear Post It notes???? Everyone I know is getting those for Christmas then.

My major achievement today wasn't turning our dog into a bouffant fuzz ball at the groomers. It's been making flapjack that is tasty and not crumbly or like toffee after my kitchen scales broke after measuring the 1st ingredient.

I’m sorry about your DH. I hope you can both get more help.

My 82 yr dad had a mini stroke nearly a year ago. It affected his speech a bit. I have done speech therapy almost every day with him for nearly a year. I am sick to death of selling shells in the Seychelles, betty and her butter, and moses and his toeses - but I will gladly carry on because it has / does help and he is lonely at home as mum is in a care home.

💐 for you.

DH was diagnosed with atrial fibrilation at the start of lockdown and still isn't better 19 months on........ his care has been shockingly bad, and that's with dipping in and out of private when needed. I can't even begin to imagine how frustrated you both are.

On a happier note, I took the dogs straight out for a walk after work..... it was bitterly cold but the sky had an amazing tinge of pink and the sunset was one just to stand and watch.

I hope your DH is home soon and has some answers

I remember your original post about your DH. I often wonder how your family were getting on. I’m so sorry to hear you’ve had such a horrible experience. It’s pretty much the same experience I had. It’s just sh1t.

Sending you the biggest internet hug ((()))

I managed a 3 mile run today after dropping my daughter off in record time. I deliberating if I should get a bottle of wine to counteract my hard work as

1. Its freezing and I have a fire on and it feels like a nice glass of red is missing
2. I have no grown up company until much later
3. I ran today so I deserve it
4. My children are subjecting me to watching Captain Underpants and I need a hit to get me through the next hour of the film

I pretended I couldn't go to the nursery bonfire play (why's that a thing?!) because I had to work and literally just bumped into the nursery owner in Sainsbury's holding a basket full of wine. I backed away slowly. Although on thinking about it further, why wasn't she there too?!?

Flowers for you Op, I'll be thinking of you and wish you all the best

I'm so sorry about your DH and the shitty care he's receiving.

My dull news is that I'm now day 6 since testing positive with covid and I can taste sweet/salty now so I've spent the day eating very sweet baileys profiteroles and very salty crisps

@Kentuckycarby

I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP

My idle chat is I have only today discovered that you can get clear (!!!) post-it notes so you can still see the page underneath.
Just have to find an excuse to buy them now but as a SAHM, I’m finding it a bit difficult to find a reason I need them

Oh my! You could write on them in Sharpie 🥰 Idle news is that I’ve just been out to buy pâté to tempt the dog to have her meds and bought myself a take away of chips. Bit disappointing as they were kebab shop not fish and chips shop chip. Currently listening to 6 o’clock radio 4 comedy and trying to suppress rising waves of anger as it’s so awful. Can’t even tell it to stfu as it’s not via Alexa but the TV and aforesaid pâté filled dog is on my lap.

I got drenched cycling home from work today.
now curled up on the sofa in my pj's and with a hot water bottle.
I sending some of my warm comfort to you

I had a weights class on Tuesday and the sadistic aussie instructor made us do some many squats my legs are still killing me. I snuck into the jacuzzi while the kids had their swimming lesson, which helped a bit.

I'm starting a new job in a couple of weeks. Rather nervous as the current one is so lovely witch such nice colleagues. One of them rang me today to tell me she had done lots of work with the team in the org I'm moving to and they were absolutely lovely with very flexible working. It made me a little teary - both to have such positive news and that she made the effort to ring and reassure me like that.

My 6 year old is reading me a bedtime story atm. She does the voices so well. I'm really enjoying my story

Hope that we can cheer you up

Bumped my head on the car boot oowch
I've got a cold, so not very coordinated today

Went food shopping & bought a reduced apple pie
Found a tin of chocolate custard in the cupboard
Looking forward to this eating later

Random distractions:
I've just made a vat of vegetable chilli to go with the vat of pulled pork and many many hotdogs being served at the village bonfire tomorrow. The vat of pulled pork is rather small, as Tesco failed to deliver two pork shoulders I planned to use. So a demijohn of pulled pork, perhaps. We'll feed about 300 people tomorrow.

The dog made a valiant attempt to get some dog treats I stashed on the table to reward him for sitting nicely while I worked.

DS1 cooked dinner tonight. I looked at it, torn between delight that someone else had cooked, and anxiety about all the calories that sneak in when I'm not cooking!

Sorry to hear about your DH and that you are unsupported.

The highlight of my day was going to an eye test and finding out, if I only had my weaker eye, I would still be able to get a car and HGV driving licence. One eyed me would have to wear glasses (a monocle?!) to get a pilot’s license! I know I’ve had no input into my impressive eyesight but I’m feeling smug anyway.

CLEAR POST-IT NOTES????
(goes into a massive perfect-stationery-induced faint)

Thank you, each and every one of you for your kindness. I am delaying putting my big boy (18 months) to bed because he is such a little character and he is keeping me entertained and distracted right now. He learned to walk this week (after being told he might never walk and would not develop as he should) and with walking has come communication. "Eese" means "feed me and feed me now!"

Would you do local caters group be helpful? I don’t really consider myself a carer (ASD son) but the county group has quite a good budget and runs all sorts of training/subsidised breakfast meets etc.

I know I am not feeling 100% due to this cold

I didn't buy the out if date reduced M&Ms chocolate bars or any other reduced chocolate

I have a very sweet tooth !

I'm so sorry.

Everything's lovely and chilled here, DS2's doing god knows what in their room, DS3's in our room with me watching YouTube, I'm on MN, roleplaying on Twitter, making Picrews and playing The Walking Dead.

@bloodywhitecat

Thank you, each and every one of you for your kindness. I am delaying putting my big boy (18 months) to bed because he is such a little character and he is keeping me entertained and distracted right now. He learned to walk this week (after being told he might never walk and would not develop as he should) and with walking has come communication. "Eese" means "feed me and feed me now!"

This thread has made me laugh and cry. I love the post it notes, bumping into nursery worker with all the wine and the putting together of a kit that's located in the four corners of the earth.

But this post op, it's beautiful.

I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you and your dh op and feel angry on your behalf about the crap medical care. Sending strength to get you through the evening

This afternoon I have ridden my big hairy horse through a lot of mud. The clean up took hours! I am now shaking with hunger and the fire is out so think I may opt for a microwave meal on the sofa wrapped in a blanket and when I have strength I will bring in wood and have a lavender scented bubble bath which my eighteen year old bought me to apologise for borrowing my gilet and losing it on the tram.