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Original poster

Sarah Everard thread 2

343 replies

HangingOver · 30/09/2021 12:28

Keep venting.

Original thread here www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/4362028-Anyone-follow-the-coverage-of-the-Sarah-Everard-case-today-and-want-to-vent?pg=1

OP posts:
5BlackDoors · 30/09/2021 18:16

I also still want to know why his work nickname was 'the rapist'.

I want to know why in detail. Because locker room bantz as an explanation doesn't cut it.

eeyore228 · 30/09/2021 18:17

Education needs to start at home. There was a thread here a little while back about whether as a parent you would report your DS for a crime - as I recall it was sexual assault. There were many parents who actually admitted they would lie to protect their DS. We need to do better by education our children and not excusing their behaviour, as hard as it might be. It's a start.

MrsRobbieHart · 30/09/2021 18:21

@5BlackDoors

I also still want to know why his work nickname was 'the rapist'.

I want to know why in detail. Because locker room bantz as an explanation doesn't cut it.

I agree. I want to know too. Rapist is a very serious word and it’s one most men fear ever being lobbied at them. I can’t imagine many bandying it about at their mates repeatedly to the point at which it sticks and becomes their nickname unless there is very good reason for that name being used. Actually, I can’t imagine any of the men I know using it for anyone they liked and considered an actual friend. So maybe there is something in that. Maybe none of his colleagues liked him at all.
Claudethecat · 30/09/2021 18:23

@5BlackDoors

I also still want to know why his work nickname was 'the rapist'.

I want to know why in detail. Because locker room bantz as an explanation doesn't cut it.

Me too.
Bagelsandbrie · 30/09/2021 18:37

Re the rapist nickname, there is a whole underclass of men who find this sort of shit funny. It’s not funny. Obviously. But I’ve worked in rough pubs and very rough areas where people do laugh about this sort of thing - similarly to dare I say it in the inbetweeners where they have “paedo Kennedy” the padeophile teacher they all laugh about and then he tries to groom Neil (climbs into bed with him) and it’s supposed to be funny. This shit is absolutely not funny. Not at all and we need to stop finding humour in the most disgusting of things and situations.

MrsRobbieHart · 30/09/2021 18:39

The thing with “pedo Kennedy” is because he is in fact a pedo, and they know it.

Dobbyafreeelf · 30/09/2021 18:47

@Gimlisaxe

My other thing generally, is when I get angry (practically all the time) I do wonder why it is women are talking about this, wondering how we can solve it. Why are men not having this same conversation.

I get it, that its because we are the ones being hurt and we want to stop that for ourselves, our mums, daughters and sisters. But as I have seen and said myself, why is it down to women to stop male violence.

If they want to yell its not all men, then why don't they prove it with coming up with more sensible ideas than them having a curfew, or my brilliant idea, of making them all wearing signs, saying things like I make sexist jokes, I stay silent when other men make these jokes.

Why has yet another problem about men been dumped on us again, without them doing anything other than yell its not all of us.

Absolutely. Could not agree more.
peaceanddove · 30/09/2021 18:53

I think that a condition of release for every single sexual offender should be physical castration. No exceptions. If that was enforced I bet an awful lot of bastards would quite easily curb their 'uncontrollable' urges.

Ironfloor269 · 30/09/2021 19:02

I'm glad the bastard got life in prison. He deserves to live and suffer for his crime. HOWEVER, what a waste of resources - the food, medicine, maintenance of him etc. the state could do without.

Saucery · 30/09/2021 19:10

Nicknames like that are almost a thinly-veiled warning, aren’t they? So when a man does something like indecent exposure his colleagues can all nod and say “I told you so”. But they rarely do anything to stop it, because it’s not really affecting them. They might quietly give a heads-up to female colleagues, which the nickname is also designed to do. What the predator does to women outside the work group isn’t really their concern. After all, violence, rape and murder is always as a result of the female victim’s shit choices, to them.

MrsRobbieHart · 30/09/2021 19:12

@Saucery

Nicknames like that are almost a thinly-veiled warning, aren’t they? So when a man does something like indecent exposure his colleagues can all nod and say “I told you so”. But they rarely do anything to stop it, because it’s not really affecting them. They might quietly give a heads-up to female colleagues, which the nickname is also designed to do. What the predator does to women outside the work group isn’t really their concern. After all, violence, rape and murder is always as a result of the female victim’s shit choices, to them.
Yep. Sounds right.
LikeACatInTheDark · 30/09/2021 19:18

The Sun (if it can be relied on) is reporting that he sexually assaulted a female officer he worked with three years ago, but nothing was done following her complaint.

HarrisMcCoo · 30/09/2021 19:28

As I have remarked on a separate thread, there's got to be more to all this. That's a story just broke not painting Met police in a good light.....Deceived activist Kate Wilson 🙄 I imagine there will be more to come now after the Everard case. Absolutely incredible how corrupt this organisation is.

TeaStory · 30/09/2021 19:29

Funny how many MRAs say it destroys a man’s life to be labelled a rapist.

And yet…

CaveMum · 30/09/2021 19:31

Pretty damning stuff in this article: www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-58755391

Meanwhile, two senior Met officers told London Assembly's Police and Crime Committee they were "not aware" of rumours that Couzens was nicknamed "the rapist" by colleagues.

However, HM Chief Inspector of Constabulary Sir Tom Winsor said the nickname was known by some officers.

Sir Tom, who in his role has responsibility for the inspection of police forces, told the BBC Couzens "also had allegedly a reputation in terms of drug abuse, extreme pornography and other offences of this kind".

HarrisMcCoo · 30/09/2021 19:34

@CaveMum

Pretty damning stuff in this article: www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-58755391

Meanwhile, two senior Met officers told London Assembly's Police and Crime Committee they were "not aware" of rumours that Couzens was nicknamed "the rapist" by colleagues.

However, HM Chief Inspector of Constabulary Sir Tom Winsor said the nickname was known by some officers.

Sir Tom, who in his role has responsibility for the inspection of police forces, told the BBC Couzens "also had allegedly a reputation in terms of drug abuse, extreme pornography and other offences of this kind".

🤢 what a sick f*CK.
Annalouisa · 30/09/2021 19:36

@ohfourfoxache

I don’t disagree with *@Northernlurker* et al - yes, we need to make noise, we need to support each other, we need to call out misogyny

But it feels like none of this is actually working

Do we take to the streets? Glue ourselves to the M25? Write to those in power until there are no words left?

I know I’m not the only one on here who is feeling angry, sad and hopeless today

I think we should take to the streets. Nothing will change at all if we wait for lawmakers, the police force etc. to simply come to their senses. Look at BLM, look at Insulate Britain: short-term disruption gets headlines. Then again, you can argue that neither BLM nor Insulate Britain have brought long-term change (yet), but the movements certainly got attention. Problem is the police find it easy to break up women's protests - remember that poor woman who was arrested (?) at the Sarah Everard vigil?
UrbanRambler · 30/09/2021 19:55

@MariaAngustias Thanks that's interesting to know. I had heard that some paedophiles do volunteer for that treatment, as they genuinely don't want to re-offend and feel remorse about their crimes. Perhaps they are a minority within that group of convicts, but it shows that a few of them can turn their lives around, if they really want to. I don't think that is the case for WC, or the likes of Ian Huntley, though. Some people are beyond redemption.

FuckmyHead · 30/09/2021 19:57

@LikeACatInTheDark

The Sun (if it can be relied on) is reporting that he sexually assaulted a female officer he worked with three years ago, but nothing was done following her complaint.
This wouldn’t surprise me , I know full well from a previous life that the Met (can’t speak for other police forces) in essence allows this because they shut down allegations by other officers/staff partly by making the victim the scapegoat and also not believing anything unless there is hardcore irrefutable evidence. You only have to look at their misconduct outcomes over the years, (which are available publicly), to see that a lot of officers/staff get away with no action because it can’t be “proved”
CaveMum · 30/09/2021 19:59

I agree that the police didn’t cover themselves in glory at the vigil, but that “poor woman” (Patsy Stevenson) was a professional protestor/activist. She’s part of a group (Sisters Uncut) that have form for infiltrating any kind of protest with an anti-police “ACAB” message.

That group don’t give a stuff about Sarah, or actual women’s rights. There was a thread about them in Feminism Chat at the time: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/4192410-Sisters-Uncut?pg=1

noodlezoodle · 30/09/2021 20:09

I am SO FUCKING ANGRY.

This thread has actually really helped, and I'm really grateful to the posters who pointed me towards the Centre for Women's Justice as supporting them feels like something practical I can do. Thanks also for highlighting Azir Nafzal, following him on twitter now.

Bienchen · 30/09/2021 20:17

This happens time and time again: French confession may end 35-year hunt for serial killer. ...a former military police officer is said to have confessed to being the man known as Le Grêlé - the pockmarked man - before he died. BBC link www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-58749596

Bienchen · 30/09/2021 20:19

Very grateful to hear about the Centre for Women's Justice, hope they will receive lots of support.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 30/09/2021 20:34

@EvilPea

I was talking to someone earlier who is fairly high up in the met. The general feeling there is of disgust. The man is hated by anyone they talk to and is considered the lowest of the low for dragging all police down with him.
I was in the Met 32 years ago. The Misogyny and Racism were palpable at that time, so I transferred back to my local police force. I'd have really loved to have thought that things had moved on since then, but they really haven't. I have two close friends who are married and still in the force. One on Murder Squad, one on Child Abuse. I honestly don't know how they do it. They have 2 boys. I speak to them often about how they manage to switch off. I've since left the force a long time ago. Having a daughter and working in such a sexist and mysoginistic environment just doesn't sit well. But I do get that the 'Good Cops' want to make a difference
Poetrypatty · 30/09/2021 20:35

Cressida Dick ought to resign and there needs to be a proper review about the whole culture of the Met. The handling of the vigil was so disgusting - the way the police steamed in doesn't tie in with what they're saying about how oh so horrified they were. They should have been standing side by side with women at the vigil not arresting them.