Come and play my made-up game

[UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa]

I will ask for advice, and you have to answer using only a quote from somewhere else on Mumsnet. Then you can ask for the next piece of advice. (best to quote the advice question you're answering in case there's cross-posting)

Okay, first question: What should I wear to my cousin's wedding?

What do you dislike about your home?

'a hole in the floor about a foot square'

What should I do with my leftover wine?

Looks like you could do with a handful of water snails

It's a little registry office/restaurant wedding at half term. What should I wear?

It's a little registry office/restaurant wedding at half term. What should I wear?

'a mangy old purple dressing with beanie baby cats sewn to it, backcombed hair, smeared make-up, pink fluffy cat slippers and fetching QVC pink nylon cat pyjamas and matching cat cameo brooch'

What's the best way to spend my day off tomorrow?

Best way to spend day off

Roast dinner
Tv
Sex

What's the best way to spend my day off tomorrow?

'Is it dogging? It’s dogging isn’t it?'

How can you tell whether someone is telling you the truth or not?

How can you tell whether someone is telling you the truth or not?

I really really hope everyone is telling fibs, because the thought you may all be telling the truth is just too awful to contemplate.

What career advice have you given your children?

Never under estimate the power of washing up liquid

Regardless of whether you are still married or not, what did you do with yours?

@FantasticButtocks, I laughed out loud at the dogging one. Your answers are as fantastic as your buttocks!

Regardless of whether you are still married or not, what did you do with yours?

'provided champagne, caviar and laser hair removal'

What can I do about my bad breath?

[quote UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa]@FantasticButtocks, I laughed out loud at the dogging one. Your answers are as fantastic as your buttocks![/quote]

Okay, how about: What can I do about my neighbour's bad breath?

What can I do about my neighbour's bad breath?

“laughing heartily at the thought of him lay like a dead beetle with a radiator on top of him”

Help, I fancy my DD’s teacher! What should I do?

Help, I fancy my DD’s teacher! What should I do?

'He can’t wank because you’re starting teacher training next week?'

What was the first full-on crush you ever had, and what did you do about it?

What was the first full-on crush you ever had, and what did you do about it?

'Can I propose Daddy Pig from Peppa Pig. Never fancied a cartoon pig before but that voice!'
+
'We’ve acted on it since, no regrets, very glad it happened but yea, obviously one for the grave for both of us!'

What quality do you admire most about your best friend?

What quality do you admire most about your best friend?

I am simultaneously fascinated and repulsed. Suspect she is delusional and a fabulist as well

What career advice have you given your children?

What quality do you admire most about your best friend?

I don't like it when she wears her jodhpurs to do the Waitrose shop but she throws an excellent garden party.

What career advice have you given your children?

What career advice have you given your children?

'I'm sure there is a lot of shredding going on. And I'm meaning important documents and papers/manuals/SOP books that are important to the running of the Country, not just incriminating documents.'

What is the one thing that someone could say to you to sweep you off your feet?

What is the one thing that someone could say to you to sweep you off your feet?

"The best things in life are free.... if you can out-run the store security"

How should dh and I spent our date night? The in-laws are babysitting and I want to make it special!

@35andThriving

What is the one thing that someone could say to you to sweep you off your feet?

"The best things in life are free.... if you can out-run the store security"

How should dh and I spent our date night? The in-laws are babysitting and I want to make it special!

Eating noodles with the elderly Korean lady in your garden.

How best can I get my DH to stop farting in bed, it's keeping me awake.

How best can I get my DH to stop farting in bed, it's keeping me awake.

'Get a tame lion?

Or failing that, some lion poo from the zoo. I kid you not!'

I spilled tomato sauce on the carpet. Help!

I spilled tomato sauce on the carpet. Help!

Teaspoon of smoked paprika does incredible things

I'm starting to think about Christmas. What should I buy MIL?

I'm starting to think about Christmas. What should I buy MIL?

'Could be a bike, helmet a few books and a toy.

Or 300 things from poundland.'

My hamster has been annoying me lately. Is there anything I can do?

My hamster has been annoying me lately. Is there anything I can do?

This has been annoying me for a year or so. It will die an unpleasant death, don’t worry.

What are you most looking forward to about Christmas?

What are you most looking forward to about Christmas?

'The actually going under bit is quite nice. You’re awake and then the next thing you know you wake up.'

What have you already done that has broken a New Year's resolution?

What have you already done that has broken a New Year's resolution?

I gave my dad eminems greatest hits cd. On my mums recommendation. Not quite sure why I did.

I need a new hobby, any ideas?