Serial killer name change

[weirdnamechange]

I really don't know what to do. I recently got married to a wonderful man and I have always wanted to take my partner's name (I am a feminist, it is a choice I want to make). Unfortunately my first name combined with his last name is the name of a very famous serial killer. Before we got married I said I would deal with that issue as it was important for us to have the same name (and I would like to be traditional and take his name), but now that it is time to change my name on bank cards etc I am getting cold feet. I can't wrap my head around introducing myself as this killer??!! My husband is upset as I am going back on our agreement..

What should I do? Could you change it knowing what that name means to most people?

I'm getting Gavin and Stacey vibes. Don't all their characters have serial killer names?

15:11Aquamarine1029

Why is your husband upset?

Don't worry, he won't be once she's stuffed him under the floor boards.

He could take the surname Rose

So she’d become Rose Rose

"@Ritasueandbobtoo9 Life is too short to be associated with a serial killer".

😂😂😂

I wouldn't be giving my children a name that wasn't mine.

You wanted to all share a name. Presumably he did, too. So share your name. Or at least double barrel it.

You really should not be feeling bad about this. You are well within your rights to change your mind. It's perfectly allowed. You can't go through life with a shameful name that makes people do a double-take or a smirk at you - imagine what that's going to do to you after a few years.

Either keep your name, double barrel it or he takes yours, or you come up with a new one. But going through life ashamed, embarrassed and reclusive because you're called Myra Hindley isn't an option.

Make a new name from your surname and his surname. You will both have the same name, it will not be the name of a serial killer.

He is unreasonable to expect you to change your name to a serial killer's!!!

Don't do it OP. I know someone unfortunate enough to share a name with a famous convicted pedophile and its an absolute blight on his life.

I felt so sorry for H from Steps when all the headlines were suddenly screaming about 'Paedophile singer/musician Ian Watkins'. I know most people just think of him as H, but that's the kind of thing that can blight your life forever.

I remember reading of a woman called Maxine Carr, who received death threats, hate mail and other abuse from hard-of-thinking people who assumed she was the infamous girlfriend of Ian Huntley - even though it had been widely reported that the criminal MC had been given a new identity, not to mention that this poor innocent woman was black.

I don't think I'd want to spend the rest of my life enduring the introduction doubletakes, tiresome conversation repeats etc.

Could he take your name? Or, can you double barrel your names splitting the two infamous ones?

My DIL still goes by her maiden name at work/bank etc but in other respects she also uses her married surname sometimes when it suits her.

Jo Brand is great so what's that about?!

I’m married but just kept my name. My husband doesn’t mind-I can’t see how your husband can be upset because you don’t want to be called Rose West.

I understand wanting to have the same last name so why doesn’t he take yours?
Or why not have a new name altogether.

Why can't he change his name?

Have a woman change her FIRST name because her husband is sulking? Her whole identity? WTAF?

Umm, No. WTAF?

The OP said SHE wanted to change her name. I have always wanted to take my partner's name.

The husband started sulking when she changed her mind.

If SHE still really wants to take it, the are options.

Maybe introduce yourself using a diminutive that won't be such an immediate association when you first meet people? Otherwise laugh it off - after all, it's your DH's fault that you 'became' a serial killer

@icedcoffees

Why can't he change his name?

He could. I know a man who has done this. His wife to be didn’t want Beever as her surname.

It could be Mary Bell too?

Nope, I couldn't do this.

Why don’t you both change your surnames to one you both like - a sort of new beginning to mark your marriage.

Otherwise can you use your middle name or a nickname? I use my own name rather than DH’s I have been married 25 years and I am no less committed to the marriage.

Well I don't think you should change your name to your husband's surname if you are not comfortable with what your name will be. It's very common for women not to change their surnames on marriage, whether they will have a serial killer name or not. Your husband will just have to get over it.

As an aside - my DS's driving instructor had the same name as a very notorious serial killer, (Obviously he was named before this killer became known) - he said he'd never had any problem's having that name - although my DS's friends all thought it was hilarious/weird when he told them his driving instructors name.

I think you just need to tell your husband that OBVIOUSLY you will not be changing your sur name.

Did you mean to type ''I am not a feminist'' because you also typed that you want to be traditional.

@SamVimes6

He could take the surname Rose

So she’d become Rose Rose

Middle name Thorn.

Not the same but I knew a Sara Payne the same time that little Sara died
And a Rosemary West
It happens , it’s just a name but it’s your name. Tell people who remark to piss off

If it's Mary Ann Cotton just drop the Ann bit.
But Rose West - big no.
Beverley Allitt isn't great either.
Very much doubt your first name is Myra but if it is and he's Hindley it's a big no.
Just tell him no, you don't want to have the same name as a serial killer and he can quit sulking!