I'll take your Chester draws and I'll raise you a...

[smellyjellycopter]

Wallah! It's the first time I've seen voilà written this way. But when I think about it, it seems like a really obvious thing to do so I wonder how common it is.
Is it a "thing" that I've just missed before now?

It was Stick Insects 🤣 Still makes me snort when I see it!

[quote PattyPan]@RedlightGreenlight What are bineshire blinds? I can't work it out![/quote]
Could it be "Venetian blinds"?

[quote PattyPan]@RedlightGreenlight What are bineshire blinds? I can't work it out![/quote]
Ii think it's meant to be venetian blinds.

It’s just getting the wrong end of the stick. I had a very intelligent ex who was adamant Enid Blyton was man. Sometimes you just get the wrong idea in your head about a something and never realise it’s incorrect

Damp squid. I've known people who believe it's "damp squid", maybe because it's a better visual image than the actual phrase. I'm sure a couple of weeks ago I heard a R4 presenter say "damp squid".

Talking of "Popcorn the kettle black," at my autism support group, one of the girls there mentioned that her brother (also ASD like us) once took the phrase literally - as is common. Their gran had said "pot calling the kettle black" and he had retorted with "well that would be a racist kettle, wouldn't it?"

His sister had to explain to him: "That's not what it means, mate."

I've seen an English person write 'ovwa'. Took me ages to try to work out what it meant, until I said it out loud to myself and realised (context also helped) that it was 'au revoir'.

I didn't mind that one, although I thought it was funny, because it's not a phonetic pronunication and there's no way you'd know how to spell it unless you'd seen it written correctly. However, what really winds me up is the overuse of the word 'myself' where the speaker just means 'me' or 'I'.

@Mamette

I love this one- reaper cushions 😂

I need new cushions for my 2 seater chair those reaper ones look perfect I nearly typed prefect 😂

I saw 'rest bite' today, thought that was pretty good.

@Crankley

There was a thread on here recently which wasn't going the OP's way and she ended a post with 'Chow!' (ciao).

She actually ended it with “Chow for now” 😂

Nothing wrong with expresso.
It's espresso.

You might appreciate this:

[quote PattyPan]@RedlightGreenlight What are bineshire blinds? I can't work it out![/quote]
It took me a while to work it out. You'd have to say 'Ben ee shir' to get close to Venetian.

@Toottootdrivers

Rest bite. It amazes me how many people use it!

That was the one I was coming to say.

I did once see someone asking if anyone had had any luck getting their GP to prescribe medical maddawana.

@EmergencyHydrangea

Imagine! There are people in the world who haven't been lucky enough to have the education of the snobby bitches on mumsnet! Let's point and laugh at them

Don't worry, we are.

@PeterOhanrahahanrahan

Damp squid. I've known people who believe it's "damp squid", maybe because it's a better visual image than the actual phrase. I'm sure a couple of weeks ago I heard a R4 presenter say "damp squid".

Even better again, I saw someone using “damn squid” which really made me laugh!

@Confusedandshaken

We had plans drawn up for a new house (it's very common to self build n Ireland, we aren't rich or looking to go on Grand Designs). They included an "On Sweet' bathroom.

Could have been worse. On sweat bathroom anyone?

Those poor, poor cuddly toys

@EmergencyHydrangea

Imagine! There are people in the world who haven't been lucky enough to have the education of the snobby bitches on mumsnet! Let's point and laugh at them

One of them is me laughing at myself, to be fair.

I’ll just have a slither of cake. Noooooo!!!

the snobby bitches on mumsnet!
Well that's the popcorn kettle black.

@roobicoobi

It is important that we keep our language clear and pure - grammar and spelling mistakes are abhorent.

*Abhorrent

😂

@OpalBerry

the snobby bitches on mumsnet! Well that's the popcorn kettle black.

😂😂

We say damp squid on purpose for jokes.

Oh and tender hooks instead of tenterhooks.