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Original poster

I knew my relationship was over when.........

866 replies

Itwasoverwhen · 22/05/2021 14:25

We went camping, there was a huge storm, he packed up his car and left me with 3 children, a huge tent to take down and everything still to pack in the lashing rain and wind because 'his stuff was packed'. I was still there an hour later and a man from a neighbouring tent couldn't even believe he had gone and just left me to struggle on my own.

Your turn...

OP posts:
Noshowlomo · 22/05/2021 16:52

After stringing me along for a year I come home to an email saying “well I said I’d let you know if something happened and it’s happened” coz he had shagged some girl we hadn’t long met (after him telling me he loved me, then he didn’t, wanted to live together, then let’s just be friends).
They got engaged, had a kid, split up and now she’s left the country.
Thank god, coz I met my DH two years later and he’s incredible. Never been one mind game or boy of bullshit out of his mouth.

BadgerHair · 22/05/2021 16:53

He cheated on me and lied and lied and lied.

Noshowlomo · 22/05/2021 16:53

*bit of bullshit

Longingforatikihut · 22/05/2021 16:57
  1. When they had the dog PTS for doing exactly what dogs do naturally.
  2. When they made a pass at a friend (I also found a kilo of coke in the cupboard when I moved out).
  3. When they slept with my best friend.
  4. When they went to slap me for staying late at work.

I know how to pick em. Now I stay single. A million times happier.

thefourgp · 22/05/2021 16:58

There were a few but crunch time came when my late father had a severe stroke and nearly died. I’d spend all day at hospital whilst my DH stuck our young children in front of the tv with only biscuits to eat while he watched sports and gambled on his phone in bed. I’d come home emotionally drained and would be expected to cook everyone dinner, do all the housework and interact with the children because they’d had no attention all day. I realised I was completely on my own in that marriage and had zero support of any kind from him. There’s no way I was going going to let my young sons grow up thinking that was an acceptable way to treat your wife and kids.

IEat · 22/05/2021 17:02

2 different men said I’m going away for a few days to find myself
1st one hurt like hell 3 years dumped by a letter saying how he wanted to be on his own, 3 months later he’d married his ex and they were having a kid., when the 2nd man did it I knew it’s over was coming.

Definitely glad they ended.. 3 years with the 1st and I never met any of his family or friends! The 2nd liked anal, not my thing tbh
Good luck to them. The hurt that they don’t want you passes and we move on. Be happy

Onetraumaatatimeplease · 22/05/2021 17:03

When he told me the world would be a better place without me on it, and helpfully suggested suicide as an option for me, in front of our then 12 year old DS. 5 years on, and out of our 4 children he only sees one, and that's not going to last, the other three can't stand the drunken bastard.

QueeniesCroft · 22/05/2021 17:04

After a year of intense lovebombing followed by constant comments about my weight, comparisons with other women, lies about where he was, him asking if I would ask my best friend to have sex with him, and a few episodes when he was physically hurtful, it was as simple as not being arsed to get a bus.

He was being posted to Belize for 6 months and the night before I was staying with my friend (who hated him, I didn't need to ask if she would shag him because she would have rather died!). He expected me to go to the airport to see him off and wave my tear-stained hanky or whatever. I remembered that he was leaving about 20 minutes before the only bus that day was due, but decided that playing with my friend's daughter was more fun. I never saw him again.

LadyLindaT · 22/05/2021 17:04

Coming in from a "Xmas do" at 5 am when I was 9 months pregnant, and snarling at me, "What are you doing up?"

Jalapinot · 22/05/2021 17:07

Had an argument in the car over something relatively minor (or so I thought). Was on the way home from visiting his family 300 miles away and it was about 9pm on a Sunday. Asked to stop at some services because I was desperate for the loo. He refused to stop at the first ones I asked at and eventually stopped at the second after I begged. I got out and he drove off and left me there with my handbag in his car.

Notcrackersyet · 22/05/2021 17:08

Some of you guys have been through hell. I hope you are all living happier times now. Me ... A long time ago I was at a family wedding and at the end the vicar was wrapping up and he said that he heard that the next time the family would be getting together would be for the wedding of notcrackers and fiancé. My blood ran cold and I was filled with a massive feeling of dread. We’d been drifting for a while and I knew with certainty in that moment I wanted out. I ended it a month later.

newtb · 22/05/2021 17:08

My 'D'H screamed at me that I'd forced him to get married in the ' fucking Church of England'.

Still took me a year to leave.

After 40 years

IEat · 22/05/2021 17:13

I was 17 and fickle and a boyfriend and I went McDonald’s and as he ate his food I saw how dirty his fingernails were.. couple that with a coat he wore with gold lining it was all too much

Boyfriend after that one wore a jumper my dad had (blue with a diamond pattern) we went to a party with my friends and I was embarrassed.. shame really he had a massive willy and his aunt who he lived with hated me . Gosh he was pretty and I was such a cow

Miasicarisatia · 22/05/2021 17:15

he stood in front of the car so I ran him over

cookiecreampie · 22/05/2021 17:20

He constantly accused me of our baby not being his even though he knew full well she was. He just wanted to argue with me. Had me in tears sending me horrible texts while I was in labour. Then didn't contact me afterwards and come to see his child. We had an older child together who he hasn't seen since and hasn't ever seen the baby I was pregnant with. He's still obsessed with me and gets in touch maybe once a year to send me dirty messages or give me grief over things that happened 7 years ago, despite the fact I'm now married to someone else and have had more children.

PennineWayinSlingbacks · 22/05/2021 17:22

My then DH was working from home a few days after our DD was born 11 weeks earlier and I had been discharged after a very difficult section under general anaethestic with other complications, so wasn't allowed to drive.
The hospital was a 5 min drive but rather than get up from his desk and drop me up to the special care unit, he made me walk into town and get the bus because he couldn't possibly leave his post during the working day. Actually, I knew his CEO who was a lovely man and would have been outraged at this.
I look back and feel angry at myself for allowing it but something really died that day and it was the beginning of the end.

Exofanaddict · 22/05/2021 17:22

When I was informed not by him but by his ex that he'd started using again after rehab Hmm

PennineWayinSlingbacks · 22/05/2021 17:23

he stood in front of the car so I ran him over
Fair enough.

Nuggetnugget · 22/05/2021 17:24

After 7 years together and hoping for marriage and children - his sister had a child and he often said 'that child gets all the attention in our house'
Yep. He was still living at home and obviously clicked with me it was never going to work. Now have a lovely husband and two beautiful kids.

Clawdy · 22/05/2021 17:25

When I realised that, nice as he was, it would be such a huge relief if he told me it was over.

RaraRachael · 22/05/2021 17:27

I realised we had nothing in common but the grown up kids and I was being taken for granted - working full time, doing all the cooking and cleaning etc while he worked, came home, ate dinner, slept in his chair till bedtime

dizzycatdance2 · 22/05/2021 17:29

I was 10w with a difficult pg and my light spotting had turned to full on flood. I rang exh in floods of tears , I was due to give two 3 hour back to back lectures.l was paid by the hour.

His response to my incoherent sobs "well you have to go to work" , which, sadly , I did. Nearly crashed the car on the way I was in such a state.

lostsoul1989 · 22/05/2021 17:29

I've just went over and asked what was going on, all I got was "nothing just tired" then ignored me.

Purplewithred · 22/05/2021 17:29

I'd been miserable for years. And one day, the tiniest little feather of a nothing floated down on the scales and I went from 50.00001% stay to 49.99999% stay, and I told him it was over.

Moondust001 · 22/05/2021 17:30

The friend he was out playing chess at his house with, phoned to ask if he wanted to come around and play chess.... (before the days of mobiles)