Trapped toddler parents:"Where else can you post tuff tray pictures and moan about your husband?"

[PinkDaydreams]

Following on from the previous thread. Thanks @footprintsintheslow for the thread title inspiration 😁

@MonkeyPuddle, all 3 year olds swear don't they? My DS1 actually said how do you spell fucking hell?. Bonus points for trying to spell. Minus points for trying to spell that.

@Motherofmonsters. Don't worry, no wonder after getting up so early, you only have so much patience in reserve. Hope you have a better night tonight.

@brokengate, welcome to the group. Get the kids to bed, leave the shopping in the bags and open your wine 🍷. Good luck for your job interview tomorrow.

@brokengate Jesus woman how have you coped this long?! Good luck on the interview!!

I’m off for my mum date with random internet strangers. Ugh.

Had a terrible night with DD last night. Wouldn’t sleep in the cot or in my bed. We are starting sleep training tonight as my mental health can’t take it any more.

@Chocolatetrifle

I vote for the bin *@PinkDaydreams*, the green garden waste one if feeling in the mood, the black normal one if in a bad mood. I'm so bad at recycling anything at the moment too, I have 2 blue bins as we have that much to recycle but half the time I'm too tired to wash things out so they go in the black bin too. God I sound so boring!

No, you sound lazy

@listershologram, I'm not actually, but thank you for your comment. Have a lovely day.

I've just got back from a toddler group with DD, it was very surreal. I forgot what it's like to be in a small room full of toddlers. The other surreal thing was I could actually just sit and let her play, DS was a whirlwind at these group so I could never sit with the mums as I had to be next to him at all times. It was definitely a novelty. DD really enjoyed herself as well so I've asked if there is any spaces on the next lot.

Hope you're playdate goes well @monkeypuddle

I think you might be on the wrong thread Listershologram

@Chocolatetrifle if you’re lazy then so am I! Ignore the arseholes.

@Motherofmonsters that sounds lovely! I’m glad you both had a nice time, I think we all deserve it don’t we! I love watching them play.

Went on my mum date, was actually really nice. We had coffee in the sunshine. Plus other adults to talk to. We all have children 0-6m and one has an older child the same age as DS. we’ve arranged for coffee again next week and me and this particular woman are going to play date our 3 year olds. Pleased I went.

I've started going to a socially distanced playgroup, about a 15 minute drive away.
Apparently, one woman drives for an hour, from the other side of the city, just to get out of the house! I can totally relate to this!

Right ladies. I need your help sorting our sleep issues! Things are really tough at the moment and I'm a bit worried about my mental health. Making this sleep situation easier would help enormously.

Currently DD 6 months:

• all naps are in the sling (guaranteed), or the pram/car seat (works most of the time not all)
• at night feeds or is cuddled to sleep
• has a bedtime routine
• wakes when I leave
• wakes frequently
• no concrete nap routine yet as they are so different in length but basically try to get her to sleep 90 mins/ 2 hrs after she last woke

My biggest issue is that she is getting disturbed so much. Trying to keep her asleep in the sling whilst toddler is around is so hard. Her room is being decorated and will be done next week.

How can I start getting her to nap in the cot? Should i be doing nighttime too? Help!

@OhToBeASeahorse are you me?!?
What you’ve described there is similar to DD, apart from nap length, she won’t go longer than 40 minutes.
We’re trying sleep training from tonight, gradual withdrawal method we’re going with. Fully expect a shit week.

Glad your mum date was a success @monkeypuddle.

I don't have any advice only solidarity @ohtobeaseahorse, sleep and children is such a nightmare.

@OhToBeASeahorse we’ve decided to give this way a go. Have fed DD, normally pat her back in my arms til she’s asleep, but just sat here and she dropped off. Now to transfer her to bed....!

We’ve got a trip to a local farm booked tomorrow afternoon, can’t wait, an actual Day Out with the family.

Shit, forgot the link.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.motherandbaby.co.uk/amp/first-year/baby/sleep/get-a-full-night-s-sleep-in-just-10-days

Hi everyone, I'm so glad you enjoyed the toddler class @Motherofmonsters and your mum meet up was a success too @MonkeyPuddle. It's things like that that give you a nice boost and really help you get through the day I think.

We've had a nice day and both little ones have behaved! We went to a local farm and saw the animals and got some eggs. Might do some baking tomorrow with them and make rock cakes, to be fair most of my baking turns out like rock cakes. We have also been in the garden lots and sorting through old toys. We've also had the sticker books and fuzzy felt out for a change.

@OhToBeASeahorse, I have no advice either as I have never done sleep training. I have never had either DS self-settle. I feed and cuddle to sleep still then transfer to cot. I even still cuddle to sleep DS1 but at least he's in bed! I co-sleep with both at least some part of the night. But we are here for support for you. Perhaps try one thing at once so you don't feel like you are changing so much at once. Perhaps wait until her room is sorted then spend some time in it each day so she gets used to it before trying a bedtime settle.

Good luck tonight Monkey Puddle and Ohtobeaseahorse.

Hope everyone gets some sleep.

Thanks @Chocolatetrifle that's kind

@MonkeyPuddle we did gradual retreat with our toddler when he was 8 months and it changed our lives no exaggeration. But - are u night weaning too?

Also, I realised last night that I most likely have PND. I'm terrified

@chocolatetrifle don't worry about the recycling - turns out we were recycling "wrong" for ages. We were dutifully washing out yoghurt pots and margerine tubs and fruit tubs - turns out the council don't take "low grade plastics" so now we only recycle plastic bottles (like squash or milk bottles).

@OhToBeASeahorse

Sorry, got cut off - try not to be too terrified, so many times I have read on here women looking back on their PND, and saying how much they started feeling better once they saw their Drs/started taking medication - in a few months that will be you. xx

@OhToBeASeahorse no not night weaning yet, my boobs would explode I think. I’m not really sure what we’re doing to be honest.
DD slept for a max of 20 mins in her cot, but resettled in half a nanosecond when we picked her up so DP and I are somewhat tired today! DD is full of beans, she’s currently laid next to me on the bed kicking seven bells out of my left tit.

Talk to us about feeling PND-y. I had it after DS was born. This is a safe space to talk x

Morning, sunny day here. Just means sun cream tantrums now on to do list. Gah.

Interview went ok, I didn't cry. I won't get it but didn't humiliate myself. Good personal challenge.

I had PND in anxiety form after first Dd. Still fell it some days. Others are right that talking really, really helps. I also strongly believe that sleep deprivation makes it way worse. Or sleep makes everything better.
Baby here is four months and I'm desperate to reach magic six months go to your room. Every time I move she wakes up. Toddler spends all day waking her. Just a constant battle. Then she moans and cries all day because she's tired poor soul. I've had some nap success leaving her outside patio kitchen doors this week. I can see her but much quieter.

Totally agree that sleep is key, it's all a vicious circle. I think I had undiagnosed PND after DS1 was born. A failed induction led to an emcs and DS1 had jaundice and was under the special bilirubin light for 2 days and nights and in total I was in hospital for 6 nights and I don't think I slept for any of it. I was hallucinating I'm sure with the lack of sleep and dressed at 5am on my last morning in demanding to be discharged. I had flashbacks for months.

My birth experience was better with DS2 as I had a planned caesarean. However now it's still the night time get ups coupled with naughty 3 year old behaviour that's hard work. Plus the anxiety has now just doubled!

@OhToBeASeahorse, I'm sure PND is much more common than people think and it manifests in different forms. You are definitely not alone. We are here to listen.

@OhToBeASeahorse so sorry you're struggling. You aren't alone even though I know it can feel like it sometimes!

I had very bad depression and anxiety before kids, luckily it has got much better over the last few years but I'm still very aware of it and terrified of it cropping up again. Was due to go out this afternoon with friends but have ended up a sobbing mess on the sofa instead. But that's okay. I'm aware of my limits and know now it's okay to have bad days and when to ask for help. Sending to everyone who struggles with their mental health!

Sleep wise we aren't doing too badly here, DS is up every two and a half hours at night which so far is manageable. DD was far worse when she was a baby so feel like we have a dream child at the moment!

So sorry to hear about the sleepless nights, pnd and general irritability of youngsters.
I’m going through a biting, pinching and kicking stage with my autistic 3 year old, he does it when he’s excited.

Sunny day here, went to the playground and for a walk along the prom which was nice. Paddling pool later on (although this only lasted fifteen minutes and he got fed up) some sand play with pine cones and now a bit of iPad whilst I tidy up then it’s bath and bed at 7.30.....then take away time for us grown ups!!