Worst Mother's Day gift ever :(

[Molly1989]

So after being up every hour with DS last night including being peed on at 3am, and just having had my first shower in four days, DH presents me with my Mother's Day gift. A toilet roll holder. I want to cry. He said I didn't tell him what I wanted, but I did repeatedly, and even if I hadn't, a toilet roll holder? Meh. Anyone else care to join me in solidarity?

I think my internet may be slow as just seen the comment re you making him breakfast- this is going to sound harsh but you are a fool. You are allowing him to treat you like crap and he is utilising it. Either grow up and behave how you’d like to be treated or stop moaning. You are currently setting a very poor example to your child and this will be replicated down the line.
My sympathy has waned massively as you are signalling to those around you this is acceptable behaviour.

I said last night I wanted a lie in - just to make expectations clear - and was moaned at for that. Because apparently I went the wrong way about it. So my lie in has been ruined by moaning and sighing.
Sorry about the toilet roll holder though, that really is appalling.

My worst was when when the dds (13&11). Nothing organised from school or DH so I got a grip, didn't sulk.
We all took the dog out and an old man wished me happy Mother's Day, DH laughed, the girls were embarrassed. I felt so sad.

This year got a homemade card & flowers from my now 15&13 year old. Still have DH for now.

Couldn't get upset myself about the gift.

But I've never been one who thinks material items are any indicator of how someone's cares.

The important question is why haven't you showered in 4 days and why have you cooked everyone breakfast?

If you don't hand him the baby and say "watch dc whilst I shower" then you are complicit in this. If you don't value you then your showing everyone you don't feel they need to value you.

You don't need a gift for Mother's Day. Everyday should be mother's day in that you are valued.

sandgrown I love that story. I bet his mother was really pleased with it. Bless his little heart. It reminds me of when I was a child and found a discarded bunch of dead flowers in the street and took them home for my mum. My mum acted as if I had bought her something wonderful.

@itsgettingwierd

Couldn't get upset myself about the gift.

But I've never been one who thinks material items are any indicator of how someone's cares.

The important question is why haven't you showered in 4 days and why have you cooked everyone breakfast?

If you don't hand him the baby and say "watch dc whilst I shower" then you are complicit in this. If you don't value you then your showing everyone you don't feel they need to value you.

You don't need a gift for Mother's Day. Everyday should be mother's day in that you are valued.

Ffs! Here’s another one. 🙄🙄🙄

Would you like a medal? Or is that too materialistic for you?

Is there a context?

It's not just a terrible present, it's just .. weird? Why a holder?

I agree, the loo brush is a perfect matching present.

Throw it at him!

My husband seriously asked me if I wanted a new kitchen sink for my birthday last year. I told him to fuck off.

No, he isn’t just a bit crap. He doesn’t care about you.
Why do you care so little about yourself that allows you to be treated like this?

A thoughtless and shitty gift.

I’d rather have a card with nice words in it than a crap gift.

One Mothers Day, My dh once bought me a crappy box of chocolates that I didn’t like, being petty I kept them and gave him them back for Father’s Day. I’ve had lovely thoughtful gifts since then😂😂😂😂

I got a nice planted basket delivered yesterday.
First Mother's Day thing/card since they were in infants and made them in class.
They are 18 and 21.

for you.

Why are the women on here who are telling their Mother’s Day stories about how they are doing the lions share of everything/been up all night while partner sleeps in other room/naps/refuses to help etc not putting their foot down? It’s 2021. You are in a partnership. You need to sit down with your other half and explain that this is unfair and not acceptable. Accepting this behaviour will not change it. You will be setting a precedent for the future by ignoring it now and nothing will change. I would explain, very clearly what you expect to happen. Men are sometimes not great at picking up clues or being ‘empathetic’ so spell it out.

📣 WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THINGS FOR YOUR CRAP HUSBANDS? 📣

It’s very difficult to muster any sympathy for someone who is complicit in their own complaints.

Tell him, this is a crap gift and I’m very upset. You can look after the kids while I take a long bath. And I will expect a cup of coffee’.

If he whinges about that, tough shit.

He bought your house a present!

Say the house says "thank you " and ask for a bottle of gin....or some such.

I’m surprised how many martyrs there are in the world. The first Mother’s Day is particularly special and yes we know you’re not his mother but you are the person who bore him his child. This should be a day of indulgence and care and love - in whatever form would be special to you.

And theres me about to have a come to jesus talk with my husband who got me nothing and hasnt even said happy first mothers day. Who am i to be surprised he didnt say happy birthday four days ago.

That is a shit present

That's really rubbish OP, is this your first Mother's Day? Today is my tenth. I have learned my lesson after several years of waking up to nothing at all. I have a lovely bottle of gin and body shop gift set I have bought for myself. I also have M&S food that just needs to be shoved in the oven later. Happy Mother's Day OP

He is a bit crap generally, hence lack of showers. He's just gone to have his shower after I cooked everyone breakfast. Anyway.

OP, you have just rewarded him for the shitty present, so why do you expect anything better in the future? These men do this because they are wankers in the first place. They carry on doing it because they are "rewarded" through female compliance.

That's awful. I'd wrap it back up and give it to him for Father's Day.

So many women putting up with crap behaviour. It’s so frustrating for the rest of us who put our foot down

@Alcemeg 🤣🤣🤣

@Molly1989 did he buy anything for his mum? I agree with PP. Toilet brush for Father’s Day and toilet roll for his birthday. And not the 3ply quilted stuff.

He is a bit crap generally, hence lack of showers. He's just gone to have his shower after I cooked everyone breakfast. Anyway

He is not "a bit" crap. He is very, VERY crap. He is crap on a stick. Selfish, uncaring and disrespectful. And you cooked his breakfast after that. Blimey. I suppose he must have seemed nicer before you married him or got pregnant? Or maybe the men in your family are all crap and this is your normal? There are families where "selfish men, martyr women" is the pattern and if that's how you were brought up it can be easy to fall into that pattern and difficult to break out.

You've also just cooked breakfast for everyone???? Why are you putting up with this?!
Have some from me

@Molly1989 “He is a bit crap generally, hence lack of showers. He's just gone to have his shower after I cooked everyone breakfast. Anyway.”

Why did you make him breakfast?? You sound like a doormat.