If you were 44 and found out you were pregnant?

[HillsHaveEyez]

Would you have it?

I’m not asking for advice for myself. Just interested in whether you personally would go ahead with a surprise pregnancy at such an advanced age.

@LynnShelley

The minute we realised we didn't want a surprise pregnancy 'we' (well, one of us!) hightailed it to the hospital to make absolutely certain it didn't happen. Apart from complete abstinence it's the only answer to an unwanted pregnancy I can think of. Perhaps that's not the answer for everyone, but it stops all the worrying for good!

Well, exactly. If you know you don’t want to deal with an unwanted surprise, you can easily ensure you don’t have one.

There's no way I could have an abortion so yes, I'd have the baby

I had my first baby at 47. I had a very easy pregnancy although I opted to have an elected Caesar as I thought it safer. It was tiring but easier as I was working part time by then and my husband had retired so we were both with our son a great deal. We also were better off financially which made life easier, for instance hiring a cleaner. I made lots of friends amongst other mothers and I don’t think my being older made any difference to how they saw me. People tend to look younger for longer now anyway. I think being an older mother has more advantages than being a very young mother where often you’re not as stable emotionally and probably financially.

@Freud2 oh wow lucky lucky you ! I am 47 and have had zero luck conceiving in the last year! So nice to see a success story ! X

Congratulations Freud2, you are a very lucky woman x

At 44 any pregnancy would most likely have ended in a miscarriage due to the medication I take, which is also used in some cases to end pregnancy it's methotrexate. If by some miracle the pregnancy managed to survive there were be a very high likelyhood of birth defects. These were the reasons I elected to have a mirena at the age of 41 to avoid such a situation which would have been total head fuck for me. In good health I would have welcomed a baby at 44.

It happened to me. 44, thought I was menopausal, turned out I was pregnant. DS is 3yo now and I almost forget what life was like before he came.

I really want to have another kid ,but I am reaching 40 .I had my first at 32 .then life took on .I have health issues but this post gave me some hope .

No!

@gg12346 Good luck I had my first at 26 and now I'm 40 with a 13 yo, a 10 yo and an eight-month old baby girl!

I’m 42 (.5) with a 1 year old and a 3 year old

I wouldn't continue with the pregnancy.
Health issues and anxiety make me pretty sure I couldn't cope.

I couldn't abort but I would be extremely worried and anxious and would have to have every test available to know as much and prepare as much as possible for what I feel would be a reasonable risk of something not be right. But the biggest worry would be miscarriage or stillbirth tbh and the risks to my own health. I would also worry about the impact on my current family even though my youngest is only 5.
I have thought about a planned 3rd for at least a couple of years now but haven't been able to go ahead and try to make it happen due to various worries.
Older mothers aren't unheard of where I am but most seem to finish childbearing by / at 40. I only know a handful who have been older and mostly due to meeting partners late and it being a 1st or 2nd baby.
For a 1st or 2nd baby at this age I would feel differently, which is maybe odd, but I feel a 3rd is pushing the boundaries a bit. Unplanned I would proceed but with a sense of dread.