The latest corporate bullshit term I've noticed starting to increase

[StealthPolarBear]

A year ago people used to want meeting 'minutes' or 'notes' .
As of about six months ago I started to hear the term 'meeting read out' and it's on the increase.

Oh, and 'up' randomly added to verbs.

Eg to change up a layout, to search up a person.

Similarly, 'double down'. I don't really even know what it means but gather it's to commit to something in an energetic way

Presser is absolutely standard journo hack-speak
@friskybivalves

Well I have been a journalist for 25 years and never heard it until recently. Not on a national newspaper or TV though. Maybe it is limited to that world.

My kids have been using ‘search up’ since a young teacher taught them that’s the way to describe searching for something on the internet. Not sure it’s corporate, might be a societal slang change.

Ah I also hate deep dive particularly cos for me it would be a request for one which meant "I'm a muppet and don't understand this can you spend ages explaining it to me"
I also hate "top of mind" "what's top of mind for q1?" Fuck off you wankers!!

My kids say "let's search it up" - little annoying mini Americans they are!

@FenEel

Presser is absolutely standard journo hack-speak *@friskybivalves*

Well I have been a journalist for 25 years and never heard it until recently. Not on a national newspaper or TV though. Maybe it is limited to that world.

Perhaps it has come into use now that nobody would dare say 'gentlemen of the press' or 'pressmen' any more.

@peak2021 exactly, who knows what people might associate with a certain colour or date? I would not dream in a million years of telling people to wear a certain colour top to toe nail to cheer them up, 'wear your favourite colour' I could just about stomach (but it would still annoy me).

Dread to think how much management is paid to sit and think of this garbage.

Love the idea of CS bingo next week.

I just would not be able to reply to an email that mentioned socialising. Unless it was to do with the Xmas party.

I spend my life on a crusade against jargon. The new Cab Sec dislikes it so that is hopeful. Perhaps a new attitude will come down through the hierarchy. Or 'cascade'.

why is 'deck' a word that works there?

I think of the stack of slides like a deck of cards, rather than a yacht.

all hands meeting

That is more nautical, from 'all hands on deck'

@FenEel

I’ve also been a journo for 25 years and it’s been absolutely standard everywhere I’ve worked. But I’ve been in US media. I wonder if it’s something American that has only recently crossed the Atlantic.

Deep dive!

Absolutely hate that one although it does also Bring much mirth

@Thimbleberries

Not heard that one yet either.

But 'meeting' appears to be on its way out in some circles. Now it's a 'meet'. (And this was before Google meets started to be a thing). We have residents' meets, etc. in my flats. Run by a young, very try hard housing assistant who does absolutely nothing useful. Always sounds wrong to me.

I'm sticking with the perfectly good "moot" for this!

Someone who's recently started where I work keeps using 'hook up'.

Ooh all hands on deck makes more sense.
We recently had a slide sodding deck on coping with mental health problems which was mostly those twee cartoons (winnie the pooh style). It did nothing for my blood pressure.

We're all grown adults. Use words.

I have a new colleague who is trying to introduce calling regular meetings “ceremonies”. I was already less than keen on him. This tipped me over into active dislike.

@Doobigetta

That reminds me of the Handmaid's Tale.

He sounds like a dick.

‘Hearts and arrows’ - a review meeting

Please challenge these stupidities.

@Doobigetta 'Ceremonies' is an easy one to challenge in these Covid 19 times, because many cannot take place with the usual gathering of family and friends- weddings and funerals have limited numbers.

@coronafiona

"Daily stand up" - quick catch up with everyone "Working lean" - being efficient

Absolute bollocks

"Daily stand up" is from manufacturing. The start of the shift meeting where the production manager goes through what the team leaders need to know for their coming shift based on the previous shifts. It is literally a stand up meeting, usually in front of a KPI white board and should last no more than 10-15mins.

And "working lean" is also from manufacturing. Working efficiently is part of it, and it is often misused as just being that. But it's actually a whole process approach to manufacturing based on Toyota's manufacturing principles from the 1930s. The book is basically the Bible to many manufacturing engineers.

On boarding makes me want to scratch my eyes out. I refuse to say it If I am given it on a slide.

Also a humdinger from last week. "I just want to socialise this idea to see if it raises any antibodies" I responded with "fuck off Dave"

@Jaypreen

PhilCornwall1. It should have read "Prick".

That comes next time. Though he hasn't mentioned the picture, he did try to give me a hard time on yesterday's "stand up", so at some point this week, it could be changed and sent to him.

Although my DH is a BA in the project world, we're both currently wfh obvs and share an office - listening to his endless calls I've never heard so much wanky jargon in all my life! I'm in an Ops team in the public sector and based on that have decided that project roles are absolutely not for me!

@Tazers and @peak2021 I was not reticent in making it clear that we aren’t doing ceremonies. I think he might have picked up that I think he’s a tosser. I’m not very subtle.