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Original poster

DD12 wants to spend £92 on Robux

204 replies

IndieTara · 05/01/2021 19:43

She had £220 of Christmas money ( mostly from her dad who claimed not to know what to buy her )
A few days ago she gave me £80 cash and asked me to transfer the equivalent into her bank account as she wanted to shop on Amazon.
So I did.
She bought a hat and spent £50 on a Robux e gift card and had some change.
20 mins later she went Into her bedroom And I realised I could here something. Turns out she'd been scammed of the Robux on Adopt Me and was crying her heart out. This is not the first time she's been scammed on there and we have had many conversations on the subject.

Tonight she has asked me to transfer money into her Go Henry account again. When I asked why she told me she wants to spend £92 on Robux.

Now obviously it is her money but I can't help thinking that it's a complete waste of money too. I really want to say no but also know that she should be allowed to spend her own money on whatever she wants. We both also know that if she asked her dad to do the same he would flat out refuse.
What should I do?

OP posts:
Bluesmartiesandpandapop · 05/01/2021 22:21

I think it's our job as parents to guide their spending, especially with larger amounts. I would never let my child spend that on a game. We have conversations about money, and I always advise them to sleep on it before making a big purchase (over about £5 in my house). This is something I try to do myself, too. Those conversations and financial boundaries and parental guidance, combined with our lived experiences, become our relationships with money. It's not about taking their freedom away, it's about giving them the opportunity to make their own choices without being duped/ tricked/ scammed/ manipulated.

tomnjerrylover · 05/01/2021 22:22

@BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze
Actually I am a gamer. I game with my youngest- we've played a lot of amongUs this holiday.
She plays minecraft and roblox but she doesn't spend real money on it. You can play these games and still have fun
No in app purchases allowed in this house.
It is addictive and it isn't healthy for undeveloped brains to get a 'hit' from spend money.

As the saying goes fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.

She got scammed once - it should never have happened again especially twice in a year.

You keep repeating 'it's her money'
But completely ignoring posters saying that she lost £50 recently and a still wants to put more money into it - that is a problem.
That is not a healthy view of the game. She hasn't learnt to worry about loosing it, she can't see the value.

Cherrysoup · 05/01/2021 22:24

Rather obviously, I’d say no. No more online purchases without your supervision.

Dawnlassie · 05/01/2021 22:27

if she ends up in debt as an adult it won't be because of me and it won't be because she once spent £50 on Robux at age 12

Thats a worrying comment.

Original poster
IndieTara · 05/01/2021 22:29

@BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze I think I now realise that..
Honestly you'd think this was AIBU not Chat.
I'd better tell DD to prepare for a life as a debt ridden gambler thrust upon her by her feckless irresponsible mother.
Or maybe it's because she's so immature she must have SEN, as suggested by one particularly lovely poster.

OP posts:
Iggly · 05/01/2021 22:34

My dcs like to spend money on in game purchases. Luckily one of the games is much more secure than roblox.
Dd, who plays roblox and buys robux will happily spend a small fortune on it if I let her. Which I don’t. She did receive £30 worth of vouchers for the game so I couldn’t stop that. I instead let her subscribe for a monthly amount using her pocket money and she can use that instead.
Because of lockdown, there have been fewer opportunities to go to the shops and buy things - which was a better way of learning the value of money.

Personally I hate in game purchases but I do spend money on virtual things so who am I to judge? It’s just about keeping it affordable.

Original poster
IndieTara · 05/01/2021 22:34

@Dawnlassie that response was to the poster who said

'My friend had a mum like you and she is now up to her eyes in debt. Her kids have to go without because of how skint they are but if they get Christmas or birthday money they are also allowed to spend it on this shit. It’s a never ending cycle of poor money management'

OP posts:
maddy68 · 05/01/2021 22:39

It's her money. Let her spend it

Norwayreally · 05/01/2021 22:40

Say no. I won’t let my DC spend their money on fake money, I’ve had the conversation with them many times. They think I’m unfair but there’s just no way I’d spend real money on fake money. It’s absolutely ludicrous.

stevalnamechanger · 05/01/2021 22:41

You're the parent .

Teach your child the value of money. The mentality of some to save, some to spend and some to donate or invest.

Sorry but this is hugely irresponsible .

Allispretty · 05/01/2021 22:47

My ds got £150 for Xmas he already spent £40 on his x box and asked to spend £50 on fortnite (pre lockdown) I said no as we could go to smyths and see if he wanted to buy anything. To be honest now if he wants to he can spent it all on his x box as there's no toy shops open.

£92 is a lot but the way I would play it is she can use that but then the rest is put away for a while or no more money is spent online and she can physically spend it when out of lockdown

Aurelia1313 · 05/01/2021 22:47

I agree she needs to learn about money but let her spend it on crap and when she realises she has wasted her Christmas money that's a great lesson!
Having money is about learning how to deal with the consequences of what you do with it, she'll learn better by doing it herself than just by being told.

Allispretty · 05/01/2021 22:49

Also some of these responses are ridiculous it's a child for goodness sake! Of course we need to learn responsibility of money as we grow but I bet all you mnetters don't go donating your effing birthday money/Xmas money to bloody charity! It's a gift to buy yourself something for goodness sake!

This is the world we live In now...as sad as some people may find it children are more and more online, v bucks. Robux, minecraft etc is their equivalent of a toys r us haul or voucher

Allispretty · 05/01/2021 22:51

[quote IndieTara]@BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze I think I now realise that..
Honestly you'd think this was AIBU not Chat.
I'd better tell DD to prepare for a life as a debt ridden gambler thrust upon her by her feckless irresponsible mother.
Or maybe it's because she's so immature she must have SEN, as suggested by one particularly lovely poster.
[/quote]
It's ridiculous op let her spend her "gift" on something she wants! She's not been saving up pocket money for 5 years and about to blow it that would be a different story!

MsAdoraBelleDearheartVonLipwig · 05/01/2021 22:52

Roblox itself is a massive con. My dd14 has had pocket money put towards the game. Some random friend of her made a spurious complaint about her username which was upheld by the people at Roblox and her account was banned. I think the idea was that she’d simply start again with more money. I was furious, she was very upset. We both emailed and explained but they weren’t having it. We got generic responses even after appeal. She’s lost a few quid but learned a valuable lesson. These games are out to con you. We are not giving them any more of our money.

MegBusset · 05/01/2021 22:53

DS2 (11) likes to play Roblox / Fortnite etc and is allowed to buy in-game currency with his own money, but with a £5/month limit.

If he wants a bigger purchase then he can spend up to £20 but then would have to wait four months before he could buy something else.

At Christmas I am a little more relaxed and he spent £25 of Christmas money across various games.

This approach is on the understanding that he is sensible and mature about it and doesn't mither for more when his 'budget' is gone.

So OP I would have a conversation with your DD and ask her what she thinks is a reasonable agreement. For example every amount she spends on Robux the same amount goes in a long term savings account.

Jakey056 · 05/01/2021 22:54

Id be more concerned that you cannot see that long term this is bad for her. She is 12....
I cannot help but think this does nothing to help her appreciate the value of money, just piss it away online?
What about gambling, would you be happy if she were betting on a horse and lost it? Same thing really. Poor parenting when she needs better.

MegBusset · 05/01/2021 22:57

BTW for those who say it's a waste. At that age all my pocket money went on sweets, Smash Hits / Look In, Panini stickers and down the local Chinese... Hardly worthy long-term investments! I think on this thread (and in general) there is a value judgement on gaming = bad as it's not how we spent our youth.

Ithinkim · 05/01/2021 22:58

How has she been scammed? If it's happened before didn't you go over it all and warn her?

I think she's too young to be spending that much if she's unaware of the scammers.

Allispretty · 05/01/2021 22:58

@Jakey056

Id be more concerned that you cannot see that long term this is bad for her. She is 12.... I cannot help but think this does nothing to help her appreciate the value of money, just piss it away online? What about gambling, would you be happy if she were betting on a horse and lost it? Same thing really. Poor parenting when she needs better.

Oh fuck off seriously this is the most patronising comment I've ever seen on here! Do you let your dc buy toys with Xmas money? This is no different it's just different interests.

Op why don't you just have her donate the lot to local food bank then I think mnet would be happy..

Original poster
IndieTara · 05/01/2021 22:58

@Ithinkim read all my posts then comment

OP posts:
Allispretty · 05/01/2021 22:59

@MegBusset

BTW for those who say it's a waste. At that age all my pocket money went on sweets, Smash Hits / Look In, Panini stickers and down the local Chinese... Hardly worthy long-term investments! I think on this thread (and in general) there is a value judgement on gaming = bad as it's not how we spent our youth.

Exactly! Inflation also means children are getting a lot more In terms of money than we had to spend as children!

Original poster
IndieTara · 05/01/2021 23:02

@Jakey056 I'm pretty sure they'd throw her out of William Hill or a casino so I think we're safe.

OP posts:
OrangePlumGrape · 05/01/2021 23:04

I let my dc spend their own money on games if they want to. One still loves toys at 12 but the other has never been interested in plastic tat but enjoys gaming. Both are an equal waste to me, one marginally better for the environment. If they get birthday / Christmas money they are welcome to spend it on what they like and suffer the natural consequences. I think this teaches money management, if they waste their spends then they don’t get more.

Original poster
IndieTara · 05/01/2021 23:06

@MegBusset @Allispretty so did mine ( not the panini stickers ) and from 14 when I got my first Saturday job I bought all my own clothes and toiletries. ( back in the day when you could work at 14 )

OP posts:
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