Ode to my Shark Vacuum cleaner - how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways

[Belleende]

Is it because you block every time I use you. EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Is it because even after spending 20 minutes unblocking you, then vacuuming after, you block again and spew everything out all over the floor the moment I switch you off, and I then have to do the unblocking rigmarole all over again.

Is it because you block not in one place but in three places, which can take multiple implements and 20 minutes to unblock.

Is it because the brushes are so harsh they have considerably hastened the need to replace the hall and stairs carpet.

Do not do what I did last year on a mumsnet recommendation and get one in the sales, I nearly launched ours out my bedroom window this afternoon.

Our original Dyson lasted 12 years. Then we had a cheap thing that set itself alight after about three weeks.
In a told you so moment I went out against DH wishes and bought another Dyson.
We were on first name terms with the engineer during the 5 year warranty and he came out about a month before it expired. By that point he was replacing parts as a preemptive strike. That machine was like Cher, nothing original left when it finally limped out of service shortly after.
Bought a G Tech, we are around 2 years in now. It's neither brilliant nor useless and comes with bags they recommend you replace a lot more often than is strictly necessary.

I love my shark, works perfectly and hasn’t ever got blocked.

Blocking implies a modicum of suction ... Our first was amazing but died two months in and we got a new one. This one is losing its suction day by day. Still fab on dust and hair but won't pick up anything visible to the human eye. Utterly infuriating so it's going back next week.

I'm sticking with my Miele. Their motto seems to be "Don't screw with a design that works". It's also coped with me having a temper tantrum over it more than once too, which is more than can be said of DH's old Dyson.
Cumbersome heavy piece of crap that was. Also why were the only carrying handles on the bits that come off? I have a less than find memory of hauling it up the stairs only to see it tumble back down end over end, whilst I was left holding the extendable hose.

Miele all the way here. Ours is twelve years old and still going strong. Have probably jinxed it now...

I hate hate hate my cordless shark for all the reasons people have given above. But I have just ordered a corded one ( lift away pet version with anti hair wrap thingy) - am I going to hate that too
or are you all talking about the cordless ones ? Nearly paid the extra for a sebo and now thinking maybe I should have done so.

I love my Henry. It's been the best thing ever!!!

You've described my Dyson, hate the fucking thing. Can't cope with a tiny amount of dust without needing its filter washed and dried for 300 hours.
Dyson customer service answer their phones 'hello Dyson, we don't give a shit' then hang up.

My Roomba on the other hand just goes and goes and goes. Bin stuffed to the brim and it hardly complains. Just waits patiently, doffs it's hat and off it goes.

Ours is a corded LiftAway Shark. Sorry. Sebo all the way. It's ugly (but the Shark's uglier), not remotely flash, it's got hardly any buttons, but it is bloody effective.

This thread really cheered me up
😂😂

I have a Dyson cordless and after 4 years it doesn't hold its charge for more than 7 minutes...

I won't be buying a shark 😬

I'm going to chuck my Shark I've barely used. I have Henry for downstairs.

Can anyone recommend a good one for doing the actual stairs? They go up, and then round a corner and up again.

Henry is hard to use and balance at the same time. Don't want to waste more money on another useless one

I hate hate hate my cordless shark for all the reasons people have given above. But I have just ordered a corded one ( lift away pet version with anti hair wrap thingy)

Sorry to say, mine was corded, lift away anti hair wrap, pet version. fingers crossed that you get one that you are happy with like some other posters.

its is strange that there is no middle ground, either the best thing since sliced bread or utter pile crap.

Chesney I would recommend a Gtech Hylite, it has a telescopic handle and is very light so ideal for the stairs. You can take the handle off completely and just use the base. I was really suprised at how well it picks up as it feels really flimsy.

The only thing I dislike is that it has (tiny) bags, but the suction and weight make up for it.

Mine doesn't do any of this!

I've heard mixed reports too, OP. Feel for you
I wouldn't be parted from my Miele vacuum cleaner. It's never let me down. All these other ones are just too gimmicky.

I've been in love with my corded anti hairwrap xl since March. Im addicted to it, dh isn't allowed to touch it. I have been known to polish it and Its never let me down yet. I never thought I'd gush about a vacuum!

Which model do you have?

We’ve go a lift away (anti hair wrap/pet hair one) and we love it,
But I’ve heard mixed reviews about the handheld stick vacuum model.

I have a liftaway, it’s fab.

These are all useful tips for next time we need a new one! If you need to phone Dyson, they politely corrected me more than once. They really don't like to hear you saying you were 'hoovering'. I'm unfashionably old school 😂😂😂

@Whatisapension thank you! I'll look at those 😊

I feel I may have found my people. I bought a cordless shark a couple of years ago and every time I use it I feel like I say I hate it. It constantly gets clogged with dog hair despite being a pet version. The only saving grace is the 2 battery packs. It is also surprisingly heavy for a cordless.

So I’ve decided to go back to a cordless Dyson in the sales, and the shark is off to work (our own business) as they work one is on its last legs. It is a present to myself. I have got a robot vacuum too, and that is great, but sometimes you need both.

Hated mine. Thankfully it broke 10 months after I bought it, and Argos replaced it for me straight away. Bought a plug in vax, which blows the shark out the water, and although I loved the convenience of cordless, neither dyson, shark or gtech compare to the mains operated vax.

I thought I was alone in hating my Shark. Totally agree about the blocking. I can only use mine a couple of times before it stops and needs taking apart to find out what’s wrong. It also won’t pick up very well. I ended up finding a spare part for my old traditional vacuum and repaired it - much better.

Our Shark is an upright corded and it’s bloody brilliant! Would never go back to any other model.

Just used my cordless shark to clean up after taking the Christmas tree down.
It had three hissy fits in the time I was using it. Three! Blocked in various places.
All because some pine needles wanted to be sucked up.

What self-respecting vacuum cleaner won’t suck up pine needles? Bag of shite.