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Original poster

DS saw me and DH in the bath together

177 replies

CharDee · 29/12/2020 18:02

DS was fast asleep last night and I decided to have a glass of wine and watch something in the bath. Dh came up to refill my glass after a little while and then he got in with me (I emptied most of the water out and filled it up again).!

Anyway, we were sat with wine last night just talking about plans for the next few days when DS walked in. DH was sat behind me and I was leaning back on him. DS asked what we were doing and DH just said having a relax in the bath. He came over to the bath and asked if he could have a bath with that many bubbles next time. We said he could, he went to the toilet and then back to bed. Didn't think any more of it.

Today we were talking to my sister on FaceTime and DS said to her that he was getting a bath with as many bubbles as mummy and daddy had when he saw us in the bath last night. Later my sister told me that it was really irresponsible and inappropriate for DS to have seen us like that and that it might cause problems later on. She couldn't explain what exactly it was that made it irresponsible though.

I just laughed at her and said he was fine, didn't actually see anything anyway apart from us just having a bit of a cuddle together.

I told DH and he said he feels a bit awkward about others knowing we were in the bath together but can't explain why.

I don't see the problem with it at all and all DS was bothered about was the number of bubbles we had! He would usually be asleep all night and wouldn't have even have known we were in there.

Does anybody else do this or can anyone tell me what is actually wrong with doing this?!

OP posts:
mam0918 · 29/12/2020 19:14

Im amazed you managed to share a bath... me and DH seem to run on tempratures from different planets, I litrally cooled the bath as low as I could handle it (sat shivering) and DH was still yelping and practically holding his nuts above his head like he was stepping into lava.

Confusedandshaken · 29/12/2020 19:15

I don't think any child has ever been damaged by seeing his parents having an amicable chat with no sex involved or erogenous zones visible. Your sister is being odd or prudish or both.

harriethoyle · 29/12/2020 19:18

Get DS some Matey OP!

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Lockdownlife245 · 29/12/2020 19:20

I think it’s fine and lovely that you and your husband would do that together to relax. It’s not as if he caught you having sex and you had to explain that one x

Original poster
CharDee · 29/12/2020 19:20

@mam0918 hahaha! Your poor dh! I'm the one who can't stand to be hot and DH loves burning hot water but we manage to compromise and he will sit closer to the tap if we refill so it's not as hot when it gets to me. I mean, I know that doesn't make a massive difference but I feel like it's cooler by then 🤷🏼‍♀️

She has 3 children. 1 is 19 who lives with us and then 2 younger girls both under 10. She just isn't a fan of affection at all. Thinking about it more now, at her wedding she hated dancing with BIL and literally kept him at arms length during their first dance. So the idea of being so close to another person in a bath probably sickens her Grin

OP posts:
FreeBettyBoop · 29/12/2020 19:23

That sounds nice. My husband and I wouldn’t fit in the bath together (he’s like 6’5)

nearlynermal · 29/12/2020 19:25

Your son has seen an example of a lovely happy (better than) normal relationship, OP, and he seems entirely unscarred by it. I think that sounds just fine.

Wiredforsound · 29/12/2020 19:27

YABVVU for not letting your DS have big bubble baths too! Other than that I think it’s lovely for a child to see his parents being relaxed and happy in each other’s company. It’s not uncommon or odd for couples to bathe together, especially after a hard day at work. You get to relax, unwind, and put the world to rights in a warm, comfortable, and informal environment.

Haggertyjane · 29/12/2020 19:30

Next time tell him to get in and enjoy the bubbles too

Eddie16 · 29/12/2020 19:32

My dd is 5 and loves a bath with either myself or dh. She is a water baby and will strip off as soon as she hears the tap running! Sometimes I sit on the closed toilet seat and have a chat if dh is in there by himself or if dd has got in, then again I'll chat to them both in the bath about life and mundane things.
It hasn't scarred her at all but I will stop it when she gets older.
Dd also thinks it's funny when dh is in the shower and I open the door and whistle at him 😂. People are all different with nudity and physical touches but each to their own.

notherchge · 29/12/2020 19:35

how did DS manage to have children? Probably rampant behind closed doors while being a prude in public. We regularly have a bath together (only bubbles for drinking) and with the kids when they were a lot smaller (lots of bubbles), absolutely continue with the baths.

Thehogfatherstolemycurry · 29/12/2020 19:38

I love a bath with dh, sometimes one of the kids will wander in to the bathroom for a chat if both/one of us are in the bath. (they're 11and12)
Last time adult dd was visiting and I was in the bath she chucked her dd in with me while she chatted with us.
Nudity doesn't have to be sexualised or seen of as wrong unless your dc are uncomfortable with it.
My dcs are always impressed both me and dh fit in the bath together.

Suzi888 · 29/12/2020 19:40

Nothing wrong at all!

thebluehen · 29/12/2020 19:43

Some people are just plain odd.

Surely DS seeing mummy and daddy having a bath together shows you have a good relationship which should be reassuring for your DS.

You've done nothing wrong.

Mulhollandmagoo · 29/12/2020 19:45

No, I don't see anything wrong with it at all, I think it's healthy for children to see their parents being affectionate towards each other

shrill · 29/12/2020 19:46

I have bath envy as we used to have a large deep bath and bubble envy too.

Presumably your bedroom is accessible and you do not avoid being seen in bed together. Your son was not suprised just had bubble envy and i hope you are no longer stingy with the bubbles !

Mulhollandmagoo · 29/12/2020 19:46

And, god help you if your son doesn't have the bubbliest bath ever next time he gets in 😂

Sweetooth92 · 29/12/2020 19:52

I’d bulk buy yourself a pallet of the matey. It’s gonna be a month of a bottle a night while he gets his fill.
No other issues here. Other than your sister is a bit twitchy. We share a bath often. It doesn’t strike me as odd

emilybev1986 · 29/12/2020 19:54

As long as you weren't sitting at the tap end...

justanotherneighinparadise · 29/12/2020 20:01

Nothing to see here.

Treemama · 29/12/2020 20:03

Nothing wrong with that. I've got bathtub jealousy Grin

Respectabitch · 29/12/2020 20:05

Our bath is a bit small for me and DH together now. So jell. Although tbh when we were in there together, naughtiness did generally ensue 😁

You've done nothing wrong though and your DS will be fine. Your sister clearly has Issues.

VodselForDinner · 29/12/2020 20:06

The only inappropriate thing here was the waste of all that water.

(Yes, this is my most Mumsnet response ever).

UntamedWisteria · 29/12/2020 20:06

DH & I have shared a bath together literally every Sunday morning for the past 20 years.

The DC have often walked in on us at all different ages.

They are now in their late teens/eraly 20s and don't seem to be scarred by the experience.

maddiemookins16mum · 29/12/2020 20:09

I wish I could still fit in the bath with DH. Actually I do fit but getting out is not a pretty sight.

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