Is someone told you they lost their parents when they were “young”, how old would you assume they were?

[Restorationandredecoration]

Title says it all really. Is someone told you they lost both parents when they were young what age range would you assume? What would be the cut off above which you wouldn’t call someone young for losing their parents?

She's a grade A cunt for her reply to you.
You lost your parents when you were young. And so l'm sorry that you did

@Crunchymum sorry to hear that and it's true, when we lose a loving parent the pain is awful, age doesn't matter. x

Under 25 for one parent. Under 35 for both parents.

Gosh that’s awful. I lost my dad when I was 26 and he was 46. He was way too young and I too was young. Very sad. I’m sorry OP I hope you’re ok x

2 and they were 26 and 27

Twenties or younger.
Thirties would be "quite young"
Forties isn't that young to lose yours parents at all.

She was very insensitive.
Of course you lost your parents young.
I'm sorry op.

I'd assume "when I was young" meant under 18. Maybe because I'm only early thirties myself?

But it depends on context, in the way you said it it's more like your clarifying that it wasn't recent. And you can describe your loss however you want, you don't have to fit other peoples' definitions.

You were young op! I'd say anything under 25/30. I was 23 when my dad died, my youngest db was 17

Either she has not lost a parent and hasnt a clue what's it's like, I've found people have very superior ideas about parental death when they've never experienced it

Or she was a child when her parents died and really does know the pain of it.

I suspect the former given the awkward silence and that she didnt corroborate her opinion with "I was only 5" or whatever....

You've lived more than half your life without one parent and nearly half your life without the other, that's really sad and she was incredibly insensitive whatever her own circumstances

I'm amazed by so many people on this thread only classing 'Under 18 / 20 / 25/ or even 30' as "young to have lost both parents.

I am mid 50s. Apart from myself, I can hardly think of any of my peers who have lost both their parents. Most are either coping with trying to support parents who are becoming frail, or they have lost one of their parents within the last 5 years or so.

I was 38 when my second parent died, and I feel that was pretty young. My eldest dc has a vague memory of his Grandad but the younger two don't, and that makes me feel sad. However, at least I had both my parents at my wedding, and when I had my babies.

I think 19 and 23 is incredibly young to have lost parents. However, as I said yesterday, whatever age it is, the other woman should have been sensitive enough to recognise that this is about how the OP feels, and NOT about her opinion of what anyone is allowed to rate as young.

I'd actually assume you meant when you were a child, but I wouldn't ask what age you were and I wouldn't reply like she did.

I'd actually assume you meant when you were a child

I don't get the people saying this. As if at 18 you are no longer young, as if 19 is not young to have lost a parent? Crazy.....of course it's young!!

That is young to lose your parents. Of course it is.

My dad had lost both parents by the time he was 10. That's young.

My dad had lost both parents by the time he was 10. That's young

That's extremely young. 19 and 23 is also young.

That is young OP and even if the nasty lady disagreed for some reason how rude of her to say that!

I'd have assumed you meant as a child.

But my mum died when I was 6 and my dad when I was 23. I'd personally say I was young when my mum died, but wouldn't refer to myself as young when talking about my dads death.

I lost my mum when I was 31 and pregnant with my first and my dad at 33 (pregnant with my twins). Is/was horrific. I’d say I was young, I really needed my mum over those baby years.
Until people have experienced such loss, they really don’t get it. The insensitivity of some of the things mentioned on this thread is horrible but doesn’t surprise me.
Loss is with you everywhere you go, the card shop, the store emails, the constant discussion about hugging your parents at Xmas during the pandemic.
Sorry the school gate mum was such a prick.

Under 25

Early 20s and younger. So yes, I'd say you were young.

Is she early 20s? There's one mum at school who has a real chip on her shoulder about her age and constantly tells everyone she's not young.

I lost both of mine when i was 26....i considered myself young...now 20 years on and most of my friends still have both parents still alive.

@Restorationandredecoration

I was 19 when I lost my father, 23 when I lost my mother. I am 41 now. It was just an odd reaction from her. Like I was trying to describe myself as an orphan or something.

That's definitely young to lose both parents.

I would of assumed that you were under 18 if saying you lost your parents young.
Her reply seemed a little insensitive but people are strange when death of a parent is mentioned. I lost my Dad at 13, people were odd and still can be awkward if it ever crops up in conversation.

@onlythepianoplayer

I'd actually assume you meant when you were a child

I don't get the people saying this. As if at 18 you are no longer young, as if 19 is not young to have lost a parent? Crazy.....of course it's young!!

This. In early twenties most people I know were/are still really reliant on their parents, financially, emotionally and in terms of day to day advice. I really don't understand how people wouldn't see it as young.