Labour friend awful about tories

[tabicae]

NC as probably outing. I have a very close friend who is there for me though everything really and I am for them. We have always avoided politics and have had very different backgrounds. Given what’s been going on recently I’m politics, it’s been hard to avoid the topic.

Whilst I personally have no massive political leaning and can see both sides without coming down massively on either one, she knows that I was brought up in a Tory household and although I have never disclosed who I would vote for, she knows I am on the fence about things and like some Tory polices and some labour. A lot of my childhood was based around things she seems to strongly dislike and is open about...private schools, inheritance, private health, second homes etc.

Anyway..getting to the point. She has become VERY vocal about these things. Slagging off private education and people who went to them (always careful to say ‘there are exceptions’). Being critical of second homes yet happily staying in my parents second homes free of charge for a holiday. And it goes on like that.

She has recently become quite vulgar about tories, calling them and Boris c*nts, etc. I know I feel defensive about this as my dad is a very generous, caring man and he voted for Boris. It feels quite personal.

I’ve noticed that it seems ok on social media and in conversation to being vulgar about tories/anyone who aligns themselves with any Tory policies, yet it is unacceptable to ever do the same if you are a Tory talking about a labour supporter. In fact I am yet to hear a Tory speak so awfully about someone who votes for another party. I feel like her comments are getting in between our friendship and whilst I always knew we differed on this topic it has never ever been an issue between us.

I’m not sure what to say really...maybe she’s always had this view of me and my family and is only now vocalising it? Would you address it?

@roarfeckingroarr

YANBU. The hard left are vile in a way none of my Tory friends are about Labour voters / MPs.

It's a shame that they don't realise that the intolerant militant aggression is a major part of what turns voters off. Yes some people are committed Tories but lots are floating voters (the most sensible way to be imo). Policies matter, but people underestimate the role of attitudes, language, and behaviour. You're not going to get people to vote for you by insulting or attacking them.

Tbh, the word Tory is insult enough, other words are superfluous.

Is Tory an insult? I didn't realise.

It's a shame that they don't realise that the intolerant militant aggression is a major part of what turns voters off. Yes some people are committed Tories but lots are floating voters (the most sensible way to be imo). Policies matter, but people underestimate the role of attitudes, language, and behaviour. You're not going to get people to vote for you by insulting or attacking them.

I doubt very much that people who vote Tory and support people like Boris Johnson, JRM and Gove are going to be swayed by people not using bad language.

Sheepandcow.
Absolutely. I am definitely a floating voter but the previous poster who said that calling people C s was just semantics and indicative of honesty and intelligence was completely off putting to me. I do swear but don’t name call and don’t ’ other’ people. There is a huge difference and I for one don’t see it as a sign of intelligence.

@Pumperthepumper

It's a shame that they don't realise that the intolerant militant aggression is a major part of what turns voters off. Yes some people are committed Tories but lots are floating voters (the most sensible way to be imo). Policies matter, but people underestimate the role of attitudes, language, and behaviour. You're not going to get people to vote for you by insulting or attacking them.

I doubt very much that people who vote Tory and support people like Boris Johnson, JRM and Gove are going to be swayed by people not using bad language.

The many floating voters might.

Why would they though? Why would the bad language put them off over the horrendous Tory policies?

@Pumperthepumper

It's a shame that they don't realise that the intolerant militant aggression is a major part of what turns voters off. Yes some people are committed Tories but lots are floating voters (the most sensible way to be imo). Policies matter, but people underestimate the role of attitudes, language, and behaviour. You're not going to get people to vote for you by insulting or attacking them.

I doubt very much that people who vote Tory and support people like Boris Johnson, JRM and Gove are going to be swayed by people not using bad language.

Actually, I have voted Labour most of my life and actually very much like Keir Starmer. I am put off by the insults and many are because many are swing voters but just carry on....

People vote for the manifesto which they agree with. Not the opinions of other voters surely?

If they don't, then meh, it is up to them.

Just in itself that judgemental attitude "people who vote Tory". Lots and lots of people voted conservative for all sorts of different reasons (including a vote against Corbyn). They are not all Bad People.

Parties should work to appeal to voters instead of dismissively insulting them.

Actually, I have voted Labour most of my life and actually very much like Keir Starmer. I am put off by the insults and many are because many are swing voters but just carry on....

You’re honestly saying you agree with Labour policies, you like the Labour leader, but you don’t vote for them because of some of their supporters?

@SheepandCow

Just in itself that judgemental attitude "people who vote Tory". Lots and lots of people voted conservative for all sorts of different reasons (including a vote against Corbyn). They are not all Bad People.

Parties should work to appeal to voters instead of dismissively insulting them.

And just like that, no answer to the question. Why would they be put off by Labour supporters on Twitter and instead vote for Brexit and spare room tax and benefit sanctions?

@Pumperthepumper

Actually, I have voted Labour most of my life and actually very much like Keir Starmer. I am put off by the insults and many are because many are swing voters but just carry on....

You’re honestly saying you agree with Labour policies, you like the Labour leader, but you don’t vote for them because of some of their supporters?

I expect she's saying that the floating/swing voters who, last time, voted conservative are unlikely to want to vote for the party whose supporters and activist party members call them cunts.

@SheepandCow

Just in itself that judgemental attitude "people who vote Tory". Lots and lots of people voted conservative for all sorts of different reasons (including a vote against Corbyn). They are not all Bad People.

Parties should work to appeal to voters instead of dismissively insulting them.

I apologise, I misread your response.

I still don’t agree. I don’t think anyone votes Tory just because Labour supporters use the C-word. It might make it less likely that they tell people they voted Tory, but I’d guess that’s more a conscious thing.

I expect she's saying that the floating/swing voters who, last time, voted conservative are unlikely to want to vote for the party whose supporters and activist party members call them cunts.

And I’m saying that doesn’t make sense. You either agree with Tory policies, in which case you need to expect people will be angry and confused by your choice, or you vote Labour because you don’t like Tory policies.

Absolutely nobody votes based on the public persona of the party supporters - and we know that because then nobody would vote Tory or UKIP.

@tabicae in relation to your original post

NC as probably outing. I have a very close friend who is there for me though everything really and I am for them. We have always avoided politics and have had very different backgrounds. Given what’s been going on recently I’m politics, it’s been hard to avoid the topic.

I really don't think this is outing as I think plenty of people are speaking out against this particular Government and their policies.

Oh and if you want to hear a Tory speaking disparagingly about people from different walks of life, have a listen to Jacob Rees-Mogg.
Teresa May coined the term the 'nasty party' for how Tories are perceived, unfortunately for all of us it's their own policies and behaviours that perpetuate this.

@Pumperthepumper

Actually, I have voted Labour most of my life and actually very much like Keir Starmer. I am put off by the insults and many are because many are swing voters but just carry on....

You’re honestly saying you agree with Labour policies, you like the Labour leader, but you don’t vote for them because of some of their supporters?

Actually, yes right now. I would vote for Starmer and consider him a safe pair of hands but there has been a bullying, self righteous and loud contingent in the party ( who thrived under Corbyn) who really concern me. People who feel that those with different opinions are open to abuse because they are’ wrong’ do worry me. It is a slippery slope.

Sheepandcow.
You’re right😀.
Being referred to as a cunt after the last election hasn’t convinced me to return to the fold...

Pumperthepumper
Brexit is a very separate issue from the social housing bedroom tax (inspired by Labour's bedroom tax on private renters). Plenty of Labour voters are Brexiters. Jeremy Corbyn is a Brexiter. As was once Tony Blair:

www.google.com/amp/s/www.chroniclelive.co.uk/news/north-east-news/tony-blairs-election-pledges-1983-12938528.amp

Perhaps the voters concerned about benefit cuts remember Blair's war on the disabled. It was Labour that introduced the cuts aka 'reforms'. It was the Blair government that replaced the Department of Social Security with the disabled erasing Department of Work and Pensions.

Actually, yes right now. I would vote for Starmer and consider him a safe pair of hands but there has been a bullying, self righteous and loud contingent in the party ( who thrived under Corbyn) who really concern me. People who feel that those with different opinions are open to abuse because they are’ wrong’ do worry me. It is a slippery slope.

A slipppery slope to what?

If she cannot appreciate others views and continues to be rude, I would quietly start seeing her less (easy to do during lock down.... People who think they are always right are boring

@Pumperthepumper
By your argument (not mine I hasten to add) you think all labour voters are cunts? Afterall they voted for the party that was responsible for starting the war on the disabled. And was, at the time of the last election, headed by an anti-Semitic racist.

@SheepandCow

Pumperthepumper Brexit is a very separate issue from the social housing bedroom tax (inspired by Labour's bedroom tax on private renters). Plenty of Labour voters are Brexiters. Jeremy Corbyn is a Brexiter. As was once Tony Blair:

www.google.com/amp/s/www.chroniclelive.co.uk/news/north-east-news/tony-blairs-election-pledges-1983-12938528.amp

Perhaps the voters concerned about benefit cuts remember Blair's war on the disabled. It was Labour that introduced the cuts aka 'reforms'. It was the Blair government that replaced the Department of Social Security with the disabled erasing Department of Work and Pensions.

That was ten years ago. You’re suggesting that the Tory party is so weak it’s still riding on the coat tails of the last government? You can’t seriously believe that.

Brexit is absolutely a Tory issue. It was a Tory party strop that led to the vote in the first place. It was a pathetic peeing contest between a handful of grumbling MPs, and nothing more.

[quote SheepandCow]@Pumperthepumper
By your argument (not mine I hasten to add) you think all labour voters are cunts? Afterall they voted for the party that was responsible for starting the war on the disabled. And was, at the time of the last election, headed by an anti-Semitic racist.[/quote]
I think there’s an awful lot of problems in the Labour Party - I think Scotland in particular has been massively let down by Labour.

I wouldn’t be put off voting for them because some of their supporters call the OP’s dad a cunt, no.

@Pumperthepumper

I expect she's saying that the floating/swing voters who, last time, voted conservative are unlikely to want to vote for the party whose supporters and activist party members call them cunts.

And I’m saying that doesn’t make sense. You either agree with Tory policies, in which case you need to expect people will be angry and confused by your choice, or you vote Labour because you don’t like Tory policies.

Absolutely nobody votes based on the public persona of the party supporters - and we know that because then nobody would vote Tory or UKIP.

How absolutely arrogant you are. I should expect that people should be angry. More people voted conservative in the last election. You must live in a self reflecting social bubble not to understand some of the reasons why. Do you expect people to be angry at you that you voted for a party that has shown to have real problems with anti Semitism and a leader that was clearly anti semitic? Like I said before, it is not goodies and baddies.