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Just been contacted by friend abroad in dire straits

465 replies

WhatdoIdo2020 · 12/09/2020 09:47

Have name changed.

Several years ago I went on a tour of a country I've always wanted to visit. A very beautiful yet poor country with amazing wildlife. I had an amazing time and the guide was very friendly and knowledgeable. We stayed friends on Facebook and have spoken a few times since then.

Anyway he's just contacted me on Messenger and said that all the tours have been cancelled because of Covid and he's starving. He had a child who he'd saved up for to study abroad and the child recently died in an accident over there and now he's got no money and wasn't able to bring him home for the funeral.

I'm not sure what to do. Just giving? There's another one of the people on the tour who I'm still friends with on FB so I might ask if she's heard from him too.

I feel awful 😥

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
BigBadVoodooHat · 12/09/2020 15:21

I have no doubt hes telling the truth.

You have no doubt that someone you don’t know, that you’ve read about on the internet, posted by someone else that you don’t know and who themselves barely knows the man in question, is definitely telling the truth?

MagentaRocks · 12/09/2020 15:23

Working for the police we see this a lot, where people have thought they have had a message from a friend or acquaintance and given money only to find that the message wasn’t from who they thought it was and have lost money. This very much sounds like this and if you give money you won’t be helping your acquaintance.

AlternativePerspective · 12/09/2020 15:24

Even if it’s someone you genuinely know well and trust you would check with them in person before handing over money, given this is so well known.

The fact the OP doesn’t even have a way to contact him is clear evidence that she doesn’t know him at all and therefore can’t know if he’s trustworthy. I often used to wonder how people could fall for these scams, now I see that the world is just full of willing fools who wish to part with their money.

Holothane · 12/09/2020 15:40

Scam alarm bells.

WhatdoIdo2020 · 12/09/2020 15:45

I've sent an email to the tour company, will see what they say.

OP posts:
GallusAlice79 · 12/09/2020 15:50

@WhatdoIdo2020

I received an email from a tour guide I had in a foreign country. There was no "story", just a flat out request for some help due to COVID. His country was hit particularly badly.

The email came direct from him (same email address as when I booked him) and on Trip Advisor he was getting reviews right up until COVID hit.

He was absolutely brilliant as a guide, so I didn't hesitate. Paid via PayPal to his email address.

Glad I did it!

uncomfortablydumb53 · 12/09/2020 15:55

This happened to my DS1's Friend Her Messenger had been hacked
Just because you know the actual contact doesn't mean that it's him texting you
Do not fall for it ignore and block

GallusAlice79 · 12/09/2020 15:56

@WhatdoIdo2020

I should say I haven't read the full thread and if you were wary of it being a scam then don't do it.

But this came direct from the guy, no mis-spelling or weirdness. He's a top rated tour guide on Trip Advisor, and I used PayPal.

He also wrote back to me afterwards to say thanks.

GlassInEachHand · 12/09/2020 15:57

Dear Scamster, I'm so sorry to hear about your troubles. I have such fantastic memories of the time I spent in Madagascar and especially enjoyed that day you showed me around Random Attraction in Madagascar. Do you remember? I hope to be able to help you out soon. Love, Whatdo.
Of course, you never actually went to said Random Attraction in Madagascar, but the reply you receive - if any - should be all the proof you need that it's indeed a scam.

Soapysoap · 12/09/2020 15:57

If I could help I would. I'd sooner send to someone directly than through a big charity with a CEO skimming hundreds of thousands out the pot. Its no different to giving food to beggars. They might be genuine. They might not be.

slashlover · 12/09/2020 15:58

I received an email from a tour guide I had in a foreign country. There was no "story", just a flat out request for some help due to COVID. His country was hit particularly badly.

The email came direct from him (same email address as when I booked him) and on Trip Advisor he was getting reviews right up until COVID hit.

You don't know it was him, Email addresses are easily spoofed otherwise people wouldn't respond to phishing emails because the email address was the some one their bank/paypal used. Email accounts can easily be hacked. Obviously, it may have been legitimate but without speaking to him or verifying then you cannot be sure.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Email_spoofing

Email spoofing is the creation of email messages with a forged sender address.

Quaagars · 12/09/2020 16:05

It's easy to see how scamming is so rife when it seems there's so many people willing to get sucked in on the off chance!

Thehogfatherstolemycurry · 12/09/2020 16:06

It's not the same as giving it to someone begging on the street because the likely hood is thescammer is not in any dire straits or even in that country, they're probably in a very comfortable place in a first world country!

GallusAlice79 · 12/09/2020 16:06

@slashlover

Correct, I don't know. But I took a reasoned guess that it was him as:

He knew details of our trip
He used nicknames as opposed to full names
There was no sob story
I paid for the trip via Paypal and this payment was exactly the same

At the end of the day, yes it might be a scam, but on balance I think not. And really either way the financial cost is the same to me, so happy to risk it.

FinallyHere · 12/09/2020 16:13

I can see now that the other woman isn't FB friends with him now.

I'm very sorry. You sound like a lovely person but this is so very likely to be a scam. It's designed to tug at the strings of your heart.

The very best thing you can do is to make a donation to a reputable charity.

Malahaha · 12/09/2020 16:13

Surely this experience would make you think that people like these are unlikely to send emails or messages asking for help. Not the opposite.

Why would I think that? They know me well, they like me. If they are desperate, why wouldn't they ask for help? Wouldn't you? I don't think you quite grasp the situation. It's not like in a country where benefits are available. They have nothing, if there is no work. Why wouldn't they ask a person whom they know can afford to fly to India almost every year and rent a nice cottage, whom they know cares about poverty and has helped others, gives to beggars, etc?

GoldfishParade · 12/09/2020 16:18

These replies make me feel sad that so many people have seemingly zero idea what damage the pandemic has done to non first world countries. So much cynicism here. I would ask to call him and feel it out.

Yeahnahmum · 12/09/2020 16:19

Everyone is saying SCAM
And op is just over there going "lalalalalallalalallala🙉"

😂

Malahaha · 12/09/2020 16:19

@Soapysoap

If I could help I would. I'd sooner send to someone directly than through a big charity with a CEO skimming hundreds of thousands out the pot. Its no different to giving food to beggars. They might be genuine. They might not be.
This. Many charities are the real scammers, with rich people pulling the strings. I do know a few reputable ones, but I'm suspicious of the big ones. It's nice to help someone directly. You can get a full meal in an Indian restaurant for £2. A little goes a long way.

There seems to be some evidence, in this particular case, of Facebook hacking, which is different. I would not hesitate one minute to send money to any of the poor Indians I know who were living hand to mouth at the best of times, if they let me know they were in trouble.

BigBadVoodooHat · 12/09/2020 16:25

These replies make me feel sad that so many people have seemingly zero idea what damage the pandemic has done to non first world countries

These replies make me feel sad that so many people have seemingly zero idea of the unscrupulousness of organised criminal gangs who will exploit awareness of the damage the pandemic has done to non first world countries by using it to add seemingly convincing backstory to their scams.

slashlover · 12/09/2020 16:28

These replies make me feel sad that so many people have seemingly zero idea what damage the pandemic has done to non first world countries. So much cynicism here. I would ask to call him and feel it out.

It is a very well known scam. I'm sure most PPs would be saying the same no matter where the friend was based.

mumbaimirror.indiatimes.com/coronavirus/news/fb-friend-asking-for-money-could-be-a-hacker/articleshow/75213923.cms

www.theguardian.com/money/2019/jul/03/facebook-friends-scam-money-paypal

www.consumerreports.org/scams-fraud/facebook-messenger-scams-how-to-avoid/

www.rd.com/article/facebook-messenger-scams/

www.lifewire.com/i-need-money-facebook-scam-2654773

BigBadVoodooHat · 12/09/2020 16:29

Everyone is saying SCAM

Not quite everyone. There's a worrying proportion of posters wittering 'oooooh, but I'd rather just be nice and hand money I can afford to lose to people-trafficking, drug-dealing criminal scammers than have people think that I might be a rotten meanie'.

ancientgran · 12/09/2020 16:32

BigBadVoodooHat that isn't what people said and they weren't wittering. Can't you make a point without being rude?

BlueThistles · 12/09/2020 16:32

Not quite everyone. There's a worrying proportion of posters wittering 'oooooh, but I'd rather just be nice and hand money I can afford to lose to people-trafficking, drug-dealing criminal scammers than have people think that I might be a rotten meanie

it's no wonder Scamming thrives 🌺

DianaT1969 · 12/09/2020 16:40

To the posters saying 'starving to death but can afford internet'. You do realise that internet is free in many places? Hotel lobbies, coffee shops, offices. What strange worlds you live in that you've never encountered free WiFi on your travels.
If this man is a tour guide, he'll have access.
I'm not saying it isn't a scam, but these Daily Mail reader style comments are unpleasant. There are poor people in the world who are desperate and don't get state aid.