How on earth do you have sex when you have teenagers!

[Pitterpatterpotter]

It’s getting increasingly difficult! They go to bed late, dh gets up early for work and they often like watching films with us and spending time with us in the evenings which is lovely..... but we don’t often get time alone. Even when we are downstairs alone we could easily be disturbed and the floors don’t feel thick enough to have sex upstairs while they are awake without me being paranoid we’d be heard!
In 20 years together we’ve never had so little time for sex apart from when dc were tiny. Help! Any suggestions?!

Following! Have the same problem here!

Go out for a drive in the car.

Same! Weekend mornings seem to be the only available time.

I am looking forward to a weekend away...in about 5 years.

We are fine but we have our bedroom on the ground floor (converted bungalow) while they are on the top floor and there are 2 fire doors and a fair distance between us and them. Nice for you that they want to spend time with you though! Ours barely acknowledge our presence

Would a lock on your bedroom door work?
Say your going upstairs to relax, lock the door and put the radio/TV on to cover the noise?

Very quietly!

I find about 2am is a good time or 6 am , except I’m not a morning person .

Does the tap in the bathroom need fixing?
How about the light?
Then there’s the dodgy shower!

@TinkersTailor

Would a lock on your bedroom door work? Say your going upstairs to relax, lock the door and put the radio/TV on to cover the noise?

Couldn't be more obvious. You'd scsr them for life

We redesigned our house 8 years ago when our kids all went to bed by 7pm. Little did we realise the impact that having all our bedrooms right next to each other would have when they were going to bed at the same time !

You don’t.

@Titsywoo I know it’s really nice and my oldest son wants to watch films with us most nights at the moment which is precious as he’s growing up so fast.

... but believe me, as long as they have their earphones on while competing with friends on the Xbox, you are safe for as long as they are laughing their heads off.

Like a PP, very quietly.🤣

@BluebellsGreenbells we actually have a code phrase similar to those that we use to go upstairs in the day! But we also have a younger dc which makes day time sex harder. The teenagers often go out in the day but the little one doesn’t, although I’ve started letting them take him out to the local park which gives us the odd hour alone!

@Vargas this is a problem you don’t think about when they are little. When they were toddlers I was too tired for sex and where the bedrooms were wasn’t an issue!

Send them to the local shop for some emergency milk / bread / whatever. Give them a few quid to buy a bar of chocolate and a drink too (incentivises them to go!)
Then have a quickie while they are out

Difficult isn't it. Dh goes to bed before our eldest and is up early in the morning. I'm hoping for some time when schools go back

@ballsdeep Why? Does no one else relax in their room of an evening with the lock on and the TV?

My dad did, my mum did (both single!)

Is it really that obvious? Wouldn't a lock on the door and some music cover it? If you can be heard downstairs you need thicker carpets or an extra thick rug.

2am...quietly!

Send them all out to a distant chippy or sweet shop.

In normal (non-Covid) times, do they have any weekend classes/clubs in the middle of the day? At the same time?

No! No! No!!!!!
We just got our sex life back after DD turned 1 and is a more reliable sleeper. She'll go a decent stretch.

What are you talking about?!
So we could lose it all again in 6 odd years?

Our teenagers are out a lot so it's not really an issue for us. I think your major problem is that you have teenagers AND a younger child.